For me, Formidable
by Itdoesringabell
Summary: [Sequel to La Bohème] This is New York, this is them, and this is real.
1. Chapter 1

_Hi lovelies! Here is the first chapter to the sequel to La Bohème. __Title is Aznavour, again, and the image is by a photograph names Malcolm Kahn._

_This fic is all about Dan and Blair being an adorable couple and facing everything that happens in the second half of the canon season 4 together. In a nutshell, lots of fluff and lots of drama -canon, and from my own imagination. Also, Dan is so not Gossip Girl in this story._

_This is also a fic really about frienship, between Dan and Blair and with the other characters as well. _

_Lastly, it is M rated. Because I love me some smut and since they are together now... I hope it doesn't throw some people away, because La Bohème was safer._

_Hope you like the first installment. Enjoy!_

* * *

It's everything Blair remembers, but in a better dimension.

It's only a week, but it's enough. It's made of long walks around the garden in the afternoon, with Handsome running next to them; of fine dinners with Harold and Roman, of watching movies with the dim light of the fireplace. It's made of lingering goodnight kisses at her door, before he presses her hand in his and goes to the guest room. It's made of wine drinking, poetry reading, and smile exchanges. Blair doesn't think she has ever smiled that much during a vacation.

Her father never comments about her bringing a boy with her for her stay. He simply smiles when Blair tells him "_You remember my friend, Dan_" and welcomes them warmly, the only way he knows how. Blair ignores his smile when Dan kisses her very publicly on New Year, and when she lets him.

They never talk about New York, putting it in a box of things that don't need to be discussed, that shouldn't reach them for the time being. She can't think of him as her boyfriend, because it sounds too childish, and not nearly enough to describe what he is to her. They do things that couples do, and things that simple friends do; it's a merger that she has never experienced in a relationship.

She learns things about him, some insignificants, some that one would call useful. He is lactose intolerant, for instance. He doesn't like rain when it's not summer, and doesn't consider a meal to be a meal if it doesn't have onions in it. Blair doesn't mean to care about those things, but each time she learns one, she finds herself storing it in the back of her mind, just in case –of what, she doesn't know. She learns that Dan is a gentleman who will never allow himself to even sleep in her bed as long as they are in her father's house, no matter how much she tried to convince him. But it comes with realizing that he is stubborn and persistent, which is one of the things she already knew.

They let go of _La Bohème,_ and find a new song to dance to, totally by fluke. They are eating dinner one night, and Harold is making them listen to old records. Blair tells him about how Dan's mother's favorite Aznavour song is the same as him, and Harold insists they listen to his second favorite.

He explains the song to Dan. _For me, formidable_ is about a girl whom the singer finds pretty, and annoying all the same; a girl that he likes despite her mocking him constantly. Dan looks at Blair with a raised eyebrow.

"Sounds familiar to me" he whispers.

Blair shoves him and never admits that she sees the connection.

On their last night at the chateau, Blair requests his help to pack. They decided to leave Lyon early the next morning and spend the day in Paris before having to take a plane back to New York.

Dan should have known better, he thinks when Blair pushes him on her bed and straddles him. Dan should have known that Blair would never trust him with her clothing and that it was a trap. It takes a lot of will power to push her away.

"Roman and Harold are still in the living room" he whispers

"Which is downstairs, very far away. This is a chateau, Humphrey, they wouldn't hear us even if we were playing hard metal"

Blair bats his hands away when he tries to stop her from tugging his sweatshirt up.

"I really can't do this here, Blair" he tells her, the end of the sentence muffled by the fabric she is pushing off him.

Blair throws the clothing over her shoulder and leans down to kiss his neck.

"Here is perfect" she whispers "Come on, Humphrey, don't be such a prude. We've done this before"

"Not _this_" Dan twists his hips away when she tries to unbutton his pants "I just think we should wait"

"Why?" Blair moans, rolling off him and falling numbly on the mattress.

Dan sits up "Blair, it's not you" his fingertips traces the outline of her arm "We haven't even talked to…anyone about us"

"_Anyone_ doesn't matter, Humphrey. Here, it's just you and me"

"It's not because we've been pretending they don't exist, that they actually don't."

Blair sighs. She gets off the bed to walk to her bathroom.

"Leave it to Dan Humphrey to make me experience woman blue balls" she says.

She closes the door to her bathroom. Dan goes to stand in front of it.

"I'm going to bed. See you tomorrow?"

Blair doesn't answer, but he hears her shower running. When she gets out, she finds his collection of Victor Hugo's poems open on the page of his favorite on her bed. Since he can't see her, she allows herself to smile at it.

The next morning, it's dawn, and it's cold when they tell goodbye to Harold and Roman at the train station. Handsome keeps trying to follow Blair, and Roman has to pick it up to keep it still. Unable to move, he just barks, until Blair and Dan get into the train.

Once they are at their seats, Blair goes to the window, and presses her leather-gloved hands against the Plexiglas. Dan gets tendered when he sees her tearing up at the sight of her father becoming a small point on the horizon as the train rolls on its way to Paris.

X

There is a better feeling than setting foot in Paris for the first time, Dan finds. It's setting foot in Paris and feeling familiar with it. The summer light is gone, and the air is white cold, but it's all the same. Same buildings, same sounds, same smell, still Paris. He and Blair go back to the Musée d'Orsay. She takes his hand in hers when they stand in front of _Le déjeuner sur l'herbe_. She puts her head on his shoulder while they gaze together over the _Poppy Field_. He presses a discreet kiss on her cheek in front of Botticelli's _Venus_.

It's everything Blair remembers with him, but in a better dimension.

They eat at a restaurant in _St-Michel_, and sing up for a two o'clock tour at the Cathedral of Notre Dame de Paris. Dan whispers anecdotes about Victor Hugo that she doesn't know, while the tour guide explains things that don't really interest her.

At the _Jardin des Plantes_, they eat pastries that they bought along the way. Nénette has been moved, and it feels bittersweet when they pass in front of her empty spot.

Blair becomes quiet on the way to the plane, because she starts thinking more than she should. Something she probably got with spending too much time with Dan. She thinks of New York, of internships, of Serena and of how perfect she feels when she is away from all of that.

She and Dan lean by the window as the plane takes off, and as they catch a last glimpse of the Eiffel Tower, Blair knows that she is not ready to leave, not ready to go back. It's okay, though, she thinks. As long as she goes back with him.

X

When they arrive in New York, it's raining and it suits both of their moods. Blair's car drops Dan off in Brooklyn. He kisses her, slow and long, before getting out and waving goodbye. The loft is dark, empty and cold.

He calls his father who doesn't even scold him for leaving to Europe without much notice –again. They exchange New Year wishes, chat about things. Near the end of the conversation, Rufus asks if he went alone. Dan hesitates for a few seconds.

"I was with Blair" he says then.

Rufus doesn't say anything else.

The following day, Blair invites him for breakfast. She is waiting in her foyer, already dressed for the day when he steps in. They stare at each other for a few minutes. Then Blair walks to him, and leans up. Dan smiles, leans down and kisses her.

"Good morning" he says.

Blair nuzzles his nose, biting her lip.

"Good morning"

Dorota breaks a glass in the background. Blair scolds her with a look, and takes Dan by the hand, leading him to the breakfast table.

"This week is going to be busy" Blair says as they sit "I have to find an internship, and supervise Dorota taking down the tree since apparently common sense didn't order her to do so"

Dan nods, still trying to process how natural it feels to be there with her, even in New York.

"What are your plans?" she asks

"Same. Minus traumatizing Dorota"

Blair's eyes narrow at him. She starts pouring coffee into a cup.

"Have you heard from…anyone?" she asks.

"My dad" Dan nods "We're supposed to have family brunch later"

Blair frowns "Then why did you come for breakfast?"

"I wanted to see you" he shrugs.

Blair smiles, before letting the worries in again.

"I haven't checked Gossip Girl since we left" she says "I'm afraid of what I would find"

"Me too" Dan admits in a sigh.

They both tense when they hear the elevator chime, and see the doorman come in with several luggage. Serena is following, wrapped up in a heavy coat and looking exhausted. She sighs when she sees them.

Blair stands up rigidly, and Dan simply cannot move. Serena walks toward them and glances down at the table.

"Coffee" she mutters.

She takes Blair's cup to drink from it before wrapping her arms around Blair.

"I'm so happy to see you" she says "The road trip was a bust, I couldn't find a judge, couldn't get access to the files of the case and I have to see my mom to family brunch in two hours"

It takes Blair a while to answer the embrace. She does it mechanically, while interrogating Dan with a glare over Serena's shoulder. Dan answers with a clueless shrug. Serena lets go of Blair and turns to him.

"I assume my mom sent you to make sure I was coming. Don't worry, you don't have to do the chaperon."

"Uh…" is the only sound that comes from Dan's mouth.

Serena holds up a hand.

"Let's not talk about that" she says, sitting at the table "You two, distract me from my problems. How was the city over the break, what did you do?"

Blair sits down slowly, trying not to look at Dan "Why?"

"What did you hear?" Dan asks

Serena glances from one to the other, frowning "Nothing…that's why I am asking"

"Well, uh, we went to see a movie…" Blair says, unsure of what to tell next.

"Really?" Serena has a smug smile "Does it mean I am exempted of things with subtitles for the rest of my life?"

Dan has a nervous laugh. He is almost sweating.

"I knew you there could be advantages as to the two of you being friends" Serena says, standing up "I am going to lie down for a moment, feel free to leave Dan."

She kisses Blair on the cheek, before making her way up the stairs.

Dan and Blair stare at each other.

"Well" Blair clears a throat "That's something."

X

It turns out that the only person who knows Dan and Blair were together in Europe is Rufus. Blair's mother never asked, Blair's father never told.

It scares Dan more than anything. Because it would mean that they are either fortunate that Gossip Girl was never sent any tip, or that she knows, and waits the right moment for striking. It also means that whether Gossip Girl knows or not, they have to tell Serena themselves now. If Dan were honest, he would admit that he almost hoped a picture of him and Blair getting out of the Jet had ended up on the internet, so the dirty work would have already been out of the question. He knows Blair probably feels the same.

He keeps making plans in his head about telling Serena. He wonders if she would rather hear it from him, from Blair or from both of them.

In the end, Dan knows that none of the options are ideal. It will always lead up to a feud between Serena and Blair; any mature and immediate acceptance is out of the question. It makes him a little sick to know that he is going to be the cause of it. If anyone had told him, when he was seventeen, Dan would have never believed it.

What makes the situation harder, is that neither he or Blair can seem to bring themselves to talk about it. Which is a first, because talking is their main activity. Perhaps their conversations involve more bickering than talking, but it's still quite unbelievable that no one ever brings the subject. It just emphasizes the giant Serena cloud over their heads.

When they can finally talk about it, they decide that they should wait, because now is hardly the time for Serena, with her quest to the forged affidavit and everything that involves Lily and makes Dan and Eric avoid their parents' penthouse as much as they can.

Dan decides to focus on his internship search, and agrees to help Nate with his. So one afternoon, while Blair, who is still undecided on the matter, is shamelessly maxing out her credit card somewhere, Dan ends up sitting in his living room and staring at Nate and Vanessa's PDA.

"I don't think Vanessa Abrams offers an internship, dude"

Nate and Vanessa break it off, and turn to him with a smile.

"Sorry" Nate says "So we were saying that my options are…?"

Dan sighs "Call your grandfather"

"Next"

"I'm sorry, but your grades aren't just good enough for an investment firm" Dan glances at Nate's report card "The only subject you're acing are Sociology and surprisingly Art History. So you can either apply for the Met, or for the Museum of Ethnology."

Nate thinks for a while "Are the employees hot at The Met?"

When Vanessa hits him, outraged, he laughs and dives in for another kiss. Dan rolls his eyes.

"What are you applying for, Vanessa?" he asks, hoping to separate them.

Vanessa pushes Nate away.

"A local news channel" she says "And there is something I need to ask you"

Vanessa is smiling a bit too sweetly, and biting her lower lip and Dan braces himself. He cannot play the sexually confused artist in one of her short films again. He can barely bring himself to think about that experience.

"I just cannot live in the NYU dorms anymore" she says "It's loud, I can't hear myself think, and the lightning is really bad for my creativity. So I was wondering if I could crash here, until I find someplace else"

Dan sighs, relieved "Yeah, sure no problem"

He sees Nate and Vanessa looking at each other warily. He doesn't like to be out of whatever psychic conversation they are having.

"What is it?" he asks, dry.

"Well, you know where I would be sleeping right?" Vanessa asks, in a soft voice.

Then it hits Dan. He turns around to look at the closed door, the one he never opens anymore. He tries to look relaxed when he turns back to Nate and Vanessa.

"Sure" he shrugs, looking down at some paper "I'll just have to move around a few things, put them down in the storage"

"Or…you could sell it" Nate says

Dan looks up at them. They are staring at him as if he is ill of something incurable.

"I'm feeling ambushed"

Vanessa shakes her head "No, not at all. It's just that we were talking about possible places for me to stay and…we realized it, that's all"

Dan shifts uncomfortably on the floor. He doesn't know why, he is not ready yet. The stupid pacifier is still in his school bag.

Vanessa stands up "Screw the internships. You're right, you don't have to do anything right away" she walks toward the room "But we are still moving it to the storage, because I am not sleeping in a crib"

"We'll go get a beer after" Nate stands up to, and offers a hand to Dan.

Dan takes it, reluctantly. Vanessa stands in front of the room until he opens it. It's the middle of the day, but it looks darker than the rest of the loft. It feels strange to come in it, and not hear a gargle or a cry.

Vanessa doesn't do much, just watches the boys struggle with the crib. She deigns open them the front door, and then the storage door in the basement. Then she puts the remaining stuffed animals next to Jenny's old ones. When it's all over, Dan manages to voice out that he dreads seeing the room empty again, so the rest of the afternoon is them moving Vanessa in.

Blair meets them at the NYU dorms, hands full of shopping bags. Once they explain to her the situation, she doesn't dare look at Dan. One of the things she learned in France, is that he tells everything with his eyes and she also learned how to read it. She wouldn't know how to handle seeing sadness in it.

So she takes out her cellphone, works her mother's connections to hire movers.

It's around nine in the evening when everything is done. They order pizzas and play scrabble until Nate calls the night. Vanessa walks him downstairs while Dan goes to his room silently. Blair assumes he is going to come back, but when he doesn't, she joins him.

Dan is sitting on his bed, looking down at the pacifier. He doesn't move when he hears Blair come in. She sits next to him, and rests her cheek against his shoulder. They stay this way until Dan moves to put the pacifier on the nightstand with a sigh, and brings her to sit onto his lap. Blair instantly wraps her arms around him, hoping to take away a piece of his sorrow.

She looks up and taps on his shoulder.

"He looks good up there" she whispers.

Dan looks up with her, to see that Vanessa put Cedric back into his place, between Salinger and Oscar Wilde. It makes him smile.

"He does" he nods, before kissing her on the cheek.

X

The day Dan has an interview with the publishers he is trying to score for his internship, he feels tensed, worked up. Probably because of all the coffee he ingurgitates.

He and Blair are kidding themselves, there will never be a right time to tell Serena, and Dan decides that the sooner the better. He calls her to say he has something to tell her, and Serena asks him to meet her at the penthouse.

When Dan arrives, he finds Blair in her living room, with a board and minions. She stretches her eyes when she sees him.

"What are you doing here, I thought you had an interview?" she asks, voice low and pressuring.

"We need to tell Serena about the holidays" Dan says.

Blair sees from the corner of her eyes Penelope eavesdropping.

"You mean how we went together to one movie, on one lonely holiday break?"

Dan glances quickly at Penelope.

"Sure, whatever. Bottom line is, I'm here to see Serena"

Blair presses her lips, annoyed. She wants to tell him that it's not the right time for her, but she knows he won't listen. She can see how worked up he is.

"She's not here to see you. She's off scheming with Chuck, disguises are involved"

Dan sighs "Well, I'll wait for her. She knows I have an interview to get to" his eyes fall on the board behind Blair.

He can't help laughing when he sees that Blair finally decided on the Forbes number six most powerful woman.

"You do know that powerful woman isn't actually a career, right?"

"Neither is Serena Van der Woodsen" Blair takes him by the arm, and brings him with her to the kitchen "Look, I know you're worried, but we all have bigger things on our plate right now. We both need to think about how academic future, before facing Serena's wrath. I'll bet you ten bucks that you'll miss your interview waiting for her"

"Blair, it's final, I'm telling Serena today" Dan says firmly "And ten buck that whatever hair-brained scheme you're cooking up blows up in your face, as per usual"

Blair crosses her arms. Why is she even bothering?

"Fine. If that's how you want to play it, loitering lounge is upstairs"

"Already there, sister"

He moves to get out of the kitchen. Blair curses herself silently, and stops him, taking his hand.

"Wait" she says "I know that you're doing this so we can be together, for real and…just, thank you"

Dan nods, and presses her hand back.

"Whatever happens, movie tonight?" he asks with a smile.

"I'll choose this time"

Dan leans down to press a quick kiss on her lips.

"You choose all the time"

He leaves and Blair takes a moment to collect herself before going back to the living room. She forgets about Serena as soon as she sees her mother walk in.

Dan waits, and waits, and even starts reading _Big Girls Don't Cry_, but Serena never arrives. He waits until Blair comes into the room, coat in hand.

"You're leaving. Now" she tells him.

"Have you heard from her?"

"No, and frankly, I don't care" Blair snaps her fingers urgently until he stands up "I refuse you jeopardizing your future for this. Serena clearly doesn't think your time is as valuable as hers. Go"

She pushes him all the way to the exit, says something about how she doesn't want Brooklyn germs in her house when they pass in front of her minions. It makes Dan smile in spite of him. When he is in the elevator, Blair even pushes the button for him.

"You're having a lot of fun with this secret relationship aren't you?" he teases

"Try to get the job. I won't be seen with someone working at a low price library in Queens"

X

The interview goes as well as Dan would have hoped, although he does arrive five minutes late. When he leaves the publishing house, he turns on his phone to see he has several missed calls, and all from Serena.

"Shit"

In his head, it can only mean one thing. She bumped into Blair, who told her. He fidgets on the streets, earning suspicious glares from walkers before he decides to call back. Every time he hears the tone, his chest gets heavier.

"Dan, I'm sorry I wasn't there today, but I need you to help me with something" Serena blurts out.

She doesn't seem mad. Dan clears his throat.

"What is it?"

"It's something with my mom. I can't explain everything, but can you meet me at this party I'm going to? I'll text you the address"

"Okay" Dan says "But we'll talk after that"

"Yes, I promise"

Serena hangs up before he can say anything else. Dan hails for a cab and hops into it, giving the address. He's just arrived when he spots Lily talking with Eric. He tries to walk as far as he can from them, but Lily sees him.

"What are you doing here, Dan?" she asks.

"Uh…I was…"

Dan knows he is probably not supposed to tell her he is there to see Serena, but Lily reads it on his confusion.

"When you find Serena" she tells him "Please tell her to stop whatever she is planning on doing before she destroys our family"

When Lily leaves, Dan turns to Eric for explanations.

"My mom is the reason why Serena couldn't find the judge during the holidays" Eric says.

Dan nods, and sighs deeply. He really hates the Upper East Side, sometimes. When he finally finds Serena, she is with Chuck. Dan's stomach drops again. He wonders if Chuck is telling her what he knows about him and Blair. But when he gets closer, he can hear that the subject is still the forged affidavit. He decides to cut in.

"Serena, we need to talk"

Chuck turns to him. They have a little stare contest. Then Chuck says he has somewhere else he needs to be, and leaves.

Dan tries to convince Serena that despise Lily's actions being less than charitable, going to the press won't solve anything. Serena won't have any of it, persuaded to be the defender of justice with her plan, and Dan gets more annoyed than he would have thought. He takes the affidavit and gives her a final ultimatum. Either she walks out with him, either she stays, talks to the journalist and lives with the consequences. He really expects Serena to choose the latter, because they both know facing consequences are not her strongest asset.

But Serena reaches to take back the affidavit, and Dan makes sure he hands her the wrong manila envelope. She might think she is ready to take the risk, but she clearly doesn't realize that she is dragging the whole family with him.

Dan plans to leave as fast as he can, but on top of everything else, they can't find his coat.

X

All Blair wants is to go home, take a bath and choose the most girly movie she can think of to torture Dan. She heads to the coat room, and is surprised to find him sitting there, a worried frown on his face.

"Did you talk to Serena?" she asks, sitting next to him.

Dan has half a smile when he sees her "No. You were right, she is not ready to hear anything I have to say to her. I don't think she'll ever be"

Blair nods, relieved that they can put the drama on standby for a little while. Dan looks at her with intent.

"So it doesn't take a genius to understand that your scheme did fail" he says.

Blair doesn't answer, and Dan nudges her to tease her.

"You know you owe me ten"

"Serena disappointed you twice today, so you owe me twenty" Blair holds up her ticket "Coat checker!" she almost yells.

Dan shifts closer to her "What's wrong? It's not the coat"

Blair prepares to tell him that there is nothing wrong, because she doesn't want to admit yet he was right. But he is looking at her, encouraging and caring, and she hears herself telling him about her insecurities before she realizes it. Blair expects him to tell her she's crazy, and he does. Dan's hand strokes her bare back gently. People can see, but Blair doesn't care.

"Blair, you care about fashion more than anyone about anything. Remember when you took me shopping for the Royal Ball, when we were in Paris?" he whispers "Well, when I looked at myself in the mirror, I couldn't believe what you had done with me. I remember thinking that you were some kind of dictator of taste. Why deny that, just because it's what your mother does?"

The coat checker comes and hands Dan his coat and bag. Dan takes Blair's ticket and hands it to her.

"Here, can you take care of my girlfriend's coat please?" he asks.

When he turns back to Blair, she is frowning and smiling at the same time. He laughs.

"Don't worry, it felt really weird to say it too"

X

Dan doesn't let her choose the movie. He takes her home so she can change and refuses to tell her what he has planned for them.

He is waiting for her downstairs when Serena comes in. He is surprised to see her smile.

"You've become quite the evil genius since you started hanging out with Blair"

Dan really doesn't know what to answer to that. Fortunately, Serena keeps talking.

"I would say I'm sorry, but it just sounds inadequate" she says "I just…I can barely sleep, thinking that someone has spent almost five years in prison because of me"

"I understand" Dan says "I really do"

Serena nods "What are doing here?"

Dan has no time to answer, because Blair is coming down the stairs, rambling about how she is not in the mood for anything German. She stops when she sees Serena.

"Oh God, another movie?" Serena asks "I would come with you, but _I_ am not in the mood for not having actual fun. Goodnight"

She goes up to her room after whispering a last "thank you" to Dan.

Where Dan takes Blair, is Time Square. She is horrified, because it is crowded with tourists eating hot dogs and sports fans stinking like beer.

"Are you trying to kill me?" Blair murders Dan with her eyes.

He laughs "I felt nostalgic about Paris"

"So you took me to the most American place in New York?"

Dan stops her, and takes her in his arms.

"Look at all the lights" he says "Look up"

Blair does, after a few seconds. It is quite amazing. She hardly ever goes to Time Square, it's not really her territory. But with Dan's arms around her, it does feel nice.

"This is New York" he whispers "This is where we met, and this is where we are. I like France with you, it feels like a dream. But being here, with you and this way, it feels better. Because I know it's real"

Blair looks up to him, biting her lip.

"You are awfully cute"

Dan laughs. She doesn't like it when he releases her to hail a cab.

He takes her to the Walter Reed Theatre next, because _Mr. Hulot's Holiday_ is showing. Blair thinks about how she used that movie to trick him into scheming against Chuck and Eva, and how the second time they planned to watch it ended with their first kiss in New York.

It all feels so long ago.

After the movie, they order sushi that they eat on the steps of the Met. Blair smiles the whole time, just like she used to when they were together in Lyon.

It is New York, she thinks, and it does feel amazing.

X

Blair is busy in her mother's office faxing her resumes to W Magazine when Serena comes in.

"Whatever it is, you better make this quick" she tells her.

"Okay" Serena says before taking a deep, long breath "Nate and Dan wanted to hang out, but they can't do it at The Empire because Dan doesn't want to see Chuck, and he also doesn't want to stay at the loft because apparently Vanessa is burning herbal candles that smell like, quote 'pig butt', so I invited them here, then Vanessa got vexed they would hang out without her just because, quote again she is actually trying to make the loft lady suitable, so she is coming too; also they all wanted to stop to pick up some pizzas on the way but none of them agreed on the place, so there are three twenty-year old on edge and hungry that will be here soon, and Dorota is gone and I can't cook and I can't imagine you wanting to"

Blair sighs. She hates them all.

"Humphrey will do the cooking, since all of this started with him" she says "Now, don't disturb me until they arrive"

"Got it"

Serena gets out of the study, right as the home phone starts to ring.

"I'll get it!" Blair hears her shout.

"If it's for me, I'm busy!" Blair replies.

When all the faxing is over, she cracks her sore neck and goes to her bedroom. She is not in the mood for socializing, trying to be civil with Abrams and pretend in front of Serena that she and Dan are nothing more than good friends.

Her door opens, and she turns around, annoyed.

"Ever heard of knocking?" she snaps.

Serena is at the door. She has her lips pressed, and the house phone in her hand.

"Blair, that was your father" she says.

Blair's breath gets trapped in her lungs. She considers asking what he wanted, to brush off any suspicions, but she can see on Serena's face that it would be completely pointless.

"He said that Handsome took a shirt Dan forgot as his favorite toy" Serena says, probably to see Blair's reaction to that.

Blair doesn't say anything. She just waits. Serena isn't an idiot, and Blair just waits for her to explode.

"When?" Serena asks, crossing her arms.

Blair realizes the answer is much more complicated than she thought. There was the kiss, in Paris. There were the few weeks before her birthday. Then the days after Serena got committed to Ostroff.

"The night after Chuck's charity" she says, deciding to pinpoint the middle.

Serena's eyes widen in outrage "After he broke up with me? Blair, are you serious, right now?"

"It didn't really start there" Blair blurts out, trying to find the way of smoothing things "It's just that when we were in Paris, we realized that we could have a real connection"

"Oh, so you mean when he was with me"

"No, not back then" Blair shakes her head "Besides, you told me yourself when we got back in New York that you guys weren't really together"

"So it gave you the right to just take him?"

"More than you when you had sex with Nate"

Blair didn't intend to say that. It actually left her mouth without her consent. But this whole time, she knows this is exactly what she's been thinking, to wear off the guilt. That she isn't doing anything Serena hasn't done before, that she is actually doing less.

Serena shakes her head "You're telling me that you are willing to break his heart, to get back at me"

"That's not at all what I'm telling you. I am telling you that Dan and I are together, and that you would be a hypocrite to give me shit about it"

Everything she is saying is true, but when she sees Serena tearing up, Blair feels like there is a stone in her stomach. Serena shakes her head again, and goes to her room. Blair hesitates before following her, knowing too well what she is about to do.

Sure enough, she finds Serena throwing angrily clothes into her Louis Vuitton travelling bag.

"Where are you going?" Blair asks with a tired sigh "You fought with your mother, remember?"

"I'll check into a hotel, then" Serena says "But I don't want to be around you"

That last sentence stings, and puts Blair into a guilty trance. She snaps out of it at the sound of Serena zipping violently her bag shut.

"Serena, we need to talk about this" Blair tries to block her way to the door.

Serena goes through the bathroom, and leaves by Blair's room. Blair still follows her downstairs. She is horrified when she sees Dan, Nate and Vanessa coming in. Serena freezes at the bottom of the stairs at the sight of them.

Dan looks at them both, first surprised. Then he understands. Serena drops her bag and walks to shove him with both of her hands.

"Why did it have to be her?" she asks, and Dan can only step backwards again. "You had to take her too? You didn't take enough, is that it?"

"Serena, please calm down" Nate interposes, but Serena pushes him aside.

"Nate chose you over me" Serena points at Dan "My mom whishes _you_ were her child, even Eric…Blair was the only one I had and you…"

She trails off with a sob. She turns to take her bag, and calls the elevator. What she said was the last thing Blair would have imagined hearing from Serena. But Blair knows the feeling, and decides to try again, one last time.

"Serena, please don't go"

"You lied to me" Serena sobs, getting into the opening elevator "And I hate you for that, you know. I really do"

The elevator closes, and Blair seems tetanized in front of it. Nate and Vanessa go discreetly to the kitchen. Dan puts a careful hand on Blair's back.

"She doesn't mean it. She is angry" he tells her.

"I know" Blair says, her voice a bit broken.

Dan is relieved she isn't shutting him out, and he goes on "And she seems to be dealing with much more than the shock of us being together"

"The problem isn't there, Dan. The problem is she had to tell me, so I would see it" Blair starts going up the stairs "Go home. I'll see you tomorrow"

X

Dan goes back to the loft with Nate and Vanessa who agreed on his pizza place, hoping it would cheer him up. It doesn't, but Dan is grateful anyway. When they both go to bed in Vanessa's room, Dan sits in front of his computer. He gets meaner upon Sabrina's character that he has ever been, hoping to perform some sort of catharsis. When his eyes get sore, he closes his computer without saving and goes to bed.

He is scared that Blair is going to back off, and break up with him, for the sake of her relationship with Serena. He is scared that everything Serena accused him of is true, and that he took things from her without even realizing, like they all witnessed her do with Blair all these years.

His phone rings a little after midnight, and he braces himself when he see Blair's number.

"Hello?"

"Why is the door locked?" Blair's annoyed voice asks.

He hears someone banging on the front door of the loft, and hangs up. He runs out of his room so she won't wake up Nate and Vanessa.

"Sorry" he whispers when he opens "Vanessa doesn't feel safe when it's not locked"

"Take back her key, and make her use the fire escape" Blair says a bit loudly toward Vanessa's room.

Dan puts a hand on her mouth, and brings her to his room. He closes the door while she takes off her coat. She is wearing her pajamas, and it makes Dan smile.

They lie together under his covers, their legs linked and his arms around her.

"I felt blue" Blair confesses "And I am sick of being alone when I feel like that"

"I already told you Brooklyn is your safe place"

She stays silent. Dan assumes she is trying to fall asleep, so he closes his eyes.

"I think she'll get around the idea" Blair whispers "Once she sees us together. Really together"

"Mmh"

"Or it'll only make things worse"

"It's going to be okay, Blair" Dan says softly.

Blair wants to believe it, but she finds it hard to. She pinches him.

"I'm not tired, don't fall asleep"

Dan opens his eyes to look at her. She is eying him defiantly. He rolls his eyes and leaves her body to turn on his other side, his back facing her. He feels her leg wrap around his hip and she starts tugging his ear.

"Don't sleep, Humphrey" she says "Let's do things"

Her hand slips under his shirt, and starts roaming on his chest.

"I'm too tired, and Nate and Vanessa can hear us" Dan protests, but doesn't stop her hand.

"We'll be quiet then"

"Nate told me once you can't be quiet"

"We need new friends" her hand stops moving.

After a few seconds, Dan turns again to take her back in his arms. She can see he is falling asleep. But she is not ready yet.

"Tell me something about you I don't know" Blair asks.

Dan groans "I hate when my girlfriend won't let me sleep"

Blair pinches him again, and he hisses.

"You know, I might start actually liking you doing that"

"I'm taking note" Blair tells him suggestively.

Dan laughs and opens his eyes "Once, when I was five, I broke my mom's favorite vase playing the explorer in African jungle, and told her it was Jenny"

"Despicable" Blair shakes her head.

"You tell me something, now"

Blair thinks for a moment "I had a cat, when I was little, but I gave it away because I found its hair didn't match the color of my room"

"Oh my God, Blair" Dan says, genuinely shocked.

They laugh together, before Dan asks if he is allowed to sleep and Blair grants him.

When she wakes up the following morning, Dan isn't in bed anymore and there is noise outside the room. She gets out, finding them all in the kitchen. Dan is making waffles, Vanessa is making a fruit salad and Nate failing to make coffee.

She sits at the bar, her eyelids still heavy from sleep. All of their voices sound loud in her tired head, but she forgets it when Dan comes to kiss her good morning.

He makes her sit on his lap at the table and they eat from the same plate, ignoring Nate calling them savages just to tease Blair until Vanessa puts whipped cream on his nose. As she puts a raisin in Dan's mouth, Blair decides that she is going to believe him.

Everything is going to be okay.

* * *

_Do you still feel the same vibe as with La Bohème? I tried to make it a bit the same, but the general theme is different, Dan and Blair are together now._

_Anyway, tell me what you think._

_Love! xo_


	2. Chapter 2

_Hi lovelies! Prepare for author rambling._

_I am really glad to see that most of you are back for this fic! I really hope it doesn't disappoint, compared to La Bohème. I don't actually remember if I answered the reviews for the previous chapter, so if I didn't, I'm sorry. Just know that I read and appreciate every single one of them. I really like how everyone has a different take on what is happening, and what's going to happen, it is really endearing._

_Now, there is just one thing I should say. A lot of you are surprised of Vanessa's role in this story, but mostly pleasantly but it's good. But it's happening because I changed the storyline. She reconciled with Dan because he told her about Milo, therefore she wasn't mad anymore at Serena, therefore she didn't enlist Juliet's plan, therefore she didn't leave the city._

_It's also why the Dair at W arc won't really happen in this story. Because Serena was the reason why he missed his interview with the publishing house. But if you remember, in the last chapter, Blair convinced him to drop anything Serena related and go to the interview, and we all know this talented boy can get anything._

_I hope you're not too disappointed about that change, but I really couldn't find a way to write it without some enormous plot twist. Besides, I think it serves the characteristic that Dan and Blair are good for each other in every sense._

_Okay, I'm done now, sorry for that. And have a good reading!_

* * *

When Lonely Boy is spotted coming in and out of Blair's building, and S is spotted coming in and out of a hotel the same week, it doesn't take long for Gossip Girl to understand what is actually going on.

She makes a snarky post about the 'B' in 'Queen B' now standing for 'Brooklyn', that Blair and Dan ignore. Their phones keep ringing after the blast; Jenny sends one tremendously long text with lots of "fuck" in it; Penelope begs Blair to confirm it's true, hoping it would distract the Upper East Side from her parents' divorce. They don't give much attention to the response of people. The only annoying thing coming out from the blast is Nate who started to call her '_Brooklyn'_.

Serena doesn't call, doesn't even give signs that she is alive. She shuts everyone out, even Nate and Eric.

Everyone starts their internships and get lost in it. Blair is without any doubt the most hardworking of them all, but none of them have a psychotic lifeless boss. The internship is a good distraction for everything Serena related, and Blair is grateful at least for that**. **She is also grateful when after a long day, she finds Dan waiting for her in her living room, with a movie and some take out.

He usually lets her do her thing, and get the rest she needs to be completely operational during the day. This is why Blair is surprised and more than worried when the night doorman calls into the room to tell her Dan Humphrey is visiting, at three in the morning.

Blair instantly goes down to her foyer to wait for him.

The elevator doors open, and Blair sees Dan standing inside. His eyes are red and he is looking at her like he doesn't even see her.

"Dan, what's going on?" she asks "Did something happen?"

The sound of her voice startles him, and then, he seems to realize where he is. He smiles lazily at her, taking one careful step forward to get out of the elevator.

"Heey, baby" he whispers.

Blair cringes. He never calls her that. When he leans down to kiss her, Blair steps away, repulsed by the smell. Dan catches himself to the wall just in time.

"Humphrey, are you drunk?" Blair asks.

Dan turns to her, putting his hands on his hips "Whaaaat? Nooooo!" he says, before restraining a hiccup "Nate…on the other hand, is like, waaaaaasted. Like he couldn't even stand"

Blair sighs and takes his arms to lead him upstairs.

"Mmh"

"So you know" Dan talks slowly because he also has to concentrate on not tripping in the stairs "I did the responsible thing and..." –hiccup –"I took him home. But then I was too far from Brooklyn, so I was like 'maaan, this is going to be tough', and then I remembered that I have a beautiful girlfriend who is rich and mean"

"Beautiful, rich and mean" Blair smiles, bringing him into her room "You just get me"

She makes him sit on her bed, helping him out of his coat and sweatshirt. Dan lets her do without complaining, just comments the books he can see on her shelf. Making him stand up to get rid of his pants and shoes is much more of a challenge, but Dan does end up in his boxers, socks and undershirt.

"I'll get you an aspirin, so it won't be too hard tomorrow" Blair says.

Dan stops her when she starts moving away, putting his hands on her waist and bringing her back between his legs. He seems to want to say something, but he just presses his forehead against her chest in the end.

"If you puke on me, we are done, Humphrey" Blair warns.

She hears him take a deep breath and wonders if he is in fact about throw up. She is startled by his hands sliding down to the back of her thighs, and going back up to slip under her negligee and settle on her bottom.

"Humphrey, what are you doing?" she asks, her breath short.

"Touching you" he mumbles against her stomach

He ducks up his head to start kissing the skin accessible above the tissue of her nightgown. Blair closes her eyes.

"You're drunk" she says, but she lets him bring her to sit onto his lap, her legs straddling him.

"Let's do things" is his answer.

"In five minutes, you'll be asleep"

"That's usually how long it takes me" Dan whispers against her neck.

"This better be a bad joke"

He laughs, and releases her, falling back onto her bed. He is falling asleep, Blair can see it. She goes to her bathroom to fetch a glass of water and an aspirin. Dan whines when she shakes him up, but takes the pill before going back to sleep.

Then she has to bring him into a more comfortable position and under her covers so he won't get cold and Dan doesn't make the slightest effort to help her. Blair convinces herself that she only did it because she wouldn't want him to get sick and contaminate her.

She switches off her lamp and slides next to him under the covers, closing her eyes. She is on the cliff of slumber, ready to fall over when she hears him snore loudly. Blair opens her eyes, and slaps him. He doesn't wake up, but he stops snoring. She goes back to sleep. He is so annoying.

X

It's no surprise that Blair is the first one to wake up. She moves around the room quietly, trying not to disturb his sleep. It's not until she looks out the window that she realizes she has to wake him up.

"Humphrey, wake up" she says, shaking him until he stirs.

Dan barely opens one eye, to look at her.

"Why do you hate me more, now that we're dating?" he asks.

"I don't" Blair replies. "And I could prove it if you would just get out of bed"

She drags the covers off him, and starts pulling on his arm to make him sit on the bed. When he does, Blair reaches to lift up his undershirt. Dan lets her do sleepily. He is however jarred awake when he sees her starting to pull her nightgown up.

Before he can see anything interesting, she walks to the bathroom.

"Follow me" she commands him.

Dan does, instantly on his feet. When he gets into the bathroom the first thing he sees is her negligee and lace panties on the floor. His breath gets trapped, and he looks up to see Blair in the bathtub, surrounded by foam and bubbles. She smiles at him.

"Good morning" she says "Care to join me?"

Dan smiles back, and shakes his head "I don't like baths"

Blair's smile disappears "What?"

"I'm sorry. I'm just one of those who think that taking a bath is just floating in your own filth"

"You're from Brooklyn, you live in your own filth" Blair snaps.

Dan crosses his arms, frowning. Blair knows he is waiting for an apology. Instead of giving it to him, she stretches one leg out of the water.

"I am naked in here, Dan" she sings.

Dan sighs, before hooking his fingers in the side of his boxers.

"Close your eyes" he says.

Blair laughs, satisfied, and does as he asks. She doesn't open them when she feels him slide in front of her, settling between her legs and resting his head against her chest.

"See" she starts wetting his hair "Isn't this nice?"

Dan shrugs. She can feel he's tensed, and she presses her fingers on his shoulders to relax him.

"Just let yourself go, okay?" she whispers in his ear "You'll be rewarded"

Dan groans and doesn't answer, but Blair does feel him relax. They stay this way for a while, Blair wetting his hair and Dan stroking her calves, while talking about their internships. Not being interrupted in this moment is a perk as to Serena moving out.

When Dan decides they've been soaking enough, he turns around between her legs to face her. He smiles as Blair interrogates him with a look, and leans down to kiss her.

"Don't" Blair says against his lips.

"You said I was going to be rewarded" Dan protests, trailing kisses along her jaw and neck.

"I wasn't talking about that" Blair closes her eyes, in spite of herself.

"Then let's just say it'll be your reward. For being pretty"

Dan grabs her waist and exchanges their position into the bath, sending water splashing on the tiles. Blair holds back a sigh when she feels him beneath her. He looks up at her, so completely unashamed and she starts feeling hot. Dan's hands urge her hips to press down against his while his mouth starts moving lower and lower on her chest. For about a second, Blair loses it. They are both naked, in a bath, the two of them clearly ready and it would be so easy to just….

She opens her eyes.

"Come on, let's go" she says, standing up to get out the bath.

Dan was going to protest, but he gets silenced by the sight of her naked, soaked body before she puts on a bathrobe.

"Chop chop!" She snaps her fingers at him

"Yeah, I'm gonna need a minute"

Blair tries not to look too smug**.** She goes to her room to dress herself. Once Dan is dressed too, Blair commands him to put on his coat and close his eyes.

"I'm not closing my eyes" he says

"Yes, you are" Blair threatens him with a glare.

"Why?"

"Just do as I say"

Dan does, and she leads him downstairs, puts two travel mugs full of hot coffee in his hands and takes him to the elevator. He asks then if he is allowed to see, but she denies him the authorization. It's not until they are outside her building that she tells him to open his eyes.

Dan blinks at the whiteness of the street.

"It snowed" he breathes out

"We're going to have breakfast in Central Park" Blair says "See, I don't hate you more. Let's go get some croissants"

They start walking and Dan just stares at her, amazed.

"How do you know?" he asked.

Blair shrugs "Junior year, I helped Serena with your Christmas present"

Dan nods, thinking back about Serena's artifact. He remembers her saying she had had helped from her elves. Little did he know that Blair Waldorf was one of them.

"Is it weird that I know that because I helped my best friend take your virginity?" Blair asks.

Dan chokes on his coffee. Nate wasn't lying when he said Serena and Blair shared everything. He passes an arm around Blair's shoulders.

"I don't care how you know it" he tells her, before pressing a kiss in her hair "I care that you remembered"

X

Blair purses her lips when she sees Dan coming in the W office. Humphrey is definitely a moron, she thinks; either for not knowing what defying her authority means, either for not understanding what "you are banished" means.

Proving herself at W was hard work, but the kind she actually wanted. She was determined to show the other interns that they were just variations on a theme, and that theme was just lesser version of her. She contemplated classic scheming and sabotage, but Dan, ever so moral, talked her out of it. So now, she has to work twice as hard.

Or at least, she had to, until Dan came by to pick her up one day on her first week. By some devious tricks, he had made everyone fall in love with him. While waiting for Blair, he proposed to make some cappuccino à la Humphrey for Epperly; then he pointed out to an intern that what she had in her hands was not the yellow Louis Vuitton Epperly had asked, but mustard Marc Jacobs. On top of everything, since he had had the common sense to let Blair dress him for his internship, he was looking more dashing than ever and the whole office was practically drooling over him.

Blair pretends that she is jealous that other girls look at him; but really, she can't stand being in a place which is supposed to be her territory, where Humphrey is actually more appreciated she is. So she banished him, to be in peace.

Dan has a little smile when he sees her.

"I know" he says "I'm not supposed to be here, but Nate and Vanessa asked me to lunch, and I won't be able to stand them without you. Also, I missed you"

He leans down to kiss her on the cheek, and Blair hears the Princeton intern sigh dreamily. It makes her want to slap him.

"I can't" she says "I am an intern, I cannot just take lunch breaks as it pleases me"

"I already asked Epperly, she said it was fine. Please?"

Blair doesn't deny that getting out of the office would be nice, for once.

"Two hours" she says, picking up her coat.

They meet Nate and Vanessa at a little restaurant in the Upper West Side. Nate is wearing a suit, and Vanessa her usual patterns and colorful designs and no couple as ever seemed more out of tune to Blair.

"How is everything going for you?" Nate asks her.

"It's hard work, but at least, I'm getting somewhere"

"Yes, I'm sure debating on Sienna Miller's new Louboutins is a lot of work" Dan smiles, remembering an argument he caught her in once with another intern, before she banished him.

Blair narrows her eyes on him "I'll have you know, mister writer, that fashion is the most powerful art there is. It's movements, designs and architecture all in once. It shows the world who we are, and who we'd like to be. Just like your scarf suggest that you'd like to sell used cars"

Vanessa, who was until then nodding to her argumentation stopped short.

"I gave him this scarf"

Blair gives her a still smile, before turning to Nate "How's the mayor's office treating you?"

"Great" Nate nods "As a matter of fact, there is a gathering for his birthday. It's something with lots of old politicians at a hotel in the Upper East Side. I have to go, but my boss said I could bring a date. I can probably get the two of you in, if you want" he points at Dan and Blair "It's on Saturday"

Before Blair can answer, Vanessa turns to Nate with a frown.

"Wait, weren't we driving up to Vermont, this week end?"

Nate frowned, then smacked his forehead.

"Right! I'm sorry, I completely forgot" he shakes his head "I have to be there, my grandfather will be too."

"What can he possibly need you for?" Vanessa crosses her arms.

Nate glances at Blair who is watching the scene with interest, and Dan who is suddenly very interested in the menu. He gets up, taking Vanessa by the arm and bringing her to a more private spot.

Blair turns to Dan "How amazing is that?"

Dan looks at her, confused.

"What, that they're fighting?" he asks.

"That they have all this drama going on, and we are simply enjoying a lunch date" Blair shrugs, before gasping and grabbing Dan's arm "Oh my God, Humphrey, it's finally happening!"

"What is?" Dan asks a bit scared.

"Four people, two couples. One couple has awful history and past, and the other is fresh and simple. We're the sans-drama couple. It's the first time it's ever happened to me"

Dan blinks several times before putting down his menu.

"There are things going on in your head that I'm not certain I fully comprehend" he tells her.

Blair rolls her eyes "We're the couple people look at and ask how they do it. The sans-drama couple"

Dan opens his mouth to ask for more precision, but he can see Blair has already dismissed the subject. So he just nods, and hums in agreement –of what, he's still not sure.

Nate and Vanessa come back, only Vanessa grabs her purse and coat, and leaves without saying goodbye. Blair comments about how rude she is being and Nate watches her go with a sigh. Dan asks Nate if he is okay, and just like a divine intervention to save Blair from listening to the tale of the most boring fight ever, her phone rings.

She prays that it's Epperly, ordering her to come back to work instantly, but it's actually Serena's name that flashes on the screen.

"Hi Blair" Serena's voice is flat and unexpressive "How are you?"

"I'm perf…I'm good, what about you?"

"Fine" Serena sighs "Listen, I want to talk to you. Can we meet at your house tomorrow afternoon?"

"Um, sure" Blair hesitates before asking "Are you coming over to take back your stuff too?"

There is a pause on the other end.

"We'll see" Serena finally says.

Blair hangs up, just as their meals are being served. Dan glances at her with a frown.

"Are you okay?"

"It was Serena" Blair answers "She wants to talk to me. And possibly move out"

"Oh"

"She's overreacting, right?" Blair asks, stabbing a piece of chicken "I mean, I get it, I'm dating your ex, but after all we've had to go through, is it really what is going to make her move out?"

"Perhaps it was kind of the final straw" Nate shrugs.

"She's immature" Blair doesn't even know why she is getting so mad.

"Listen Blair" Dan turns to her "I know that what we have going on is actually great, better than most would have expected, but it doesn't mean that we're not in the wrong. We did lie to her, and we did go behind her back. So if we want things to go back to normal, I think that we are going to have to suck it up, and just…give her everything she asks for. Unless it's us breaking up, but she wouldn't go that far, would she?"

Both Nate and Blair raise a doubtful eyebrow.

"The point is, if she wants a written apology, you write it to her" Dan says "Be the mature one, and she'll get to that point, eventually"

"And no bitch-slapping" Nate points at Blair.

Dan frowns at him "What?"

"Trust me, I've known my whole life" Nate tells him "Did you hear me, Blair?"

Blair sighs, looking up "Fine. No bitch-slapping"

X

Serena said she would be there at 4:00 pm, and she is, and it's the first time Blair has ever seen her punctual to something.

"So, how have you been?"

Serena starts nodding, then shakes her head.

"Miserable. Ben got out of jail, but refuses to see me, my mother is still evil and Eric started hanging out with Damien Dalgaard"

"Really? I didn't even know he was still in the city"

"He hasn't left since two people gave him a ride back here, before the holidays"

Serena gives Blair a pointed look. Blair just sips on her tea.

"I got the internship at W" Blair says. "And, hum…I really missed you, S"

"I tried not to miss you" Serena replies "But only because every time I would allow myself to, I would remember why I have to miss you"

"And why is that?" Blair asks, a bit cross.

Serena blinks "You've been sleeping with my ex-boyfriend behind my back, Blair"

"I was not sleeping with Dan" Blair puts down her cup "In fact, we haven't even had sex yet"

"Right" Serena snorts.

"It might come as a shock to you, but sex isn't the only way to interact with a man"

Serena frowns in indignation, and Blair curses herself. This is not being mature and taking the high road, just like Dan told her to.

"I'm sorry" she says quickly "I was out of line. But as I told you, Dan and I have a real connection. And so do you and I. I believe it's possible to make the two of them work, in my life, but I can't do it if you won't let me"

"Blair, can I be honest with you?"

"Please"

Serena puts down her cup too "I don't think I can be happy for the two of you. Now. If you promise me that one day I'll get over it, I can take the chance and see what happens. But right now, I don't think that I can be remotely glad about that."

"I can work with that" Blair says "Just move back here, and see that nothing's changed between you and me. We've been in this for seventeen years, we can't give up on it now"

Serena seems tendered. She crosses her arms, however.

"I'll move back in, on one condition"

Blair braces herself "Name it"

"Dan can never be here. Not until I say it's okay for him to be"

Blair's first instinct is to throw Serena out. But then, that would be playing into her game. She probably just wants to be sure that Blair would still do anything for her.

"Deal" Blair says "I'll let him know"

X

That afternoon, Dan is on his way home from grocery shopping when Blair calls to tell him she is coming over. He assumes it's about Serena, but he really hopes she's just ready to admit that Scorpio Rising is a great film.

He opens the door to the loft, and goes directly to the kitchen.

"Dan, you're back early!" Vanessa's voice rises behind him.

Dan turns around "Yeah, I was…"

He is silenced by the sight of Chuck Bass sitting on his couch. Vanessa, who was standing next to him, walks toward Dan.

"Don't get mad" she whispers

"What the fuck?" Dan can only see that to ask.

"He is helping me find an apartment" Vanessa said "Apparently, Nate did him a favor and this is him, paying back"

"Couldn't you meet him at his stupid hotel?"

"We had to visit some apartments in Brooklyn, then he had to show me some papers, he'll be out of here in five minutes"

"Good, because Blair is coming here in literally two minutes" Dan whispers "She's just talked to Serena, so I doubt that seeing her ex who screwed her over is something she wants"

"My ex screwed me over, and I live with him now" Vanessa says "Blair is strong, she can handle two minutes"

Dan doesn't say anything else, because replying when she's just reminded him that he used to be an ass to her is certainly not the smartest idea. He starts putting away the groceries, eying Chuck from one corner of his eyes, and the front door. He is just done when Chuck stands up, and leaves without telling him goodbye. Dan is relieved for just thirty seconds until he sees Blair coming in, frowning.

"Why was Chuck here?" she asks.

"He is helping Vanessa find an apartment"

"Oh" Blair walks toward him to kiss him hello "That's what he told me, but I didn't know if I should believe him"

She sighs, taking off her coat. Dan waves in front of her to catch her attention.

"So, how did it go?"

"Ha. It's all good. Serena is moving back in, and she loves me again"

"Really?" Dan smiles "Just like that?"

"Well she still hates you. And she said that you can't be at the penthouse until she is okay with it, but…"

"Wait what?" Dan opens his arms in outrage "You agreed to that?"

Blair frowns "Yes, but because you said that I should take the high road and give up what she wants"

"I meant like a purse, or first shift to the bathroom, not me"

"What's done is done, Humphrey. It's not like we can't see each other anywhere else"

Dan's jaw clenches, and he puts his hands on his hips. Blair can sense the tension he is irradiating, and she just knows they are about to fight. She sees behind him Vanessa coming out of her room and eying them suspiciously.

"Kiss me" Blair tells Dan "I don't want her to see us fight"

"I'm not kissing you, Blair" Dan says "I'm furious at you, right…"

The rest of his sentence is muffled by her lips that she crashes onto his as Vanessa walks by to the exit. Dan doesn't move, doesn't even close his eyes, just narrows them to still look angrily at her while Blair fakes being lost into the kiss.

Vanessa opens the door "You guys are acting weird" she says before leaving.

Dan steps away from Blair as soon as she is gone.

"Blair, this is not okay. Serena cannot dictate the rules of our relationship"

Blair rolls her eyes. She is tired of talking about relationships.

"I sacrificed a piece of our relationship for two reasons, Humphrey. First, because I think that my own relationship with Serena is worth it. Second, because, clearly we can overcome this"

It seems to calm him down. Blair takes him by the shoulders.

"What kind of a cliché lousy couple would we be if we let Serena Van der Woodsen break us?"

Dan shrugs. He mumbles about cooking dinner and starts getting busy in the kitchen. Blair stands there, kind of staring at his back. While he is cutting tomatoes, she goes to wrap her arms around him.

"I like being with you" she whispers "I'm not ready to give that up"

Dan sighs, and wipes his hands on a cloth before turning around to respond to her embrace.

"Me neither" he answers "Even if being with you means having to hear about nonsensical critiques on one of the greatest movie ever made"

So he is still stuck on Scorpio Rising.

"That drack put the 'ick' in 'esoteric'" she tells him

"And just as I thought you couldn't possibly come up with more"

Blair smiles smugly, and Dan places a kiss on the tip of her nose.

X

Coming home from his internship, Dan finds Chuck sitting on his couch with Vanessa two more times that week. And those two times, Blair arrives not long after, since they can't see each other at her place. She doesn't talk to Chuck, nor addresses him as much as a look before going to Dan's room.

Dan usually follows her. She rests on his bed, back against the wall, reading, while he sits silently behind his computer and types away. Ironically, on one of those days, Dan is working on Charlie Trout. It's the third time he's killed the character; he can never quite put his finger on which kind of death should be more suitable.

When he hears Vanessa see Chuck out, he turns to Blair. She seems completely oblivious of anything that isn't going on in her book. Dan ducks his head to see the cover. Biography of Elizabeth Taylor.

"Can I ask you something?" he asks, closing his computer.

Blair doesn't look up from her book.

"Unless you forgot how to use the English language, I don't see why not"

Dan goes to sit on the edge of the bed. He curls his fingers around her delicate ankle.

"Why Chuck?"

This time, Blair does look up. She puts down her book.

"What?"

They both know she heard right, so Dan simply shrugs and waits. Blair sighs.

"Why does it matter?" she shakes slightly her head; she doesn't seem mad "Why Serena?"

"That's not fair, I asked first"

"I'll give you an answer if you give me one first" Blair tickles him with her toes.

"We were both really full of shit" Dan grimaces "She pretended she wanted out of the Upper East Side, and I pretended I didn't want in. Or something like that"

"That's quite honest" Blair observes out loud.

"Your turn" Dan starts tracing patterns on her leg.

"I wouldn't know how not to make it last five hours" Blair says "It would be full of ridiculous contradictions, and I don't have the way with words like you do"

Dan nods. There goes his chance to try and picture the relationship Charlie and Claire could have. Blair leans forward to take his arms and pulls him toward her.

"How about I tell you why you?" she says.

Dan's head peaks up in interest.

"You are like Verlaine's poetry translated in English" she tells him "Its real beauty remains unknown until you learn the language to read it properly"

Dan lets out a silent breath. He is actually, genuinely blown away by her.

"You have a pretty good way with words" he tells her.

She kisses him in response, locking their smiles together. Dan settles between her legs and presses against her. Right now, he thinks. The moment is perfect, and he's been waiting too long; he just wants her. He tries to show her by bringing her legs around his hip. Blair gets the message and responds by toying with the hem of his sweatshirt.

Leave it to Nate to choose that moment to come in, hands full of Italian take out.

X

Vanessa finds an apartment and starts to move out progressively, with the help of Nate. Dan avoids the loft as much as he can during those moments, because they always end up fighting and asking him to pick a side. Since he can't go to Blair's for refuge, he ends up spending a lot of time at his father's.

Rufus asks a lot of questions about Blair, and Dan suspects him to be the mouth for Jenny's inquiries.

Dan and Blair make their first apparition as a couple at the Mayor's birthday. She chose his suit, made him match with her long, black dress. When Nate is busy playing nice with one of his grandfather's friend, and Dan starts talking to a journalist, Blair drifts off with a glass of champagne.

There is no one remotely interesting at that party, to the point where she is actually relieved to spot Vanessa in a green dress in a corner.

"I like your dress" Blair tells her "Did Nate get it for you?"

Because really, it's the only explanation. Vanessa nods.

"He said it matches my beautiful eyes" she mumbles.

Blair frowns. She would have imagined someone saying it with a much more enthusiastic tone.

"I really don't know what I'm doing here" Vanessa laughs, somewhat bitter.

"Supporting your boyfriend?" Blair suggests in the tone of obviousness.

"Right" Vanessa nods "That's probably why he's barely talked to me, since we arrived. His grandfather hates me. Last time, he even convinced Nate to dump me for some rich bitch"

Blair frowns, knowing too well who the 'rich bitch' in question is.

"Don't hold back" she tells Vanessa "Well, if you want my advice…"

"I didn't ask"

Blair bites her tongue "Well you should. Because if you look at Humphrey and me, then at you and Nate, it's easy to spot which one is the sans-drama couple"

Vanessa turns to Blair with a smile "You're kidding, right? Dan told me that you guys fight all the time"

Blair opens her mouth, then shuts it.

"Why would he say that?" she asks, finally "He is not supposed to say that. He is supposed to offer advice based on his healthy, functioning relationship"

"He says that it happens mostly when you're on your snobbish mood"

Blair gasps in outrage, not able to hold back.

"Well, I hope you don't like him too much" she tells Vanessa "Because he might be dead by tomorrow"

"Go nuts" Vanessa picks up another glass of champagne "In fact, you should confront him right now. He hates public scenes. And you were born for it"

"Right" Blair nods, before downing her glass "Wait, why are you taking my side?"

"Payback. He took Nate's side, this morning. Go on. Avenge me"

Blair considers smiling at her, then decides against it before going to seek for Dan. When she finds him, he is still talking with that journalist. She pokes him on the shoulder and he turns around.

"I can't believe you stabbed me in the back!"

Dan's smile disappears, and he sighs, stuffing his hands in his pockets.

"What is it, this time?" he asks "What did I do?"

"How can we be the sans-drama couple if you go around and tell every hippie who wants to hear that we fight all the time?"

"Vanessa was bummed about fighting with Nate, so I tried to reassure her"

"That's not what you're supposed to say, then! You're supposed to shove your happiness into their faces!"

Dan frowns "I didn't tell her anything that wasn't true. We do fight all the time, Blair. And I don't think that shoving my happiness in her face would have done her any good"

Blair opens her arms "Who cares about what's good for her?"

"You know what, I'm not having this fight again" Dan turns around.

Blair hits his shoulder to force his attention, but Dan doesn't turn back. However, she hears him whisper.

"You know, you hit me a lot"

"And I will continue to do so until you treat me with respect"

"What are you even talking about?" Dan asks, still not turning back.

Blair tries to force him to by pulling his shoulder, but he resists.

"Humphrey, I'm talking to you, look at me"

She starts smacking the back of his head. Dan ducks it in.

"Ouch! Stop it, people are staring!" he hisses

"You're the one who didn't mind being a not sans-drama couple"

"Oh my God!" Dan almost yells in annoyance.

He turns around to hold her wrists between his hands. Blair tries to break free from his hold, and finds that the only way to do so is to kick him in the tibia. Dan crouches down under the pain, but doesn't let go of her and since she is standing on one heel, it ends up with the both of them slipping and falling on the floor.

Even then, Dan still won't let go of her wrists so Blair keeps trying to kick him, no matter how much he begs her to stop.

"Hey!" Nate's voice is what stops them. He squats down in front of them and Blair has never seen him looking so angry "I suggest the two of you get the fuck out, before I lose my job"

"He started it" – "It's her fault" Dan and Blair defend themselves in unison.

Nate doesn't say anything, just points at the exit. Dan stands up and holds a hand out to Blair. She accepts it, and once she is up on her feet, she bats it away.

Their exit is the main focus of the party. Once they are in the hotel hall, Dan opens his arms wide.

"What the hell was that about?"

"That was you, making a fool out of me in front of everyone" Blair started to walk toward the coat room, but Dan took her wrist to stop her "Let go of me, or I swear, this heel is going to find itself somewhere very uncomfortable

"I want you to listen to me" Dan doesn't release her, but pulls her closer to the point where their noses almost touch "Your best friend is my ex, and my step sister. Your ex is my adoptive step brother who traded you for a hotel, cut your cheek and slept with my little sister. We are about the most dramatic couple that could have come out of our generation in the Upper East Side. But it's okay, because despite all of that, we want to be together. We shouldn't care about how people see our relationship, because they don't know, and if they are too stupid or stubborn to try to understand, I say fuck them, okay?"

Blair doesn't answer. She looks him in the eyes. He looks determined. She doesn't know this Dan Humphrey. She can't help selfishly imagine that perhaps he only exists for her.

"What do you say?" he asks

The power shifts when Blair yanks her wrist free, and pushes him hard against a wall. She kisses him feverishly, and Dan doesn't even think of responding, too caught off guard. When he does, he buries his hands in her hair and matches her passion. They are both a little bit breathless when she pulls away, and anchors her eyes in his.

"I say fuck me" she whispers.

Dan can't help the way his eyebrows go up.

"What?"

"You're right, we shouldn't care about others. It's only you and me in this, and me wants you, now"

"O –okay" Dan nods, licking his lip "Let's get our coats"

Blair shakes her head "Abrams is going to be back over there soon" she presses her hands on his chest "I'll book us a room here"

She kisses him again, before pulling away, leaving Dan breathless and almost trembling against the wall with a promise of being right back.

X

Even the ceiling has patterns, Dan notices. The wall frames are wooden, but painted in blue. It's a shame to cover the unique brownish color of wood just to match the walls, Dan thinks. He might become an interior designer. Although in order to do it, he would have to get out of the bed, and that isn't ever going to happen.

He keeps waiting for Blair to say something, anything, and when she finally does, it's:

"Wow"

Dan doesn't know what she means by that, but he takes it the way he would himself say it.

"Yeah, my words exactly"

Blair barely restrains herself from looking at him. He didn't understand that she meant what she didn't mean, did he? She clears her throat slightly.

"Well it was only one word"

That's it. Dan cannot take it anymore. He just wants to go to Brooklyn and never go back out until he is eighty.

"One word is all you need, really" he sighs, finally getting out of the bed.

His boxers are quickly back on him, as well as the rest of his clothes. He can hear Blair doing the same too.

"I would stay" he hears her say, and he thinks _'please, don't' _"But I have work to finish for Epperly"

"Understandable" Dan says, relieved "Internships are important"

"Actually, I'm going to be pretty busy, these days" The lie rings loudly in both of their ears, and they both ignore it "But we're going to Vanessa's housewarming, right?"

Blair could add what had just happened in the thousands of reasons why she didn't want to go, but she had promised Dan.

"Yeah, sure. Or you know, you don't have to come"

Blair freezes for two seconds. This time, she dares turn around to face him. His suit is back on.

"I want to come" she says.

It's still a lie, but the purpose of it calms down Dan a little. She still wants to be with him.

They get out of the room together, and go back downstairs to the coat room. They wait in silence, Dan's hands in his pockets, and Blair turning a pointy heel on the floor. They don't look at each other, they don't even face each other.

Once they have their coats, and are outside, Dan lifts a hand to hail a cab.

"It's okay, I would rather walk" Blair tells him.

Dan's arm goes slowly back down. He glances at her five-inch heels, the kind she always complains about at the end of the night. He looks back up, to her face and she is trying so hard to make her nervous smile convincing.

"I'll walk with you" he says, firmly.

He starts walking before she has time to dissuade him, and she follows.

Once again, they are quiet. It stresses Blair out even more because it's Humphrey, and whenever he isn't talking is never a good sign. But she can't say that she is surprised. It reassures her a bit. Surely he didn't really think that it was good. But then, she gets confused, and a bit hurt, because why isn't talking about it?

She just wants to scream.

They've been walking for three blocks when Dan cannot take it anymore.

"I've read a great review about this place" he says, pointing at a restaurant "Their signature dish is inspired by some food in Ghana. It's made of fish, and rice and spinach I think"

It's his usual, awkward rambling, but at least he is trying, Blair has to admit. So she shakes her head slowly.

"I am actually not a big fan of spinach"

Dan's head flips to the side to look at her.

"Really? Me neither" he says "My mom and Jenny, and my dad always called me a baby for not liking it, but I mean, there is absolutely nothing likable about spinach, is there? It's mushy, and it doesn't really have a taste, it mostly only goes with fish…"

Blair chuckles, interrupting his plea "You are such a weirdo"

Dan stops talking, and looks down to the pavement. Blair curses herself silently. She reaches out to take his hand in her.

"But I guess that so am I, now" she says.

She feels him relax, and then so does she. She stays hung to his arm until they are standing in front of her building.

"I'll call you" she says.

"Sure" Dan nods. He looks up before saying, sarcastic "Tell Serena I said hi"

Blair gives him a look, half amused, half scolding. She doesn't kiss him goodnight, just waves and gets inside. It's not until she is out of sight that Dan allows himself to sigh, loud and deep. What happened that night was unfortunate, and Dan knew they would be avoiding the subject as long as they could. He knew he was, at least.

The next few days were certainly not going to be easy. But then again, had he wanted easy, he wouldn't have chosen Blair Waldorf to fall for.

* * *

_Chapter 3 gets dirty you guys. Am I the only one happy about that? (I should make myself a t-shirt 'I heart Dair Smut' really)_

_Love, xo !_


	3. Chapter 3

_Hi lovelies!_

_*sigh* Writing this one has made me miss them so much. Like, I just cannot believe that they didn't end up together. Whatever, that's what fanfictions are for anyway. Hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. Second part of the chapter is dirty, I did warn you last time._

* * *

They don't see each other for two whole days. They keep busy on their own with their internship, and just casually text. Texting is fine, it's as usual. Neither of them makes plans to see the other, and neither of them complains. Vanessa has completely moved out, so it's just Dan again at the loft, ordering Chinese food. He thinks of calling Blair, but doesn't in the end. When someone knocks on the door, his heart does a little jump, because he recognizes the knock.

Blair is standing on the threshold, looking as if she hasn't been here a thousand times before. She is holding a little traveling bag in one hand.

"Hi"

Dan clears his throat, and moves aside to let her in.

"Hey" he leans down to kiss her quickly on the lips "Um, what brings you here?"

Blair gives a little shrug "Epperly has been a complete nightmare, and I just need to take my mind off things, for one night" She looks down to her feet "So I was wondering if perhaps, I could have a sleepover with you"

Dan can't help the smile he gets. He moves to take her in his arms, and it doesn't feel weird, or awkward.

"Of course, you can. Make yourself at home"

He takes her bag and brings it to his room. When the food arrives, they sit together and eat while telling the other about their days. Absolutely nothing feels different, until they decide to go to bed. Dan sits on his bed and turns his back to her while she changes into her pajamas. He pretends to be looking at some brochure that was on his nightstand. When he hears Blair slide under the covers, he starts changing too.

Then the light is off, they are both lying on their backs, staring up at the ceiling.

"Good night" he says

"Yes. Sweet dreams"

Dan decides to just stop overthinking and simply fall asleep. He wakes up early the next morning when Blair's hair tickles his nose. She shifted against him in her sleep, and his arm is around her. After a quick glance to his bedside clock, Dan runs softly his fingers on her cheek. Blair stirs a little, and Dan keeps on stroking her face until her eyelids lift up slowly.

"Wake up" he whispers "I wanna show you something"

Blair turns away from him with a groan.

"Is it payback for me waking you up the morning after your bender?" she mumbles in his mattress.

"It's not payback, but reciprocation" Dan gets out of the bed "Come on, get up. You don't even have to take your pajamas off"

It takes Blair a few seconds to sit up. Dan lifts the garage door and finds a pair of Jenny's snow boots in the other room. He makes Blair put them on before dressing her into her coat over her pajamas and one of his own scarves.

When he too is dressed against the cold, he drags a sleepy Blair by the hand out of the loft. She is half aware that she is walking in the streets of Williamsburg in her pajamas and that the sun has barely risen. Blair actually sleepwalks, and lets Dan take her wherever he wishes.

He stops in front of a bakery, and knocks.

"I don't think it's open yet, Humphrey" Blair mumbles.

"It's not, but this is a French bakery. They wake up early so people can have fresh baguette before they go to work"

Blair nods. When a woman comes to open them, Dan introduces himself as Jenny's brother. The woman smiles, and lets them in. She leads them to the baking atelier, and had she been completely awake, Blair would have been really confused.

"Jenny used to have insomnia" Dan explains "So she would go for walks early in the morning. One day, she woke us all up to show us this"

Dan takes Blair by the shoulders and brings her in front of an oven. He makes her lean to look through the glass and Blair sees semi-circles of dough.

"What is that?" she asks in a yawn.

"Wait for it"

After a few minutes, Blair starts wondering what she is actually waiting to see. Then she realizes the dough is lifting. The more she stares, the more it raises and in the end, she sees golden croissants that make her stomach rumble of want.

"Oh" she gets closer "This is so pretty"

"Right?" Dan smiles, leaning over her shoulder.

The baker gets the croissant out of the oven, and puts some into a bag for them. His wife comes with two to-go cups of _chocolat chaud_ that she hands to Dan. He pays for everything and he and Blair leave, with a last wave.

Back at the loft, Dan pours the cocoa into two mugs and they go back to bed with it and their bag of croissants. Blair sits on cross-legged on his bed, and smiles at him while sipping on her drink.

"That's a very good morning. Thank you"

"You're very welcome. I love those croissants"

By the time they are done eating they have to start getting ready if they want to make it to the Upper East Side on time.

Dan goes first to the shower, and when he gets out, Blair has laid out an outfit for him on his bed. When she gets out of the bathroom, already dressed, Dan is waiting for her in the kitchen with her purse and a travel mug full of coffee.

They take a cab together, and Dan gets out with her when it stops in front of the W headquarters.

"I'll see you tonight, at Vanessa's housewarming, right?" he asks.

Blair nods "Yes, I will meet you there"

Dan leans down to press a kiss on her lips. As he leans back up, their eyes lock for a second, and then Dan is kissing her again, with much more intent than the first time. He takes her by the waist and Blair wraps her arms around his neck. There is hair grabbing, tongue brushing and a slight bite of lip.

When he finally lets her go, he finds himself short of breath.

"See you tonight" he says

"Right" Blair swallows, and tries to steady her breathing.

She gets into the building, flush and a bit too hot for the weather. That was a good morning, alright.

X

Blair doesn't think of anything, really, as long as she is at the office. It's only when it's time to go home, and that she is standing in her room that she thinks about the kiss.

That was a goddamn good kiss. They were good at this, Blair knew it. Whatever happened in that hotel room was an anomaly. They would try again, and it would be great. It would be sensational.

Would it? Blair was starting to think that perhaps their chemistry was purely intellectual. Or perhaps it was the sense of the forbidden. Now that Serena knew, and that they didn't have to hide anymore, everything had lost its appeal. Blair had been down that road before, and going back there with Dan, of all people would destroy her. She knew she wouldn't be able to handle it.

"B"

Blair jumps around to look at Serena standing at her door.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you" Serena gets closer, frowning slightly "Are you okay?"

"I'm great. I was just distracted" Blair answers.

Because if she has to talk about Humphrey, it's certainly not to Serena.

"Well, I just came by to tell you that Nate invited me to Vanessa's housewarming tonight"

"Oh. Really?"

"Yes" Serena crosses her arms "But I'm not going to go"

Blair nods. She can't help the small pit of disappointment.

"And I also wanted you to know that you and Dan aren't the reason I'm not coming" Serena says "Ben asked me out on a date"

"Oh, S! That's wonderful!" Blair claps excitedly "When did you guys start talking again?"

"How about I tell you all of that while we go shopping for my outfit for tonight?"

Serena holds out a hand to Blair with a smile, and Blair takes it. On their way to Barney's, they stop at Starbucks for the most sugar-filled brew. Blair dismisses Serena's personal shopper and just require a room for them. She takes care of everything, taking in Serena's remarks and throwing in some of her own.

While Serena is trying on the third dress of the afternoon, Blair looks around, hoping to find more. Her eyes fall on a Marc Jacobs yellow skirt. She takes it and turns it around, considers it with every blouse she owns. It's a pretty skirt.

Serena gets out of the changing room.

"I like this one, but not for tonight" she says, putting the dress on the _take_ pile. She glances at the skirt Blair is holding "That might go with my white DKNY top. You know the one with the long sleeves"

"Actually, I was looking at it for me" Blair says.

Serena seems to freeze for a second.

"Really?" she asks, skeptical.

Blair nods slowly. She knows they are both thinking the same thing. This is not the kind of color, or pattern she usually wears, and she might consider it only because Dan might actually like it. But the truth is, Blair actually likes this skirt.

"Well, try it on" Serena shrugs.

Blair fiddles with it for a second before getting into a changing room. Serena is waiting outside when she's put the skirt on. She eyes Blair from head to toes, arms crossed and mouse slightly pursed.

"It looks good" she finally says.

Blair turns to a mirror. It is indeed different from anything she's ever imagined herself wearing; but one: it's still Marc Jacobs, and two: who cares? It does look good.

X

For some reason, Dan tortures himself to the depth of his soul to find the right outfit for that night. He wants to look good, because it's the first time he and Blair are going out as a couple and she didn't dictate what he is supposed to wear. But he wants to look himself, because it's still Vanessa's party, and it's still Brooklyn.

He calls Jenny for help, but she just tells him to ask his girlfriend before hanging up on him. His mom calls him back, and tells him that he shouldn't try to dress any different than he usually does and that if Blair doesn't accept it, she doesn't deserve him.

In the end, Dan sees no other option than going to Lily. She managed with his father, she can manage with him. When she is done with him, Dan is dressed as what Lily describe calls "casual chic". Whatever that means, Dan is sure Blair has said something like that before, one day when she was blabbering about fashion and he was not really listening, so he figures it's good enough.

Since he is in the UES, he calls Blair to suggest they go to the party together. To his surprise, Blair tells him she'll meet him over there, and Dan resigns to call Nate.

Nate is ready, but suggests they go out to drink beforehand. Dan finds it suspicious, because drinking is pretty much all they've planned to do at Vanessa's party, but he agrees. They go to a quiet bar, and Nate offers the first round. Dan is surprised when he asks for scotch rather than simple beers. He makes a joke, asking Chuck Bass to leave Nate's body, but Nate barely laughs. Dan gets worried, then.

"What's going on, man?"

The waitress comes back with their drinks. Nate shrugs.

"Why don't you go first?" he says "What's going on with you? You've seemed off this last couple of days."

Dan takes a sip, cringing when it passes it throat. Nate is going to talk eventually, he knows it. So he might indeed, as well go first. Dan voices out an inner worry that the feud between Blair and Jenny might one day explodes in his face. When the waitress comes to ask if they want other drinks, Dan asks her to just bring the bottle. His trust fund is getting used, tonight.

"We had sex. It was bad"

It's very out of the blue, but Nate nods in comprehension.

"Technical difficulty?" he asks.

"No, not even. It was just…inexplicably terrible" Dan takes another sip "Which is weird because we both wanted it. And we've done…other things before. I really don't know what happened"

"Perhaps you were shy" Nate shrugs, and when Dan snorts "Is it that much of a ridiculous idea?"

"It's not, I know" Dan admits reluctantly "I think that there was a part of me that was screaming that this is not the kind of things I am supposed to do with Blair Waldorf"

Nate simply nods, so Dan goes on.

"I mean, we get on really well, everything is great. I'm happier than I've been in a while with a girl but…" Dan can't help laughing, weakened by the alcohol going up "It's Blair fucking Waldorf!"

Nate giggles "I know, man. It's really weird to witness it too. But let me tell you, I got used to it way quicker than I would have imagined"

"Me too. It just comes back and hits me sometimes. Often in the voice of Jenny who claims she no longer has a brother"

Nate laughs with him "If I have one advice to give you, it's to let yourself go. You say you feel great with her, just remember that, next time"

Dan nods "Are you ready to talk yet?"

Nate's glare goes deep, deeper than Dan has ever seen it go, and he senses the conversation is about to shift mood. Nate sighs.

"I'm going to break up with Vanessa" he says.

Dan does not know what to answer to that, so he just waits for Nate to explain.

"It's not working. Ever since I started my internship at the Mayor's office, she is constantly reminded of why we ended, last time. And I just can't be in a place where I have to choose between her and my grandfather again. Not when my dad just got out of prison. I want to make my family better, and she deserves someone's entire attention, even though she pretends otherwise"

Dan understands Nate's motives, but still finds himself a little sad.

"But, you guys seem to be doing well"

"We seem to, but we're not" Nate shrugs "Sometimes I think that we naturally went back to each other because we got screwed over by the same people"

Dan does not know what to answer to that either. He just bears his shame in silent.

"I know she thinks it too. And I think she knows I'm going to end it"

A silence settles. Nate finishes his drink, and Dan mimics him.

"So…what now? Are you still coming to the party?"

Nate nods "I want to be with her tonight. At least one last time"

"And then it's over?"

Nate nods again, silently. He stands up and takes the bottle with him. Dan follows him outside, also in silence. He knows he is going to see Blair soon, but as he acknowledges the end of two of his friends as an item, he can't help but missing her a little.

X

When Blair is ready, Serena orders her to tell Dan she is going to be late, giving as an excuse that they are going to get drinks beforehand, to start the night together.

Serena brings her to a lounge bar, where everything is rectangular. When they sit at the bar, someone brings them a tray of ten vodka-strawberry shots.

"This is me making an effort" Serena says "I am going to ask you five questions about you and Dan, you are going to answer, and we'll take a shot before each"

Of course Serena making an effort would involve drinking. Blair accepts. Serena takes the first shot.

"When exactly did it start? I won't be mad"

Blair takes her shot "I gave him the romantic tour by night in Paris. Retrospectively, I don't think I would have given it to him if I didn't appreciate him at least a little"

Serena nods, and takes the second shot "You promise you guys never slept together behind my back?"

Blair empties the little glass, cringes, then shakes her head "I swear. Only kisses. Some frisky action, because we're young and healthy people, but no sex. Until two days ago"

Blair doesn't know why she added the last part, but now that it's in the air and Serena looks at her with a face devoid of expression. Then Blair thinks, screw it, she has to talk to someone about it.

"It was bad" she says "The least sexy thing since Courtney Stodden"

Serena's eyebrows go up in surprise. Blair citing Courtney Stodden is always a sign of crisis. She takes her third shot, and pushes the two remaining one toward Blair.

"Here" she says, before taking a deep breath "Tell me about it"

Blair asks with a glare if she is sure, and Serena answers with a small nod.

"I don't know what happened!" Blair takes a shot "I mean, one minute we are jumping on each other, and the next we're like just…there. No fireworks, no revelations, only someone in my head, screaming '_why are you having sex with Dan Humphrey_?'"

"Voice in your head?" Serena asks, worried.

"It was me, I think" Blair takes two shots in a row "I really like him, S. All of him. And I really want to be with him in every way. But I can't forget who he is. I wish I had met him before you, because now, everything is so complicated"

It's too late to regret saying what she just did, and Blair curses herself, waiting for a reaction. Serena doesn't walk away angrily, like she would expect. She just takes the two shots remaining in front of Blair.

"Here's the thing" she says "Forget about the past. Tell yourself it's just a prologue and that it all starts from here. That's what I'm telling myself with Ben. I mean, my mom sent him to prison"

Blair nods slowly.

"Just a prologue" she whispers. It's like a weight has been lifted "Thanks, S. You still have three questions left. At least, I think"

"I've heard enough, for tonight, perhaps some other time. Although I doubt it"

She orders two final shots. They click their glasses.

"To the future" she says.

"And to us, being forever" Blair nods.

They bring the glasses to their mouth and throw their head back at the same time.

X

Blair stumbles out of the cab and looks up at the building. Not bad for Brooklyn, she thinks. But then again, Chuck is the one who found the apartment. The lobby is little, but there is an old fashioned elevator, thank God. Whatever floor Vanessa lives on, Blair could have probably never made it up there in one piece. She is about to call Dan, and ask him the floor when she hears his voice say her name. A bit shocked, she turns around.

He is leaning against the mailboxes. His eyes are a little bit glassy, and he is smiling at her.

"Hey you" she says.

Dan gets closer, and it's probably Blair's inebriated vision, but he doesn't seem very balanced either. He leans down to kiss her, cringes, and pulls away.

"You were with Serena" he says "Vodka strawberry"

"And you drank with Nate. Scotch. It's either him or Chuck, and I really hope it's not Chuck"

Dan laughs slightly "Let's go up"

Inside the elevator, they stand next to each other and Blair's mind in pounded by Serena's drunken wisdom. The past is just a prologue. Dan on his side thinks about Nate, and how he said the way Dan feels with Blair, whether they're having great sex or not is the only thing that matters.

"Okay" Blair pulls the emergency hold.

"What are you doing?" Dan asks, worried.

"Let's talk about it?"

Dan sighs, then shakes his head, and stares at the elevator wall next to him. Blair forces him to look back at her.

"That's a very mature way to handle the situation"

Dan bats her hand away "We are not talking about it. And if it's a problem for you, well fix it, because all of this was your fault"

Blair presses her eyes shut, and opens them again.

"My fault? It was my fault that you couldn't get it up properly?"

"I could –I did get it up properly!" Dan defended, cross "It was your fault for bringing bad karma onto us. You kept talking nonsense about how we were a sans-drama couple, and then we were cursed with the worst dramatic feature. I would rather sell my sister than relive what happened in that hotel room"

"You should sell your sister, period. And don't try to make me believe that my little psychotic moment about the sans-drama couple caused you to be so terrible" Blair stabs his shoulder with her fingers repeatedly, mostly to annoy him.

"Well at least, I didn't pretend to be an expert in the matter" Dan says "All those time we were making out, and doing all these other stuff and you kept making those really attractive noises. You inception-sexed me, and planted the idea in my head that you were really, really good"

Blair gasps loudly in outrage "Okay first…how amazing was that movie?"

"Pretty amazing" Dan nods.

"Second: I am really, really good out of it too"

"I don't think so" Dan shakes his head childishly.

Blair drops her clutch on her floor and pushes Dan against the wall.

"I will prove it to you"

"What? Right here, in this elevator? Where people have to go up and down?"

"Oh, yes they do"

And then she kisses him. Dan responds, because he has no reasons not to - Blair wants to prove herself to him, and so be it –and he also because he too has something to prove. No matter what she says, he can get it up properly.

Their tongues brush while they both try to get rid of each other's coats. When it's off, and dismissed in a corner of the little elevator, Blair pulls Dan by his sweatshirt and starts attacking his neck. Dan groans in response. He swings his arms under Blair's ass to lift her and press her against the wall, causing a little delighted cry to get out of her.

Blair wraps her legs around his and starts moving her hips, up and down, so he can feel her, so she can feel him.

Dan is still kind of drunk and he has trouble figuring out how they should do this when Blair sucks behind his ear this way. He decides not to rush it too much, and brings his hands to close over one of her breast.

"Open it" he feels Blair murmurs more than he hears her.

His fingers go to work her blouse open and tug it out of her skirt. She is wearing a slip underneath, but it's easy enough to push the strap down her shoulder and leave one of her breast exposed. The peak is hardened, half from the cold, half from the excitement. When Dan leans down to take it in his mouth, Blair bristles and moans. He groans when he hears her breathe out his name, and whispers to her to say it again.

"What?" Blair asks, dazed.

"You just said my name" Dan says against her breast.

"Dan?" she repeats, canting her hips forward, delighted of how hard she finds him.

"Yes, you just said it again"

"Dan"

His hand moves between them and disappears under her skirt, pressing between her legs. He asks her to say it again, and when she does, the combination of it and how wet he can feel her is his turning point.

He makes sure Blair is steadied around his hips when his hands leave her body to undo his pants, quickly. He pushes them down halfway to his thighs before going back to hold Blair. They are both short of breath, and Blair sees him smirk slightly before his fingers push her lace panties aside, and she feels him enter her.

She instantly closes her eyes, pleased with the feeling and the way the alcohol magnifies it. Dan steps closer, and buries himself deeper inside of her. Then he starts moving slowly, sending her back slide up and down against the elevator wall. She can feel his hipbones press her thighs further apart, and his hot breath on her neck. He feels so good, pressing up and down inside of her, in a way she can barely handle. He nibbles at her skin and Blair knows there is going to be a mark tomorrow.

At this moment, so close to him in such a little space, Blair feels more liberated than ever, and she can't help saying;

"God, this is so good"

Dan chuckles "I know, right?"

He still moves so slowly that they can feel every inch of each other. Then Dan kisses Blair softly on the lips.

"Blair, I could do this for hours" he says, putting every movement on hold so she listens. He looks her in the eyes "But we are awaited upstairs. And people do need to take this elevator. So I am going to pick up the pace, and we are going to make an appearance up there so we can go back to my place and you can show me just how good you are outside my head, okay?"

Blair nods, whatever he wants just as long as he starts moving again. And so he does, his thrusts hard, and insistent. Blair bites her lip in a pointless attempt to hold back a moan. She stops trying when she feels his hand sliding between them and going to stroke her. Blair wraps a hand loosely around his wrist to feel his movement.

This is Dan, she thinks, who is making her feel this way. She forgot about proving herself to him, because he took the matter into his own hands and turned her into complete mush. And now, he is fucking her in an elevator, without any restrain, without any resolves. When the orgasm hits her, it is so violent and unexpected that she grabs his hair to support it, triggering his own. Dan's body goes stiff, and they shake against each other, both kind out shouting their release.

Afterward, Dan has a harder time to catch his breath, probably because he is still holding her. Blair strokes his back slowly; waiting for him to recover and feeling him soften inside of her. He responds by kissing her, slow and soft.

Dan eventually pulls out and puts her carefully back down on the ground. They dress back up, smiling at each other the entire time. Dan crouches down to pick up their coats, and her clutch. As he hands back her things, his eyes roam over her appreciatively.

"That's a pretty skirt" he says.

X

Vanessa greets them happily when they arrive. She apologizes for the elevator being apparently out of service. Dan tries to repress the smile he gets when he hears Blair giggle. When she asks Vanessa to show her to the bathroom, Dan is left alone, until he spots the bar. He is pouring himself and Blair drinks when he gets approached by a classmate, Charice.

"I thought it was weird you hadn't showed up yet" she smiles at him.

"Yeah, I was waiting for my girlfriend. It always takes her forever to get ready"

Dan is becoming too good at telling lies from the top of his head. Blair is rubbing off him.

"I didn't know you had a girlfriend" Charice bites the corner of her cup "Does she go to NYU?"

"She used to, but she transferred to Columbia. There she is, actually. Blair!"

He waves and Blair comes to stand next to him with a smile. Dan introduces her to Charice who recognizes her.

"We were in History together last year" she says, eying the both of them "I wouldn't have thought she was your type" she tells Dan.

Blair's eyes narrow on her while Dan smiles a bit awkwardly. He presses a hand on Blair's back to attempt to ease the annoyance he feels going up in her.

"I remember you" Blair says "You're the one who failed the final project because she confused Robespierre with Danton. Awkward"

Charice shifts from one foot to the other, looking a little ashamed and Dan feels bad for her.

"Well, if you don't mind, my boyfriend and I are going to get something to eat" Blair takes Dan by the arm "But it was nice to see you again, Janice"

She pulls Dan in a corner. He hands her one glass and teases her about being jealous. Blair rolls her eyes, and tells him to shut up. They spend most of the time together, just the two of them next to the snacks, making each other taste every bit of food and not paying attention to the other guests. Blair shows behind Dan with a tilt of her head.

"What's with the intense PDA?" she asks.

Dan turns around to see Nate and Vanessa in a corner, kissing slowly and completely oblivious of everything else. He turns back to Blair, and tells her about his conversation with Nate. He can't help being touched when he sees her a bit sad.

"He must really love her" she says, then when she sees the way Dan is looking at her "I really don't get why"

Dan laughs, and they go back to feed each other snacks.

"It's quite a nice surprise how well the Japanese whisky goes with croque-monsieurs" Blair closes her eyes in delight while she chews.

"I told you, great things grow in Brooklyn"

Blair giggles a bit, and Dan gets closer, nuzzling behind her ear.

"You are so sexy" he whispers.

"I know"

Dan laughs, and excuses himself to go wash his hands. Blair follows him because she doesn't want anyone to come and talk to her while she is alone. While Dan is washing his hands, Blair closes the bathroom door, and locks it.

Dan turns around with a frown.

"Blair. Whatever you're thinking of right now, I am against it"

"I really don't think you are"

She goes to wrap her arms around his neck, making them lean against the sink. She kisses him softly on the lips, before going down to take care of the spot on his neck that seems to drive him mad. Dan indeed groans, and puts his hands on her hips.

"Why are you doing this to me?" he asks.

Blair chuckles "I am just showing you just how good I am out of your head" She leaves his body to put down the toilet seat and makes him sit on it. Dan's brains go numb when he sees her drop on her knees before him and she whispers "Or you know. On your head"

She unbuckles his pants, and unzip his fly slowly, looking down to it and biting her lower lip; Dan is going to remember that moment for the rest of his life, he is sure of it. Again, he hears that voice telling him that Blair Waldorf going down on him in Vanessa' bathroom is not something that should be happening, but Dan tells it to just shut the fuck up.

Blair's hand wraps around him and starts stroking, up and down, slow and diligent. He looks at her. She is staring back at him with a little malicious smile, the one that he is likely to die from one day. When her head dips and she opens her mouth to close it around him, Dan just knows he isn't going to last.

He holds on as long as he can, though, because there is no way he is stopping her, stopping this. But he doesn't want to go without her, he never wants to go without her ever again. So when he feels the peak build up, he reaches out to stroke her cheek and asks her to stand up. Blair does so, and Dan's hands travel under her pretty yellow skirt to pull down her panties, rolling them over her thighs.

Blair steps out of them and lets Dan bring her above him.

"Holy shit" Dan bristles when she sinks on him and he feels her soaked from going down on him.

Blair starts moaning almost immediately, and Dan has to kiss her to muffle the sounds. He doesn't know how long they've been in the bathroom for, but Blair crying out his name would finish off every suspicion people could have outside.

She rocks her hips above him, quickly, and Dan holds a strong arm around her lower back. Their lips never separate, but Blair gets louder inside of his mouth. Their position seem to allow him to hit a spot driving her crazy inside her, so Dan surrenders all powers and lets her bring them where they long to be. He kisses her hard, feeling his own muscles tense with anticipation.

Then suddenly, Blair breaks away from his lips and throws her head back, letting out a sharp, short cry as she clenches around him. Dan doesn't need any other signal to let go, and comes apart under her, for the second time that night.

His clothes are starting to smell like sweat from not being taken off both times. Dan decides that there is no better sign that it's time to go home, and make love to Blair properly, in his bed.

Again they fix each other up, and Dan gets out of the bathroom to go get their coats while Blair is putting her underwear back on. He is struck when he sees everyone staring at him. Vanessa is fuming, and Nate is smiling.

Blair is just as shocked as him when she gets out too. Vanessa doesn't say anything, but points at the front door. Blair lifts her chin haughtily.

"Fine. I didn't want to spend my night with stuck-up Brooklynites, anyway" she says while raising an eyebrow toward Charice.

"I'm from Queens" Charice counters.

Blair opens her mouth, but Vanessa speaks first.

"Okay, at this point it's like you're begging her to destroy you" she tells Charice, and Nate nods, before she turns back to Dan and Blair "It was really nice of you to come –in every sense of the word –but now you have to go"

Blair gives her a fake smile, while Dan helps her in her coat and tries not to blush.

"Congratulations again, Vanessa" he says.

He tries to hug her, but she steps away.

"Don't touch me, now!" she exclaims in disgust "Just go, I'll see you around"

"Right, well, you place looks really lovely" he compliments awkwardly while she opens them the door.

"I liked the bathroom best" Blair says with a petty smile "Great for a good fu –"

Dan puts a hand on her mouth and leads her outside, barely hearing Nate laugh as the door slams behind them.

X

They decide to walk toward Dan's and see if they find a cab along the way. It's really cold, but they are still pretty wasted, and they snuggle up against each other. They stop twice to make out against a brick wall, and resume walking. Dan doesn't think they'll make it to the loft before dawn, at this pace.

"So Nate kicked us out of a party in the Upper East Side, and Vanessa kicked us out of a party in Brooklyn" Dan sums up the last three day with her, with a laugh "Where are we possibly going to go?"

Blair smiles and her eyes fall on an alleyway, hidden by a bamboo fence, probably the continuation of the little restaurant next to it. She pulls Dan by the hand toward it.

"Here looks pretty good" she says, with a smile.

Dan smiles too, and lets her drag him but he shakes his head.

"I can't, Blair" he says against her lips when she pushes him on the brick wall "You wore me out"

"Such a big brains, and so little stamina" she teases him "That will get you nowhere, boy"

Dan doesn't answer, he simply kisses her, long and slow.

"My brains are what allow me to find a solution to every tricky situation" he says, exchanging their position, and pressing her against the wall "And I didn't grow up with servants doing everything for me, therefore I am pretty handy"

While he speaks, his hand snakes up Blair's thigh over her stockings, until it reaches her panties. Hadn't it been winter, she wouldn't have even bothered to put them back on, before leaving Vanessa's. Blair sucks in a breath when Dan starts stroking her slowly, fingers pressing in circular motion against her. Then he dips two of them inside her, pumping quickly, wasting no time.

Blair is not going to last, not after two orgasms, Dan knows it, so he decides to make it as intense as he can for her. His thumb goes to find her clit and he presses, making Blair come with his fingers, in a dark and cold alleyway in Brooklyn.

When he pulls his fingers out of her, he hears her whisper a breathless thank you, and it makes him laugh.

"My pleasure" he says, kissing her temple.

They are lucky enough to find a cab when they leave the alleyway, and Blair starts dozing off on his shoulder in the car. He carries her on his back up to the loft, because her feet hurt. When they get inside, and she steps down from him, his whole body is sore, but he doesn't really care.

Blair starts peeling off sleepily her clothes in direction of his bedroom, and this is the last sign of just how wasted she is, to Dan. He picks up the trail behind her, and when he reaches his bed, Blair is already on it, in nothing but her slip. Dan gets undressed too, and slides them both under the covers.

He presses her body against him, enjoying how familiar her curves, the softness of her skin and the smell of her hair now feel to him.

X

Dan tries to move around in his sleep, but finds himself blocked by something over him. Someone. He opens his eyes and sees Blair sitting on top of him. She is wearing an NYU sweatshirt over her slip, and a pair of his socks. She is eating slices of canned pineapple while looking at him.

"Have you always been such a creep?" Dan asks her.

Blair shrugs and gives him half of a slice. Dan eats it, delighted by the sweet savor so early in the morning.

"You know, I've been eating much more than usual since I started dating you" she says.

"And there I was, thinking it was you who was rubbing off on me"

Dan takes the can from her hands, putting it on the nightstand before pulling her down for a kiss. She rests her forehead on his afterward.

"Last night was amazing" she says.

"Which time?" he asks with a smirk.

It makes Blair laugh "All of them. I knew you could get it up properly"

Dan shakes his head, refusing to give in to her teasing.

"How about I cook you breakfast and make you eat even more?"

He gives her a little smack on the thigh to urge her off him.

"Can you do poached eggs?" Blair asks, falling back onto the bed.

"I can" Dan starts dressing himself into a shirt and sweatpants "Also, you do whatever you want, but I'm calling in sick, today. I am sore, and hungover"

"I can't, Epperly will kill me" Blair sighs.

"Tell her I'm sick, and that you have to take care of me. She won't refuse, then"

He wriggles his eyebrows at her, and Blair rolls her eyes. She is not going to use the fact that everyone at W is basically in love with him to get out of a day of work. Dan gets out of the room, and Blair lies on the bed, eating more pineapple.

She is getting used to waking up in his bed, and there is something about the morning light in his room. She likes the way it hits the books on his shelves, and Cedric, as if they were all waking up with the sun.

Blair can see herself waking up in this room for a long time. She stands up on his bed, looks at his books –rolling her eyes at lots of them –and fiddles with Cedric. She finds a pacifier behind the doll, and sighs when she takes it between her fingers. She thinks of Serena again.

The past is just a prologue.

Blair puts swiftly everything back into place when she hears Dan's footsteps approaching the room. He seems surprised to find her standing on his bed. Blair puts her hands on her hips.

"You don't have a single E.E. Cummings. And you call yourself a writer"

Dan walks toward her, suspicious and pulls out a Cummings's poem collection out of his bedside drawer. He hands it to Blair, before taking her over one of his shoulder, caveman style. Blair tells him to let her down with a laugh.

"I called you for breakfast twice" he reprimands.

"I didn't hear, let me down!"

He does, once he arrives to the kitchen bar where he's already put down two plates of poached eggs with grilles toasts and butter. Blair licks her lips in delighted anticipation.

"You should really call in sick" Dan tells her "I have plans for us today"

Blair bites into her toast "Do any of those plans take place outside the bedroom?"

"Not really" Dan smirks into his cup of coffee "But we don't have to stay in the bedroom, if you don't want to"

He leans toward her to plant a long, wet kiss on her neck. Blair pushes him away and orders him to let her eat.

She does call in sick, in the end. Because as they go back to bed, and Dan kisses her, pressing her into the mattress, Blair finds that the outside world has never had a lesser appeal.

* * *

_Next chapter is high on drama. Introduction of Ben, return of Chuck Bass (yeah, you're not rid of him yet) and of someone else. Can you guess who? I did give a hint in this chapter._

_Love, xo._


	4. Chapter 4

_Hi loveiies ! Stuff happened and so I'm gonna be away for a while, so I thought I would post this early. _

_I told you this fanfiction was going to be a lot about frienship, and I feel like this chapter is the perfect example. Anyway, as I said, it's high on drama. But it gets so fluffly in the end, you'll see everything pink for a while after that._

_Hope you enjoy, and hope to be back really soon._

* * *

They make it one month, but it feels like yesterday to him, and like forever to her. They don't share that thought with each other, just smile. When they meet that morning, he gives her a rose while apologizing for being too cliché, and she hands him his coffee. They lean forward to kiss, and they say "Happy first month". It feels even more cliché then, and girly; a bunch of other things that make Dan wonder when he turned into a twelve year old girl. But then he thinks; who gives a fuck? He has been Blair Waldorf's boyfriend for a month and nothing, or no one can ever change that.

X

"Nate, I know this is hardly the right time for you, but I need you to sleep with my boss"

Nate stares at Blair, a sushi hanging halfway to his mouth. It takes him a few seconds before he can finally ask her to repeat. Blair does, diligently, and with a sweet smile destined to coax him.

"I have just broken up with Vanessa"

"And Epperly will be a great rebound!" Blair pours more sake into his glass "I am not asking you to marry her, you know. Just get her on her back so she can get off mine"

Nate refuses, at first. Blair points out that it's not very different than what he did with Lady Catherine, except this time he's doing it for a friend, and Nate tells her to screw herself. Blair isn't vexed; she sort of looked for it. Then Nate accepts one date, but just because he really cares about her.

"Thank you. I couldn't match her with someone in such a short notice, and I had no one else to ask"

"Yeah, yeah, I get it. I'm single and Chuck is perfectly happy with Raina, how fucking ironic"

Blair tilts her head to the side. Raina Thorpe? She never heard about that.

"The girl who is trying to steal his company? The one whose father hired yours as a spy against Chuck? That Raina?"

Nate grunts in affirmation, stuffing his mouth with sushi.

"What is he thinking?"

"I don't know, I think he's in love. He is building her some room for Valentine's day"

Oh isn't that just fucking perfect. Blair pours sake into her glass this time.

"Well. I wish her good luck" she says before drinking.

She can see that Nate is having a hard time handling the whole break up thing, so she suggests they go back to her place after lunch and hang out. Dan is busy at his internship anyway, and Serena will probably be there. She and Blair will probably make him do girls stuff, like eating ice creams while watching reruns of Clueless or Sex and The City. And it'll feel like they are fifteen again.

When they get to her place, Serena is indeed there, but with a guest. Blair and Nate are officially introduced to Ben.

At first Ben looks uncomfortable, but Nate puts him at ease. Serena seems glowing, and it makes Blair smile.

"I'm really happy for you, S" she tells her in the confine of the kitchen.

"I'm glad you like him" Serena nods "I brought him over to my mom so he could meet Rufus and Eric, but it did not go so well. But I'm sure you've heard"

Blair shows her confusion. Serena frowns.

"Dan didn't tell you? He was there"

"He didn't tell me anything"

"Well, apparently, he and Eric have decided not to trust Ben, since he sent Juliet after me and all" Serena shrugs "But you know, it'll pass I guess. I could care less what Dan thinks anyway"

Blair clears her throat. She is extremely ill-at-ease, and she doesn't know for how much longer she is going to stand the situation between Dan and Serena.

"It's weird that Dan didn't tell you, though" Serena says, trying to sound casual "I thought you told each other everything"

"How would you know? You've never even seen us together" Blair snaps. She takes a calming breath "He probably considered that it was family business, anyway"

"I didn't say it to start a fight, Blair. If you're happy, I'm happy. I just don't want you to get hurt, that's all"

Blair can't help feeling a bit suspicious in front of Serena's attitude.

"Then stop trying to hurt me" she says.

X

The disaster is avoided. Blair is going to keep her internship, and Epperly is going to get laid with that old classmate of hers. Everything is going to be fine. Blair just has to find Dan, and go have a sleepover in Brooklyn, before starting a blissful day of work tomorrow.

Dan is nowhere to be seen, though. Blair looks for Eric, because she knows they are together. She doesn't even know how she ends up in an empty conference room.

"Blair"

Blair turns around slowly toward Chuck's voice. She raises an eyebrow. She doesn't know what he wants with her, but she knows she doesn't care.

"I don't care" she says.

Chuck gives her a look and Blair crosses her arms.

"Fine. What do you want?"

"How have you been?" he asks "I haven't heard from you in a while"

"I am good. And I am not in the mood of being polite, and asking you how you are. Mainly because I've heard about you and Raina Thorpe, which leads me to believe you probably have some sort of brain injury, anyway"

Chuck laughs, and it unhinges Blair. Then she understands. This is Chuck.

"You're playing with her, aren't you?" she asks.

"It started this way. But not anymore." Chuck takes a few steps to stand closer to her "She…understands me. She had the same life as I had growing up. No mother, an absent father, having the staff of the hotel as a surrogate family"

"How sweet" Blair says, pointing just the right amount on the sarcasm.

She gave Chuck all she could ever give to someone, and he destroyed it. She doesn't want to hear about how it was only because she didn't properly understand him.

"She is really sweet, actually" Chuck nods "I think you would like her"

"She's from the Midwest"

Chuck laughs "There are so much more of the world outside of the Upper East Side, Blair"

Blair frowns in indignation. Who does he think he is? Like she doesn't know there is more to her world; her boyfriend is from Brooklyn for crying out loud.

"I came here to make amends. The therapist at Ostroff said it was essential, but I couldn't find the words yet. Until Raina"

Blair purses her lips and waits to roll her eyes at whatever ancient chines proverb he is about to cite, or whatever people are keen on in Chicago.

"Blair, I am sorry" Chuck says, and he looks her right in the eyes "I am sorry I treated you like property. I am sorry I lost my temper when you told me it was over. I am sorry, for not waiting longer at the Empire State Building. And most of all, I am sorry I never told you I loved you, when I thought I did"

Once is stops talking, Blair's heart is thumping hard into her chest, and loud into her ears.

"And I just hope, that you will find the way to forgive me"

She doesn't want to cry; she is stronger than that. She wants to tell him that he shouldn't have done anything to be sorry for in the first place. She also wants to tell him, scream that he ruined everything. She wants to show him that with a little more bravery, he would have treated her right and he wouldn't have needed the help of anyone to realize the monster he had turned into.

But then, he is looking at her with those eyes, and he looks so sincere that Blair doesn't know anything else to do but slap him. Because whenever Chuck is sincere, she ends up paying a bigger price that the previous time, and she won't let this happen once more. The hit of her palm against his cheek is sharp, almost too dramatic.

"Blair"

Dan's voice echoes in her head. Both she and Chuck turn to the door and find him leaning against the frame, coat already on, and her in his hands. He looks like he's been there for a while.

"I was going to go and grab something to eat" he says, looking only at her.

Chuck strokes his cheek, and whispers a goodbye to Blair. He stops in front of Dan, a small chuckle shaking his body before getting out. Blair looks at Dan. She doesn't dare approach him.

"Did you hear?" she asks.

Dan nods slowly "That was some apology" he clears his throat and hands over her coat "So, I'm gonna go"

"Wait. I'm coming with you"

"You don't have to" Dan says with a small shrug "I understand if you'd like to go home and…I don't know, meditate"

"There is nothing to meditate about. Chuck is sorry, I got the message, let's move on"

"Yes because saying _'let's move on'_ has always been the solution for everything that involves Chuck"

"Well it is now" Blair takes his hand, and forces him to look at her. "I don't care about anything he has to say anymore. You're…"

Blair takes a deep breath because she feels like her heart is about to jump out of her mouth.

"I love you" she whispers "You know that, right?"

Her eyes never leave his face. He is still looking at her, and he still has a slight frown between his eyebrows. He leans down to kiss her, softly.

"I do now" he says when he pulls away "Come on. Let's go"

Blair lets him tug her by the hand numbly. She is not sure she heard right, or that he understood what she was telling him. She tries to reassure herself. Perhaps he is simply not ready.

They go to a restaurant, and remain silent along the way. They sit at a small table, and when Dan makes a suggestion about her order, Blair snaps.

"Why…" she starts asking, only to find she doesn't actually know what to ask.

She sees Dan's jaw clench, but he doesn't look up from the menu.

"Let's not right now, Blair"

"Is it because of Chuck?" she asks "Because I told you, I don't care about him, and it would be stupid of you to just…"

She trails off.

"It's not because of Chuck" Dan says "It's because of you and him. It's because of this twisted thing the two of you have had going on for the past three years. You always go back to him, in the end. I'm not sure why it would be different with Dan Humphrey, from Brooklyn"

"Are you protecting yourself, then? From me? You think that there is a possibility that I could hurt you, so you're putting on a shield?"

It's not really a question, and Dan doesn't deny anyway. He just stares at her. Blair puts her coat back on and stands up.

"Congratulations, Dan. I took the chance of letting you hurt me when I told you what I did. And it didn't even take two seconds for you to do so"

She leaves the restaurant. She has had enough of everything for tonight. Dan doesn't stop her, and he doesn't chase her. When she gets home, she finds she has a voicemail. She didn't expect it to be Dan, but she is still disappointed when she hears Epperly's voice offering her a permanent post at W. Blair throws her cellphone across the room, and sits numbly on her bed.

Like she gives a fuck.

X

Blair sends one text to Dan to tell him she caught a bad flu and that she won't be receiving visitors. He is annoyed she put him in the box of 'visitors' but relieved she chose to tell him herself, and not through Dorota.

He still calls, to check on her, and to his surprise she picks up. But she's barely confirmed that it's nothing serious before hanging up. The repetitive tone rings loudly in his hear, and makes his heart heavy.

The truth is, he didn't expect Blair to say it first. He didn't expect her to say it at that moment. Sometimes, he thinks that he didn't even expect her to feel it.

Then he doesn't have time to think about it anymore, because his mother and Jenny are coming to visit for a week, just around the time he ends his internship. Allison is helping an old friend with her gallery opening, and she suggested staying the week at the loft with Jenny.

So of course, Eric is there before they've even arrived, and when Jenny walks through the door, he is the first one she hugs and squeals at. Then finally, she turns to Dan with a pout.

"Hello, traitor"

Dan sighs "Hello to you too"

"Where is your girlfriend? Busy banishing people for wearing tights as pants?"

"Actually, she is home with the flu" Dan turns to Allison "I was wondering if you could make some of your chicken soup, that I could bring to her?"

Allison pinches his cheek "Aren't you sweet? Of course, I can"

That afternoon, Allison gives Dan the recipe, telling him that nothing will cure Blair faster than a chicken soup made with care and love; and she forces Jenny to help him.

"I can't believe I am yet again paying the price for one of your flings" Jenny mumbles, taking out several tomatoes.

Dan sighs "It's so much more than that, Jenny. We've been together for a little more than a month now. And we've had feelings for each other for longer than that" He fidgets, hesitant "She told me she loved me"

Jenny looks at Dan, somehow shocked.

"She did?" she asks, barely audible.

Dan nods.

"What did you say?"

Dan shakes his head, and shrugs awkwardly "It's complicated"

Jenny frowns, putting her hands on her hips "How complicated?"

"Well. She was just talking to Chuck before, and she wanted to reassure me that nothing was happening so she said '_I love you, you know that right?' _and I answered… '_I do, now'_"

He doesn't think Jenny's eyes can stretch more. She throws a tomato at him.

"Asshole!"

Allison's voice comes out from somewhere to warn her about her language, so Jenny just throws another tomato.

"Oh so now you're taking her side" Dan dodges the coleslaw.

"It isn't Blair Waldorf's side that I am taking, but the one of a girl who gave away her heart, and had the person she loves stomp on it!"

"I didn't stomp on it!"

"Yes you did!" Jenny points an angry finger at him "You're lucky I don't tell Vanessa about it, because she would enlist Blair in whatever feminist circle she's part of and they would all advise her to dump your sorry Brooklyn ass. Now finish this soup and bring it to her"

Jenny throws a piece of carrot on him, and Dan watches her leave to kitchen, dumbfounded.

X

Dan knocks softly on Blair's door before entering. The curtains are closed, preventing any kind of daylight to invade her sickened cave. She is laying under her covers, computer on her lap, a box of tissue on her nightstand. She puts the movie on pause when she sees him standing there with a tray.

"I told Dorota no visitors"

"I'm not a visitor. I am your chef who slaved all afternoon cooking you my mother's chicken soup recipe. You're welcome"

Once he gets closer, he can see her red nose and puffy eyes. She is adorable. He sits on her bed and sets the tray on the nightstand.

"How are you feeling?"

Blair shrugs with a pout "Been better"

Dan puts his hand on her forehead. Her skin is hot. He strokes softly her face before going to take her hand.

"Listen, I want to talk to you about something"

Blair shakes her head "This is really not the time, Dan. If you're not ready, I get it. Let's just…let's forget about it okay?"

"I don't want to" Dan sits closer "Let me just acknowledge out loud how much of an asshole I am, will you?"

Blair sighs deeply, and shows him with a wave to pursue. Dan clears his throat.

"The night of your birthday, the reason I punched Chuck was because he told me he knew how to control you; that he knew exactly what to say for you to go back to him without even thinking twice about it. Then I left with Vanessa and Nate, and when I came back to tell you how I felt…well…"

Blair's eyes drift a bit ashamed at the memory. She shakes her head.

"That's not…that was before. It was another time, Dan"

"I know. I know that now. Blair, I haven't known you since we were little, and I don't come bearing gifts from all over Europe. I only have my…sorry Brooklyn heart to offer you. And some chicken soup" he smiles when he sees her laugh slightly "When I was thinking about whether or not we would survive what happened the other night, I kept thinking about what I would do if you broke up with me. And it was just so blank. No option. I genuinely would not know what to do without you in my life, now that you are a part of it"

"Well, everyone knows that" Blair gives a slight shrug.

"And I'm sure that everyone can see how desperately, almost pathetically in love with you I am"

Blair has the ghost of a smile on her lips that she bites, her eyes narrowing on him.

"Did you hear what I said?" he asks, even though he knows she did "I love you"

Blair clears her throat "I did hear. And it's very nice, but I'm hungry, so…"

"Okay, I get it" Dan surges forward to kiss her.

She mutters against his lips an order to take off his shoes. Once he did, he slides under the covers next to her, settling his head on her chest. She smells like menthol, and he can hear that she has trouble breathing.

He props himself up on one elbow to start kissing her neck, pushing her silk robe off her shoulders. Blair grunts.

"Serena is here" she whispers

"Here's an idea: how about we stop talking about our exes forever?"

Dan continues to kiss her, and she makes a small attempt at stopping him.

"I'll get you sick"

She hears him mumble on her skin something that sounds like "I don't care", and so she decides to surrender. He gets her naked without ever letting the covers off her body. Then he kisses her everywhere; her breasts, her stomach, her thighs. Blair is tired from the medicine, but she appreciates anyway. She is barely aware of him getting rid of his clothes and putting on a condom before he is sliding inside of her. Blair welcomes him, shudders at the contact of his cool skin against her feverish own. Because the flu has put her into a secondary state, what she gets out of their moment isn't much of sexual pleasure. It's more the satisfaction to know Dan there, with her, to hear him whisper again that he loves her. She likes the steady movements of his hips against her, almost lulling, and the way his forehead presses in the crook of her neck. She likes feeling his muscles tense under her fingers and hear his ragged breath, witnessing his pleasure in a dimension she hasn't had before.

When she feels him close, she closes her thighs around him to urge him on. She knows she won't get there, she is too weak, but she wants him to. She kisses him, swallowing his moans as his body goes rigid above her.

Afterward, she rests her head on his chest, closing her eyes and enjoying his hand stroking her hair. When he has fully recovered, Dan insists to dress her back on, so she won't get cold. Blair lets him, her vision dazed by the need of sleep.

"I kissed someone" she hears herself say.

Dan frowns, and looks up at her. Is she serious or is it just delirium?

"Or someone kissed me" she corrects "There was a kiss with someone else. And it changed me"

Dan clears his throat out of nervousness. He puts Blair back under the covers, and lies next to her. He doesn't touch her.

"Wanna tell me what happened?" he asks.

"I was at a party at Columbia" she says "We were sort of drunk, and both kinda depressed. He kissed me and when he stopped, he apologized and I went back home. Under the rain, which is how I got sick, I think."

"Okay" Dan nods, ignoring the small pit of jealousy mixed with insecurity "What did you mean when you said it changed you?"

"It made me realize you're the only one it feels normal to kiss now" Blair closes her eyes, ready to fall asleep "A kiss has no longer magic, unless it's with you"

Dan chuckles slightly, amazed by the emotional rollercoaster she always brings him to. He shifts closer to her, pressing her against him.

"You should really go now" she says sleepily "Before I get you sick for real"

"Nah, I'm staying. I'll have time to kick Nate's ass later"

He sees a faint smile forming on her lips.

"How did you know?"

"Someone at a Columbia party who was drunk, and kinda depressed and whose teeth you didn't knock out when he kissed you? You didn't leave out too many options"

Blair snuggles against him "When you punch him, tell him I tried my best to hide it was him"

Dan laughs, kissing her forehead "I'll try to remember"

X

Dan doesn't kick Nate's ass, because just as Blair predicted, he gets sick. His mom makes him chicken soup, and Jenny who hates Blair again has a satisfied grin every time she brings him his medicine. Blair on her side is still recovering, and stays confined at home.

And so they spend their first Valentine's Day as a couple coughing and sneezing over the phone while watching _Rosemary's Baby_ on their computer. Dan doesn't know when he falls asleep, but when he wakes up in the middle of the night, phone still against his ear, he can hear Blair's snores on the other end. He decides to fall back asleep this way.

The day before Jenny and his mom have to go back to Hudson –finally– Dan starts feeling better. He plans on enjoying a last day with his sister, watching _Back to the Future_. Their mother is again at the gallery, pretending to work when really she is on a date, and so it's just them with hot cocoa and popcorn.

When there is a knock on the door, Dan thinks it's Allison feeling bad for not spending her last day in New York with him, but he finds Blair smiling at him on the threshold.

"Hey" he says "What are you –wow"

Blair just opened her coat to reveal a lingerie bodice and garter belt ensemble and Dan is silenced with shock –and perhaps a little bit of want.

"You feel better, and I feel better so…"

She lifts a finger to graze his neck, and Dan doesn't know if he should watch her eyes which look at him maliciously, or her tongue going over her upper lip.

"What the hell?"

Jenny's voice coming from behind him is just what he needed to snap out of the situation. Blair looks over his shoulder, and stops smiling instantly. She closes her coat and looks back at Dan.

"I thought she was going to be gone today"

"Tomorrow" Dan corrects.

"Ew" Jenny has a shiver of disgust "I'm going to Dad's" she says picking up her coat.

"No Jenny, you stay here" Dan points at her, still looking at Blair "And Blair is going to join us, aren't you?"

"No" Blair simply answers before turning around to leave.

Dan grabs her arm softly to stop her. He takes her by the shoulders and leads her inside.

"Yes. You still have some clothes here, go put them on, and we can all enjoy a movie together"

Blair rolls her eyes and lets Dan lead her to his room. While she changes, she hears him whisper -fight with Jenny. She hears the words _crazy_ and _evil_. When she gets out, Jenny is sitting on the couch, arms crossed, pouting. Blair takes a seat on the far opposite side of the couch and Dan sits on the floor between them. Before putting the movie on, he turns to both of them and tells them to behave.

He hands Blair a mug of hot cocoa, and a little bowl of popcorn. She turns up her nose.

"I don't like cocoa"

Dan blinks "Well, that's just a big fat lie. Come on, it's tradition"

"I don't care. I am in the mood for tea"

Jenny looks at her, halfway between annoyed and incredulous.

"There is no tea" she says "Only cocoa, if you don't like it, no one is forcing you here"

"I am forcing her here" Dan says, getting up "I'll get her highness a cup of tea"

Dan watches them from the kitchen. Jenny seems to be trying to focus on the movie as much as she can, but Dan can see her move uncomfortably on the couch, like Blair is the pea under her hundred mattresses. Blair on the other side is sitting very still, almost nonchalant. When she yawns rather loudly, certainly to annoy Jenny and that he sees his sister turn her head sharply toward Blair, Dan braces himself.

"Okay, why?" Jenny asks Blair "Is it your way of paying me back for Chuck?"

Blair grimaces at her "If only you stopped thinking more of what you actually are. What I do as nothing to do with you or Chuck. The two of you can get together and live a happy borderline incestuous life, for all I care"

"In that case: why my brother? Why does Blair Waldorf, who could have all the Nate Archibalds in the world, want Dan Humphrey, from Brooklyn?"

At first, Blair shakes slightly her head, refusing to dignify Jenny with a response. Then she glances at her, and says;

"It's like your scarf"

Dan cannot see Jenny's face at that moment, but he is pretty sure it matches his own expression.

"You know how that Hermès scarf has been a constant part of the winter collection, each year ever since the house started, but never had that much success?" Blair asks.

Jenny nods, slowly "And then, one day, they change the color by a shade down and everybody is crazy about it"

"It is still one of their most successful articles" Blair says "Well, it's a bit like that"

Jenny seems lost in her thought for one second.

"Really?" she asks Blair, looking genuinely dubious "Dan?"

Blair gives a shrug like '_what can you do?' _ and nods. Dan on his part is trying to process the fact that not only his girlfriend just compared him to a scarf, but his sister didn't even find _him_ worthy of the comparison. He smiles, though, when he hears Jenny compliment Blair on her blouse. Blair purses slightly her lips, doesn't say thank you but tells her the heels she saw in the bathroom are pretty.

As if they both sense him watching them, they turn toward him and both of their faces close when they see him smile.

"What are you looking at?" Jenny snaps at him.

"How long does it take you to make a cup of tea?" Blair follows "Move it, before I change my mind about you and dump your sorry Brooklyn ass"

Dan has to turn back to hide his widening grin.

Jenny and Blair do not say another word to each other. When Allison comes back, she asks Blair to stay for diner. Blair accepts, but she becomes really quiet and calm, every time Allison is in the same room. She sort of follows Dan around, pinching his sweatshirt between her fingers to tell him to wait for her when he leaves a room. Dan laughs at her behavior and tells her she has nothing to be afraid of. Blair dismisses the idea with a casual shrug; but she stills follows him everywhere he goes.

While Allison cooks, she puts music on. Blair isn't surprise to hear some Aznavour; it actually makes her smile. She is washing her hands in the bathroom when _For me, Formidable _starts to play. Dan joins her, and they start dancing secretly to the song in the bathroom. Jenny walks in on them, pauses, rolls her eyes and goes.

Rufus arrives with dessert, to spend a last night with Jenny. Vanessa arrives with the vegan entrées. It feels almost like old times to Dan. The downside is that his parents barely talk to each other; but this fall in the situation is somehow compensated by Blair sitting next to him.

The following day, when they say goodbye at Grand Station, Dan feels a lot sadder than he would have imagined. He had gotten used way too quickly to have his mother back living with him. When she sees his dreadful face, she pulls his head down on her shoulder and smothers his hair, whispering that she is proud of him, and that she likes Blair. Dan mumbles a "thanks mom" before turning to hug Jenny goodbye.

When he leaves the station, he finds Blair waiting for him, wrapped into a warm coat, leaning against a town car. With a little smile, she tells him to hop in and takes him to an Italian restaurant. They kiss over cannelloni, and Dan thinks that the new times aren't so bad.

They are actually pretty fucking amazing.

X

Eric seeks Dan's help, because Serena refuses to hear anything coming from him, and Dan isn't sure that he is just the right person to make Serena come down to earth. But if Ben has indeed a copy of the affidavit that could send Lily to prison, Dan knows that his father could be also hurt by the situation.

But the truth is, if Lily were to go to jail, she would have deserved it. She did something wrong. But then he thinks again about his dad. And when Blair tells him she is going to his place to wait for him, Dan drags his conflicted self to hers.

Serena seems to be about to leave when he arrives. She rolls her eyes.

"Blair is at your place" she says, trying to walk pass him.

Dan steps to the side, blocking her way.

"It's you I want to talk to, actually"

"I don't have time"

"Eric told me about the affidavit"

Serena stops, pushes out an annoyed sigh and crosses her arms.

"Why am I not surprised?" she asks.

"You need to end things with him. He is not right for you if he would want to hurt your family. I get that the past few weeks have been hard for you…"

"It's not that he wants to hurt my family" Serena cuts him off "It's much more complicated and you know it"

And Dan does know it. He nods.

"I know, believe me. But he's caused you and Eric to fight, Serena. You and Eric! You guys love each other more than anything. When he tries to kill himself, you move back to the city and when you're committed to Ostroff, he basically stops eating for two days. That's the kind of things you do, but you don't fight! This whole thing isn't about you not finding happiness, it's about loyalty"

Serena closes her eyes, like she is going to explode.

"Loyalty!" she exclaims "You want to talk about loyalty, Dan? Where were you the past two months?"

Dan knows the conversation shifted. He stands as confused as before, though.

"What do you mean? You're the one who said –"

"I know what I said, Dan. I said that you couldn't be at the penthouse until I said it was okay for you to be. And Blair accepted it, because she wanted things to get better between us. But what did you do about that, Dan? What did you do about you and me?"

"Serena…what do you want from me?" Dan asks, tired.

"Right now, nothing! Nothing anymore" she starts yelling, and Dan doesn't think he's ever heard her yell before "What I wanted you to do, though, was to show me that you wanted to fight for at least our friendship. I wanted you to come down here and talk to me about it. I threw all those accusations at you, about stealing everyone for me, and you never even came to ask me why I felt this way. I don't care that you're in love with my best friend, now; good for you! I just wanted you to show me that the two years that I had loved you for weren't just fate's way of bringing you to Blair. I wanted you to show me that even though it wasn't perfect, it was real"

Dan just stands there, feeling like an idiot, and like an asshole. He doesn't know what to say, he doesn't know what to do. But it strikes him that it isn't the first time he's made Serena cry, as he watches her wipe away the angry tears on her cheek.

"I don't know what you were hoping would happen" Serena says, her voice low and calm now "But just sitting back in Brooklyn and wait wasn't the solution. So the next time you want to come and talk to me about loyalty, why don't you just fuck off instead?"

When she starts walking out again, Dan doesn't stop her.

X

Blair waits around for Dan at the loft. She quit the job at W, she was imploding, trying to jungle with everything and not even Dan helping her could have changed anything. She fidgets around Rufus' records collection, finding things that she thinks Cyrus might like. She tries not to get bored as long as she can, and ends up reading on his bed. Reading is not good though, it gives her too much space to think. And Blair doesn't want to think. She has been trying to avoid doing it for weeks now.

She almost jumps when she sees Vanessa appearing by the window. A hand over her heart, she puts the book away.

"Can't you at least shout from down there that you're coming up?"

Vanessa is clearly surprised to see her. Blair takes in her red eyes and nose, and realizes that she had been crying.

"Sorry" she says "I thought Dan would be home by now"

"Well so did I" Blair sighs, looking over her face once more "Are you okay?"

Vanessa seems hesitant before asking "Do you care?"

Blair shrugs "I'm bored"

She tries to put on the most convincing face, but Vanessa frowns at her.

"Are _you_ okay?" she asks.

Blair gets off the bed, and puts on her shoes.

"I asked you first" she says, picking up her purse "I need coffee, come with me"

They go to a coffee shop, and sit with a warm mug between their hands. Blair isn't really surprised that whatever is bothering Vanessa has something to do with Nate. She listens, while Vanessa tells her about how she expected him to break up with her, and how it still hurt more than if she hadn't suspected anything. Blair listens while Vanessa drifts off and starts listing their little habits, like watching the Age of Innocence while eating burgers –the only time she actually eats meat. When Vanessa actually says out loud that she misses Nate so much she sometimes think she can't breathe, Blair wants to throw her mug away. She wants to stand up and yell to Vanessa to run to him, to run for love.

She doesn't, of course. She just nods and says that it was both of their decision to break up, and that they should try to at least be friends. Blair manages to admit that she has never actually witnessed people who loved each other so much that they were willing to stay away from each other, because they knew it was best.

Vanessa frowns, and asks her if it's not what she's doing with Chuck. Blair shakes her head, and then shrugs in uncertainty. Chuck is a whole other story. Blair finds it curious, though, that the conversation about Vanessa's troubles naturally shifted into her own.

She tells Vanessa about the apology, and about how she has been thinking about it every day since.

"Blair" Vanessa leans forward, serious "I am not saying that because my oldest friend is madly in love with you. I am saying that for you: I don't think that you should go back with Chuck"

"I don't want to" Blair shakes her head "I am very happy with Dan. It's just…what is it about me? We've seen Chuck with Eva, and then with Raina. I've known him since we were four years old, if he had to be so cruel with someone, why me? I've been going over and over this in my head, I can't take it anymore"

Vanessa shrugs, and says she doesn't think there is a rational explanation for it. She tells Blair that she should just be glad that she got away, and that she moved on. Blair thinks about it, and finds that she is actually really glad she found Dan.

"Look at us" Vanessa smiles, shaking her head "Crying because of men. Not even men, _boys_"

"And in Brooklyn" Blair adds "And meanwhile, Serena, the one you would expect this kind of behavior from is happily in love with the men her mother sent to prison"

They laugh together. While Vanessa walks Blair back to the loft so she won't get lost, she talks about art and exhibits, and movies. It occurs to Blair that while Dan is often all about the classics, Vanessa is all about the incomers. When she tells her about Joseph Beuys, Blair wants to laugh, realizing she is the one who got Dan into that in the first place.

Blair had never seen it this way, but she thinks she could be friends with Vanessa. It's basically Dan with prettier shoes.

X

"Hey, I thought you would be waiting for me here"

Blair gives Dan a shy smile as she comes back into the loft. He is sitting at the bar, probably doing homework.

"I'm sorry. I wanted coffee and I don't know how to use your machine"

"Remind me to teach you"

"I won't"

Dan laughs. She watches him go back to his homework, and takes in the way his pencil taps nervously on the bar.

"What is it?" she asks, sitting next to him.

Dan sighs, pivots on his seat to face her.

"Remember how I say we should stop talking about our exes?" he asks, and Blair nods "Well I'm taking off that rule. I've just had a very heated conversation with Serena, and it kinda broke my heart"

"I'm sorry" Blair wonders if she should worry "What did she say?"

"That I gave up on her; on our friendship. And you know, I think she might be right"

Blair nods. Everything feels heavy. She thinks getting with Dan is the point of no return. They were all already intrinsically connected, and it's like their couple is the one last connection that snarled the thread into a tangled so tight, that it wouldn't be possible to undo it without cutting an edge.

"Humphrey, I need to ask you something" she says, swallowing "And you have to be honest"

Dan stares, a little worried, and then nods.

"Are we Nate and Vanessa 2.0?" she asks.

Dan frowns, and opens slightly his arms, asking for an explanation. Blair sighs. He never gets anything.

"The one from Brooklyn, the one from the Upper East Side, the Serena phantom luring over them" she says "Are we just a version of them that will inevitably end the same way?"

"Of course not" Dan says without hesitation "What happened with them was unfortunate, and I think that there is a lot more to what we actually see, or what they tell us. But they have nothing in common with us"

"Did you not just hear the common points I just listed?"

"Well, then, not that many" Dan gets down from his seat to get closer to her "Where does all of this worry come from?"

Blair refuses to tell him about her little outing with Vanessa. She'll never hear the end of it, and it was something shared between two women; he doesn't need to get involved.

"I'm just scared that we're fooling ourselves" she says "The first time we went out in public, we got kicked out; the first time we had sex was disastrous; I got you the flue for our first Valentine's Day, even our first _I love you_, oh God!" Blair puts a hand over her face, feeling the despair taking over.

She hears Dan laugh, and looks up.

"What is so funny?"

"Blair, we had our first kiss on a starry summer night in front of the lit up Eiffel Tower, after a fantastic wine tasting and a romantic tour by night you gave me. Of course all our other _firsts_ wouldn't compare. We jinxed it"

Blair thinks about it, and she can't help laughing too.

"You think so?" she asks

"I'm positive" Dan nods "Get ready for a lot of other disastrous firsts"

Blair bites her lip. Apparently Dan thinks they still have a lot more to live than what they've already had.

"Like what?" she asks.

Dan sighs under the thought "First vacation together. Just imagine the fight about choosing the hotel"

And Blair can see it. It makes her laugh.

"First holiday with the other's family" she says "We won't necessarily be the problem, but when was the last time your turkey wasn't served with a side of drama?"

"If we ever have children, the first one will end up in a mental institution"

Blair frowns, but smiles

"Children?" she asks, wary "You think we'll make it to there? You've already picked their names, haven't you?"

"Ha ha" Dan gives her a shrug "It's just that if there is one thing I've learned from my dad and Lily, and your dad and Roman, for instance, is that a functioning relationship is about love which meets timing" he takes her in his arms "Now, we're twenty, and in love"

"So that gets me stuck with you forever?" she asks, skeptical.

"I'm just saying that we have no reasons to be afraid of a long run"

Blair doesn't answer, and she tries not to smile either, because once she stars she wouldn't know how to stop. He can be so annoyingly cute.

"So we're doomed for eternity?"

Dan leans down to kiss her "Looks that way. But hey" he cups her head between his hands "We'll always have Paris, right?"

This time, Blair does smile, and kisses him, with all of her heart. Dan is smiling too when she pulls away.

"Come on, I'll grab us blankets, let's go on the roof watch winter sunset"

And so they go stand on the roof and watch Brooklyn move under the pale blue light of the night progressively falling. They snuggle with each other, maintaining the blanket wrapped warmly around them. They don't talk much, just gaze aver the horizon at Manhattan which looks less and less away to both of them the more time goes by.

* * *

_Next chapter is more fun. With of course, a little bit of drama, but it will bring this fic to a happier path, in the end. And someone asked on tumblr how many chapters this fic was going to be, and the answer is eight, just like La Bohème._

_Hope to be back soon, love you guys!_


	5. Chapter 5

_Hi lovelies!_

_Okay, so this chapter is special. Why, you ask? Because in this chapter, the canon storylines of the characters are twisted and kind of reoriented. You'll see. I hope it won't be too complicated, or even disappointing._

_So here is the introduction of a new character, one that I created and that perhaps some of you already know if you read my flubbles on Tumblr. I hope that you'll be happy about this new arrival in the gang._

_Also, can I just say how adorable it is that you guys worry about Natessa. As I told many of you, they are really far from being over, but it will develop much more in the fic coming after this one, and that will be called Les Plaisirs Démodés, another Aznavour title song._

_Enjoy!_

* * *

"Spring is there!"

Dan falls off his bed almost right away. Massaging the painful spot on his skull, he sits up on the floor to look at Blair beaming at him. His eyes travel upon her, to the window through which he can see pouring rain, and back to her.

"Spring is so not there, Blair"

"Of course it is" she says "I can feel it"

"When you look out the window, can't you feel that you're wrong?"

"Oh, that" Blair puts down her umbrella and sits on his bed, tapping on it to show him to come back there "That's just Serena"

Dan goes back to sit on his bed, greets her with a kiss, and waits for her to explain. His silence after she spoke is his usual way of showing her that he doesn't know what she is talking about.

"She has been stuck in her room for ages, only goes out to go to class" Blair says "We need to cheer her up, so spring can really come"

Dan rubs his face, tired "You think that it's raining because Serena is sad"

"It's actually how weather in New York really works"

Dan thinks about it for a few seconds, then decides that he doesn't have time for this. His bed is too comfortable and his sleep was too abruptly interrupted. He goes back under the covers, and turns his back to Blair, hoping she would decide to leave him alone. She doesn't, of course. She shakes him, telling him to get up and get dressed, actually whining until he gives in.

Rain is still pouring heavily when they leave his loft. They get into her town car, and Dan finds himself nervous.

"I don't think Serena wants to see me" he tells Blair.

"This thing between the two of you isn't going to last, we know it. The sooner it ends the better. I think a truce will be the perfect way of bringing back the sun"

"The weather doesn't settle on Serena's mood, Blair"

She doesn't answer. When the car stops on Madison Avenue, Blair drags Dan out of it and into what appears to be a luxury accessories store. They are greeted happily by the saleswoman, who relieves them of their coats.

"Really?" Dan whispers "You think a pair of Vivier is all it takes to make Serena better? Her mother is going to prison, Blair"

"You are getting really annoying, Humphrey" Blair whispers too "I know my best friend, okay? Now stop talking before I shove this umbrella somewhere completely devoid of sunshine"

"You make a lot of threats like these" Dan crosses his arms "If this is a subliminal way to get me to do things like this, I have to let you know that this isn't happening"

"Psh, prude"

They laugh together, and try to look the most normal possible when the saleswoman comes back to them.

It takes Blair an hour to find the right pair of shoe. The search is scattered into several categories: those Serena will like for sure, those she might like, those that would go with her little red skirt, 'you know, the one with the bow' –Dan doesn't know, but nods anyway –and finally those that Blair like and absolutely has to try on just to see what they feel like –turns out apparently that it feels like heaven.

Meanwhile, Dan stands there, nodding, humming, and widening his eyes in his best fake display of interest. Either Blair buys it, or chooses to ignore his attitude, but the saleswoman tells them about how sweet they are.

Eventually, Blair decides on a virginal white pair and Dan has trouble to remain standing when he sees the price.

With the box wrapped in a red bow, they leave the store and head to Blair's penthouse. Serena is in the kitchen, and Dan can see why Blair thinks that she is the reason why the weather is being so depressing. She is wearing a robe, her hair is kind of all over the place and she looks like she hasn't smiled in years.

It shocks Dan, because Serena usually always has the hint of a smile on her face.

When she sees them, she sighs loudly and takes her mug with her, muttering she is going upstairs. Blair stops her.

"Dan has a present for you" she says.

She turns to Dan, and shows him with a threatening smile to step forward. Dan walks toward Serena , and hands over the box. Serena stares blankly at him, and he hears Blair clear her throat behind him. Taking a deep breath, he looks in his mind for the sentence Blair made him rehearse on their way there.

"Blair showed me a picture of your dress for the Pink Party, and when we stopped by Vivier earlier, I saw those and thought that they would go well with it

Serena puts down her mug slowly, and takes the box from him.

"Did you?" she asks, glancing behind him at Blair.

Dan gives a shrug. Serena sighs again, and opens the box. Her eyes stretch in awe at the sight of the shoes. She takes them out of the box and tries one on. Dan hears her give out and excited gasp, and watches as she leans down to admire the shoe on her feet.

She leans back up "They are perfect. Thank you"

It is so obvious that Blair is the one behind all of this that Dan is surprised, and quite uncomfortable when he sees Serena is only looking at him.

"I have a class this afternoon, I've got to get ready" she says.

She takes the box with her, gives Blair a quick hug before getting out of the kitchen. Dan turns to Blair, and sees her smile sweetly at him.

It stops raining by the end of the afternoon, leaving place for a bright sun and building heat. As they walk in Central Park, Blair smiles smugly while Dan keeps repeating that it's the biggest fluke ever. She just keeps walking, sunglasses on, nose up to the sky, enjoying the sun on her cheeks. She decides to take the high road, and tells Dan "Whatever you say".

It annoys him more than he admits. In the end, he decides that it doesn't really matter. Fluke or not, spring is there. He thinks it might be his favorite season lighting to watch Blair in.

X

"Nate we have been over this about seventeen times. Michelangelo painted the Sistine Chapel, and Leonardo Da Vinci took care of François the 1st's castle. Not the other way around"

Nate's eyes narrow on Blair, as he points a suspicious pencil at her.

"Are you certain of it?"

"Am I certain that you're a moron?"

"That's mean"

Blair closes her eyes. If he wasn't so beautiful, she would bash his head open with his Art History book. When she hears the elevator announcing a visitor, she prays that it's Dan coming to distract Nate from being a pity excuse for a student. Her body tenses a bit when she sees Vanessa almost running toward them.

"Blair" she says, out of breath.

Nate turns around at the sound of her voice, and Vanessa stops still when she sees him. Blair watches carefully while they look at each other in a sort of primitive awkwardness.

"Hi" Vanessa finally says.

"Hi" Nate answers.

They can't seem to say anything else, and Blair enjoys watching them as much as helping Nate study, so she clears her throat and asks Vanessa for the reason of her presence. Vanessa shakes ever so slightly her head, like she is getting out of a trance, and focuses back on Blair.

"Yes, I need to tell you something"

"I'm listening"

Blair wonders for a second when she started listening willingly to Vanessa.

"I was in Brooklyn…" Vanessa started.

"Spoiler alert" Blair snorts sarcastically.

"…and I saw Georgina. She was with a baby. I assume it's Milo"

Blair remains silent, because she really doesn't know what to do with that information. A year ago, she wouldn't have even cared that Georgina was back into town, and today she can bet anything that it is going to affect her life, even in the slightest of ways. Nate and Vanessa are both staring at her, probably waiting for some kind of reaction from her. She swallows.

"Are you…do you think Dan knows?"

"I don't know" Vanessa says "I was more wondering if he would care to know"

"Of course he would" Nate says, but doesn't sound very convinced.

"Why?" Blair asks "I mean, it's not like…"

She wants to say _It's not like he's his_, but after having witness everything related to Milo in Dan's life, ever since the previous summer in Paris, Blair knows the definition of the relationship is not so simple. She also doesn't know where to situate herself at, into that mess.

She stands up, picking up her purse.

"I'm going to go find him" she says.

And so she goes. On her way to NYU, she tries to call his cellphone, but it's off. She knows Dan turns it off when he is in classes. Because she has his schedule kind of memorized, she walks to one class, hoping to find him there. He isn't. She goes to the floor of the library she knows he always works on, but she doesn't see him there either. As she checks one significant spot to another and still doesn't find him, she starts becoming nervous. His cellphone is still off.

Ultimately, she takes a cab to Brooklyn. The door to the loft is locked, and no one answers when she knocks. So she starts walking around his neighborhood, figuring that it gives her at least a bit of time to plan in her head the way she ought to start the conversation.

As she passes in front of a coffee shop, Blair doesn't know if it's the plaid shirt, or the shiny Jimmy Choos that catches her attention through the window glass. Just like some burlesque character, she takes a step backward and puts her back against the brick wall not to be seen. Then she leans a bit to the side to watch. She can only see Dan from the back, and unfortunately, Georgina is upfront.

She has that smile on her face, the one that she uses to lure people in, the one that says "_I know I'm crazy, but at least it's entertaining_". Milo is on her lap, playing happily with a spoon.

Blair actually catches her breath when she sees Dan extending shyly his arms toward him, and Milo leaning into his hold. Dan settles him on his lap, and starts to play with him. Blair whishes at that instant that she could see the look on his face, so she would know what to do or how to act the next time she sees him.

She stays this way for a little while, and Dan never turns around, or not even a little to the side. He stays focused on Milo. So Blair thinks that perhaps it isn't her place to be, and she goes, taking the first cab she finds back to Manhattan.

X

Dan doesn't tell Blair about Georgina being back in town and meeting with her. Two days go by, and he doesn't mention it once, doesn't even give out any signs that he had a meeting with his past.

Blair doesn't know how to react to him not telling her, so she ends up doing just like him; she pretends.

The afternoon before the Pink Party which has been moved to the Van der Humphreys since Lily got sentenced to house arrest, Blair lays out her dress on her bed, and goes to Serena's room to ask her if she wants to try different shades of make-up. Serena is still wearing the outfit she wore to college, and she is putting her shoes back on.

"Hey, Nate and I were going to get coffee, before having to get ready for the party" she says when she sees Blair "Don't wait for me, I'll get ready at my mom's"

"Oh" Blair says a bit disappointed that her original plan wouldn't go through "Well, wait for me, I'll come with"

"You don't have to" Serena says with a shrug "Nate and I will probably only talk about our convicted parents anyway, it'll bore you more than anything. Besides, don't you have a French paper to finish?"

Blair stares at Serena. She is clearly trying to convince her not to come. Blair shrugs.

"Right. I'll see you tonight, then"

Serena kisses her on the cheek before leaving. Blair stands there, wondering what is it about her that makes people lie to her, and think that she doesn't notice. She goes back to her room, and takes out her cellphone. Wondering if she is going to regret this, she sends Vanessa a text.

Vanessa arrives after her last class of the day. She drops her bag on the floor and takes off her shoes to sit cross-legged on Blair's bed, starting drawing mustaches on the people's faces photographed in Dan's New Yorker magazine that was laying on the nightstand.

Blair wipes her mouth in front of the mirror, not liking the shade of Chanel she just tried on.

"I can't believe you and Dan talked me into the Joseph Beuys exhibit after all" she says, picking up another lipstick.

"Look at what he looks like with a mustache" Vanessa holds out the magazine to Blair with a proud smile.

It does make Blair laugh, just a little.

"I wasn't feeling good that day" she says "We should go on a field trip, to see just again"

"Fine" Vanessa says, going back to her drawing "As long as we don't go to see that movie again, the one about the Canadian painter"

They both shiver in disgust at the memory.

"Dan is dying to go" Blair says "But I don't know if I can sit through it again"

"Tell him you've already seen it, then" Vanessa shrugs, as if the answer to Blair's problem is so obvious.

Blair turns away from the mirror and back to her.

"Do you want to explain to him why _we_ went to the movies together?" she asks.

Vanessa thinks about it "Wow. You're going to have to see it again. Sucks to be you"

"Tell me about it" Blair groans.

She goes to take a shower, and by the time she comes out, Vanessa is done drawing all the mustaches she could. She is so weird, sometimes. Blair sits in front of her dressing table, and calls Dorota to help her fix her hair. Vanessa starts going through Blair's shoe closet.

"I am only going to ask this once" Blair says "Are you sure you don't want to come, tonight?"

"Yep" Vanessa answers, frowning at a Manolo.

Blair hesitates for a moment, then says "Nate and Serena went out for coffee, and she insisted I didn't come. I think there might be something going on between them again, because it's Nate and Serena. And in the eventuality I'm right, I wanted to give you a heads-up"

Vanessa turns toward Blair. She is smiling.

"Thanks" she says "I really appreciate"

Blair frowns, looking at Vanessa's reflection in the mirror.

"You're not upset?" she asks

"Nate and I are trying to be friends, and it's working" Vanessa answers "I want him to be happy. And I also don't think he is sneaking behind us to start a torrid affair with Serena"

"I hate to break it to you, but it's totally the kind of things they would do" Blair says, a bit annoyed "Right, Dorota?"

Dorota nods reluctantly, and Vanessa laughs.

"I know it is. I just don't think that it's what's going on"

"Then what is going on?" Blair stands up, since Dorota is done with her hair.

"They are sneaking away from you" Vanessa shrugs.

Blair dismisses Dorota with a wave. She frowns at Vanessa, crossing her arms.

"Care to explain?"

Vanessa sighs, like the answer is going to be painful to give.

"Nate and I broke up, Serena and Ben broke up, and then there is you and Dan, being all happy and couply and perfect"

Blair frowns even more, and Vanessa laughs again.

"Remember when you were going on about how you and Dan are a sans-drama couple?" she asks "Well you're even worse than that. You're a survivor couple. Everything that comes your way, you ride it over, and it barely shakes you. If anything it makes you stronger. And it kind of pisses us off"

"So you're telling me that you're all avoiding us because we're happy?"

"Yes" Vanessa answers without flinching "But not always. Sometimes it's just because the two of you alone are already really annoying people"

Blair purses her lips "Well, aren't we blessed for having friends like you all"

"You know, you really are" Vanessa fiddles through her purse, and takes out two little joints "Want a hit before having to go to your boring fancy party?"

Blair bites her lip in hesitation, before going to close her doors, so Dorota won't come asking questions. She hadn't smoked joints since sophomore year of high school with Nate, until she started hanging out with Vanessa. They open the window and lean on it.

"So, why aren't you and Nate together again?" Blair asks as Vanessa lights up her joint.

"Because love sucks" Vanessa answers "You'll feel the same when you'll have to go see that horrible movie with Dan again"

"Probable" she takes a long drag "Dan met with Georgina. But he never told me about it. See, we're not that perfect"

"Dan has the tendency to think that everyone should just guess when there is something wrong" Vanessa says "And if it's not that, then he'll tell you. And then you'll go back to being perfect"

"Stop saying we're perfect!" Blair stomps her foot "We're not. Nothing is ever perfect, that's like Life 101"

"Perhaps" Vanessa shrugs "But supposing you could be, why not embrace it?"

"Because then something will go wrong, and make me fall down from my cloud of fake perfection"

"If that happens, you can be sure that Dan will be there to catch you" Vanessa says "And that, that's kind of perfection"

X

Dan doesn't really want to be at this party, but he knows it's important to his family, so he sucks it up and smiles when he's told to. Nate and Blair are having fun, at least. Blair is at her fourth pink cocktail, because she finds the strawberry flavor delicious. Nate follows her lead, even when she starts singing along the _Safety Dance_ remix playing in the background. Dan suspects Nate to have given her something, because she looks kind of high to him.

Serena stands by her mother the whole time, an untouched glass of champagne between her fingers.

When Dan gets a bit tired of being called a party-pooper by both Nate and Blair, he decides to go take a break from all the socializing in Eric's room. He warns Nate not to kiss Blair unless he wants his ass kicked before leaving them to their cheerful mood.

Dan stops when he sees a man standing outside of Serena's old room, holding in his hands a white Vivier shoe. The man seems to be talking to someone through the closed door. When Dan asks if there is something wrong, the man tells him that a blonde woman just rushed inside the room, leaving a shoe behind and that she seemed to be having some sort of panic attack.

Dan sighs, taking the shoe from him, saying he'll take care of it. The man seems to hesitate, looking a bit worried, but he leaves anyway. Dan knocks softly on the door before entering.

Serena's back is turned to him, and she looks like she has trouble breathing. Dan closes the door behind him, puts the shoe on the ground.

"Serena"

"Take it off"

Dan pauses for a second, wondering what she is saying.

"The dress, take it off!" she almost yells, voice pierced with anxiety.

Dan moves quickly to unzip the flyer on her back. Serena pushes the dress down and off with trembling hands, remaining in her bodice. Dan looks to the ground while she goes lie down on her bed. When he looks back up, he sees her grasping the cover sheets. He dares take a step forward.

"What's going on?"

"It's nothing" Serena says, eyes closed.

"It doesn't look like nothing"

"It happens sometimes. I'm fine"

Dan takes another step forward, one long enough to make him stand beside the bed. He takes off his jacket, and sits next to her.

"How long?" he asks simply.

Serena gives a little shrug, focusing on her breathing. He hears her whisper faintly that she is fine. Dan stays there, completely immobile until Serena's body has a spasm, and she gasps. Her hand grasps his dress shirt, pulling him closer. Dan lies on the bed next to her, bringing her to rest on his chest in an attempt to soothe her.

"It's okay" he says, several time so she believes it.

Serena doesn't answer anything. They stay this way until her breathing calms down, and her body isn't shaking anymore. Even then, Dan can feel that she is tense. He isn't very comfortable either, doesn't dare think of what would happen if anyone –especially Blair –was to find them in this position. But he stays there, with Serena.

"It wasn't nothing" he says "You and me. It was real."

It's something that has been bothering him to tell her for a while, but he never found the right time to.

"I know" Serena replies in a little voice "I know it was"

"It wasn't fate's way of bringing me to Blair. It doesn't work like that"

"I know. It was just easier to put the blame on fate rather than acknowledging I had screwed up everything"

"We're both to blame, Serena. Besides, something amazing came out of our story" Dan presses her closer "Have you seen our parents? They're amazing"

He sees Serena manage a smile, and she nods in agreement.

"I want what they have" she says.

"You'll get it. Something or someone is coming for you, Serena. It might not be me, or Nate, but there is someone out there for you"

Serena's hand slips from his chest to take his, weaving their fingers together. He lets her.

"Remember when I told my mom that we were forever?" she waits for him to nod before continuing "I think that we still are, in a way. If not through our parents' marriage, then through Blair"

Dan feels something in his heart, a tug rather pleasant.

"You think Blair and I are forever?"

"I think Blair and _I _are forever" Serena answers "And if neither of you end up killing the other, then so will you and I. I think that out of all the people I know, Blair is the one that deserves the most a shot at happiness. I think that perhaps us meeting wasn't fate's way of bringing you to her, but a bit of fate's way of bringing her to you"

Dan chuckles "I like that. Feeling better?"

"Yeah. Let's take Blair and Nate with us and get outta here"

With a last squeeze of linked hands, they move away from each other. Dan still feels a tad awkward, but somehow in a good way. He puts his jacket on, tells her to get dressed while he'll go get Nate and Blair. Serena calls him right before he leaves.

He turns back to her, and sees her approaching him. She puts her hands on his shoulder.

"Thank you" she says

Dan gives her a slight smile that disappears when he sees her lean forward. Their lips touch for about two seconds before she moves away.

"That was only to get you to stop giving Nate crap about drunkenly kissing Blair last month" Serena says "Now get out of this room and stop staring at me in my underwear. You're dating my best friend, for God's sake"

X

The world is kind of crooked to Blair. Everything also moves too slowly, or too fast, she is not sure but she knows it's not a normal pace. Blair finishes her cocktail in one gulp. She really needs to get that recipe.

She starts walking around as straight as she can, remembering that she has a boyfriend and that she hasn't seen him for a while. She heads toward the bedrooms, knowing that he would have sought an outsider haven in Eric's room.

Sure enough, she finds him in the hallway, standing outside Serena's room. He looks weird.

"You look weird" she says, going to stand in front of him.

"You look drunk" he replies.

"Am not. What you do here?"

Dan laughs at her inability to form correct sentences, and okay, perhaps she is a little drunk.

"I was with Serena. She is in her room getting changed. We're taking Nate with us, and heading back to your place"

"Let's call Vanessa" Blair says, and when Dan raises his eyebrows "I want her and Nate to get married and have a lot of babies"

"Correction, you are wasted"

"It's my new project. Be happy, it'll get me off your hair" she pushes him against the wall "What were you doing with Serena?"

"We talked" Dan shrugs, wondering if Blair can sense something.

It looks like she can, because she eyes him suspiciously, then at Serena's closed door before going back on him. Dan watches as her fingers go to undo the first three buttons of his shirt, pushing it open.

"What are you doing?"

Blair leans forward, and presses her mouth against his bare chest, right over where his heart is beating underneath his skin. Her lipstick leaves a pink mark on it.

"I claim your heart as mine" she says.

She closes the buttons sloppily before tugging his head down to make him kiss the swell of her left breast that her dress allow to peek out.

"And I give you mine. Never give it back, and I'll keep yours. Always"

She leans back up with him, going for a kiss, but ends up collapsing against him.

"Oh boy" Dan says.

Luckily, Nate finds them and laughs when he sees Blair against Dan.

"Go say goodnight to your parents" he says "I'll get her. Come on, Brooklyn"

"Don't call me Brooklyn" Blair mutters as her body is transferred from against Dan's to Nate's.

Dan goes find his parents, and Serena joins him. Blair and Nate are already next to the elevator, waiting for them. As they head over there, Dan sees the man that was outside Serena's room earlier. He approaches him.

"Hey, thank you for warning me about my friend" he says, holding out his hand.

"It's no trouble. Is she okay?" the man asks, shaking his hand.

Dan finds him disturbingly polite, but notices a slight accent and figures his attitude is just not American. He looks him over. He looks too young to be a friend of Lily's and he looks slightly out of place, alone with his drink.

"Yeah she's fine" Dan says "So, my friends and I were going to head to my girlfriend's, this party isn't really our generation. Wanna come with?"

The guy looks surprised, but smiles anyway.

"If it's not too much trouble" he says excitedly.

"It's really not" Dan laughs "I'm Dan, by the way"

"My name is Louis"

Dan nods, and invites him with a wave to come with him to the elevator. He introduces him to Nate, and Blair who is already sleeping against Nate's shoulder. Then he turns to Serena.

"He is the one who found your shoe" Dan tells her "He is basically your prince charming"

Louis laughs nervously while Serena shakes his hand.

"Too bad I don't believe in fairytales" she says.

They all go back together to the penthouse. Blair insists to stay with them in the living room, saying she's not tired but ends up falling asleep on the couch. She also insists that they call Vanessa, who arrives half an hour later with two cases of beers.

Dan sees Serena a bit lighter, talking to Louis who's sitting on the floor next to her; Nate and Vanessa are too drunk to remember to be awkward around each other. They ask Louis about himself, and he gives a careless shrug, keeping the details vague. He is just a French guy who has always wanted to visit New York, and decided to do so before associating in business with someone he doesn't really want to and take over his father's company.

When he's done telling the story, they hear Blair mutter something in her slumber. They all turn to her, and watch her raise an arm to point a sleepy finger at Louis. Then she falls back asleep. Louis seems tense, and Dan laughs, telling him to relax. Blair just likes French people.

They keep drinking and laughing until they realize it's already dawn. They are all pretty wasted, and Louis decides to go back to his hotel. Before he leaves, Serena pulls him into a kiss. When she pulls away, she is smiling, biting slightly her lip and flashing her eyelashes. It makes Dan laugh. Serena is back.

When Blair wakes up, it's noon. She is in her bed, in her underwear and Dan is sleeping next to her. If all the others feel like she does, right now, no one is probably going to class, today. Dan feels her move and awakes with a groan. Blair frowns at him.

"I feel like there is something I should remember" she whispers, thinking about the previous night.

Dan rubs a hand on his face "You know what, me too"

After a little morning make out, they dress up to go downstairs for coffee. When they reach the bottom of the stairs, they spot Nate and Vanessa sleeping on the couch. They are tangled with one another, looking so very peaceful. Blair turns to Dan.

"See what I was talking about?"

Dan laughs, and leads her to the kitchen. Serena is already there in her silk robe, holding a mug of coffee. Blair reaches for it, taking two long sips before passing it to Dan who finishes it. Serena growls at them and takes out four other mugs.

They drink in silence, trying to lower the pounding in their heads. Vanessa joins them, eyes barely open.

"I hate daylight" she says, taking Dan's mug from his hands.

He lets her and pours more coffee into an empty one while Vanessa sits with them around the kitchen island. Nate comes into the kitchen just a few minutes later. He looks at all of them sleepily, and a bit more awake when he sees Vanessa. He walks toward her, takes her face between his hands and puts a kiss on her forehead. Blair's hand goes to grab Dan's arm, making him hiss in pain.

"Happy Birthday" they hear Nate say to Vanessa.

"That's what I should've remembered" Dan sighs as he rubs his arm "Happy Birthday"

Serena tells her too, and Vanessa smiles at them. Blair lets Nate take away her mug, realizing that Vanessa's birthday is probably what she was forgetting too. She wishes her while pouring herself another mug of coffee, slightly annoyed with herself. Vanessa must have told her during the past week, and as much as Blair would have tried not to care, it had anchored viciously into her memory. Still, there is something inside of her that leaves her quite uneasy. She ignores a voice in her head telling her that it's perhaps just a slight guilt of not remembering sooner.

This friendship thing is really getting out of hands.

X

Dan has barely been home from his last class when Blair calls him.

"Hey, I was going to come over to your place" he says when he picks up "What do you think of Hitchcock for tonight?"

"We'll see. I'm outside your door" she says "But don't open it"

Dan stops himself from moving toward the front door.

"Why?"

"I know Georgina is back in town, and I know you met with her at least once"

Dan takes a long breath. He thinks of asking how she knows, but it doesn't really matter. The fact is, she knows he hid something from her.

"I was going to tell you" he says "I just…I don't know why I didn't. It's not a very easy subject for me"

"I know. Believe me. I was just worried" Blair's voice makes him feel even sorrier than he already is "I didn't know how you were handling it, and I wanted to be there for you, but you didn't give me the chance"

Dan doesn't answer, because everything she says is right.

"Don't shut me out, Dan" she says "Too many people have before, and I don't want you to be one of them"

"I wasn't shutting you out" Dan is quick to correct "I swear I wasn't. It's just that Georgina and Milo are part of the past, now. It felt great to see him, but it ends there. She got married and…it's in the past"

He hears Blair sigh.

"I know that you keep his pacifier behind Cedric" she says.

Dan wonders just how much she knows, and simply waits for him to tell her.

"I gave it back" he says "When I met them the other day, and it was only once by the way, I gave it back to him. I'm moving on. Finally"

"Okay"

"It's in the past now" he repeats "And you are my future"

He doesn't hear Blair answer, but he knows she is still there.

"Can I open the door now?"

Blair takes a sharp breath.

"Yes. But before you do, I want you to know that what I have here isn't some way to replace him, Milo"

"What do you mean?"

"I just remembered what you said about not being afraid of the long run, when it comes to us. I wanted to show you that I am in, completely in. And this was the only way I found how to do it"

Dan walks to the door, and opens it because he has to see what Blair is talking about. She is standing on the threshold, and she has a leash in the hand that isn't holding the phone to her ear. The leash is connected to a Newfoundland black dog, sitting next to her on the floor. He is enormous, and looks up at Dan with interest. Blair hangs up.

"Dan, meet Léon" she says.

Dan snaps out of his numb state, and looks back at Blair.

"You got me a dog"

"I got us a dog" Blair corrects.

Dan looks back down to Léon.

"Let me guess, he'll live at the loft with me"

"And I'll take care of buying the food and taking him to the veterinarian" Blair nods. She studies Dan's face "You don't want him?"

Dan laughs. He steps aside to let Blair in with the dog. After closing the door, he takes her in his arms.

"You are…" he trails off "I don't know what you are, but it's enough for me to be completely speechless. Of course I want him. I want anything that I can share with you"

Blair sighs in relief, responding to his tight embrace.

"Thank God, I don't think I would have had the heart to bring him back"

Dan laughs again "Where did you get him, anyway?"

"Animal Shelter"

Dan genuinely chokes on the air he breathes.

"You went to an animal shelter?"

Blair fiddles with the leash, giving a light shrug.

"Perhaps I sent Dorota" she says.

Dan nods, and crouches down to look at the dog. He takes one of his paws.

"Well, welcome to your new home Léon"

When he gets back up, Blair tells him with a smile that she already bought everything to take care of the dog, and that the driver downstairs is waiting for him to come pick them up.

There are two boxes. Dog shampoo, three different kinds of brush, four different colors of leather collars, all with a little golden bone pendant with _Léon_ engraved on them –and the matching leashes of course. Then Dan sees toys, and a giant pillow doghouse filled with all sorts of cushions.

When he finally has everything inside the loft, Blair is calling Pizza delivery, and informs him that they will be watching _The Philadelphia Story_, tonight. Dan sighs, but doesn't protest.

As they are on the couch, watching the movie on his computer, Dan gets barely distracted by the presence of the dog simply lying on the floor. He is so quiet; it feels like he's always been there with them. The movie is almost over when Dan feels Blair's head falling against his shoulder.

By the time the ending credits roll, Léon is the last one awake. He yawns and leaves his new masters on the couch, settling for Dan's bed.

* * *

_So yes, Louis is there now. And yes, this is me taking the opportunity to give life to my secret ship Lourena. I don't know, I just always thought that they could have somethig much more meaningful that Blair and Louis always had, with the way they were always willing to step out of their original social position._

_Anyway, of course all the others are going to find out who he is in the next chapter. Chuck is coming back (again) and he'll be in each chapters until this fic ends (three chapters to go already!) also Georgina is gonna be there, and Charlie/Ivy too! And of course, Léon, more Léon._

_Hope you liked this chapter, I know it was a bit short, but so much happened._

_In any case, I love you all guys!_

_xo_


	6. Chapter 6

_Hi lovelies! Hope everything is fine for you all!_

_Happy Valentine's Day!_

_This chapter was long, and challenging. I try to have a kind of a theme for every chapter, and this one was about finding the right balance between showing Dan and Blair enjoying their youth, while slightly making steps forward into adulthood, together and on their own._

_Hope I managed. Anyway, read it, and tell me!_

_Enjoy!_

* * *

Dan puts a sleepy hand on Blair's hip under the coversheet.

"Blair" he mutters "Léon wants to go out"

Blair slightly stirs at the sound of his voice, only to burry herself deeper into the bed.

"I can't go" she answers in her pillow "I'm naked"

"So am I" Dan shakes her softly "Come on, get dressed. It's your turn"

Blair sighs. She pulls one arm from under the cover to reach for the bell on her nightstand she sometimes uses to summon Dorota. Her fingertips have barely brushed the bronze handle when Dan's hand stops her.

"If you ring that bell at six in the morning, I swear I will have Léon pee on your shoes. I'm not kidding"

Blair moans in annoyance, and gets out of the bed. She puts her silk pajamas on, flat shoes and a trench coat. Léon sits next to the bed, looking at her the whole time, patiently waiting. Giving him a deadly look, Blair clips the leash to his collar, and goes with him.

Having Léon has been fun. He is a quiet dog, and although Blair will never say it out loud in front of Dan, quite fashionable. His dark bright hair goes with everything, and she bought enough different colors of leashes and collars to be sure it'll always match her outfit. He rarely barks, rarely runs, and gets rarely agitated. He is kind of lazy, but Blair likes it this way.

The only thing that is frankly quite annoying is that he likes to go out early in the morning. It doesn't bother Dan, because he is also kind of an early bird. But each time they sleepover at Blair's, he makes her go, saying it's a matter of commitment. After all, she is the one who got them the dog in the first place.

Once, Blair got dressed in her little black dress, and took him with her to Tiffany's. She chewed on her croissant, drinking her coffee and Léon sat next to her, looking at the window shop, completely calm. That was when Blair knew he was definitely worth having.

When she arrives back in front of her building after having walked a full block with him, she stops, spotting Serena arriving. She is not alone; a man walks next to her, dressed into what would be a three piece suit if Serena hadn't had his jacket around the shoulders. Blair assumes it's the Louis Serena said she was going on a date with, the previous night. Léon makes a little noise, probably wondering why they stopped, and Blair pats his head to reassure him.

She smiles when she sees Louis take Serena softly by the neck, and kiss her. It looks so intimate Blair feels a little bit out of place staring. But it's not her fault they are standing in front of her building. When Louis leaves with a last wave and Serena goes in, Blair starts walking with a quick pace, catching up with Serena who is already pushing the elevator button.

"Had a good night?"

Serena jumps a little when she sees her. She smiles.

"He is amazing" she sighs dreamily. They get into the elevator "Such a gentleman, and so sweet and adorable"

Blair smiles too "You know I still have to have him over for tea to approve"

"You would" Serena says "You know, I can't quite believe I'm the kind of girl he would be interested in"

"Serena Van der Woodsen feeling out of someone's league? He must be something, alright"

Serena shrugs, awkward "He is just so, so nice and…simple"

Blair sighs "I know what you mean"

They laugh together entering the penthouse. Blair unleashes Léon, letting him lead their way upstairs. She bids Serena sweet dreams before going back to lie down next to Dan. He seems to be sleeping heavily, and Blair slides into the bed as quietly as she can.

As she gets ready to get back to sleep, she can't help taking in the mood of this early morning. She is happy. Léon and Dan make her happy, and seeing Serena happy makes her happy. She just hopes this Louis guy is for real. Dan told her about Serena having anxiety attacks, and she knows the last thing her friend needs is someone else screwing her over. Blair genuinely hopes that just like Serena said, Louis is just nice and –

Blair's body jolts upright and she slaps Dan on the cheek out of pure reflexive shock.

"He is the Prince of Monaco!"

Dan, who instantly woke up under the slap, stares at her in utter confusion.

"What is wrong with you?" he finally manages to ask.

"Serena's new…whatever he is. He is the Prince of Monaco"

Dan closes his eyes "Blair, for the love of God…"

"I know what I'm saying" Blair gets off the bed to take her computer, bringing it back with her. "He was with us after the Pink Party right? I recognized him, and I wanted to tell you guys, but I was too tired"

"Too wasted" Dan corrects "And you might still be"

"Then the morning after, I felt I was forgetting something, and I thought it was Vanessa's birthday but it was this! He is the prince of Monaco"

Blair turns the screen toward Dan. His jaw drops. Right there, on Google Images, are thousands of pictures of Louis, the guy who just two days earlier came over to his place with Nate to watch a soccer game, prince of Monaco.

"Holy shit!" Dan gets closer to the screen "He said he was just a French guy who wanted to visit New York before having to merger in business and take over his father's company"

Blair shakes her head, incredulous "The merger is probably an arranged marriage, and the father's company is a Principality"

Dan curses again under his breath. This is probably the weirdest morning of his entire life.

"Do you think Serena knows?" he asks Blair.

Blair shakes her head, and then becomes still. She is frowning, gazing in the air, lost in her thoughts.

"Oh this is just _so typical_" she exclaims.

Dan looks at her with inquiry. Blair doesn't notice him, but shuts her computer sharply.

"I was the happy one" she starts ranting "I was the one who had it all, and she was the one struggling. Then a Prince shows up and she gets the castle and I'm stuck in Brooklyn"

Dan shoots her a look. Blair bites her lip, grimacing a little before turning to him.

"It's a reflex. I'll get over it, I'm very happy with you. Obviously"

"Obviously" Dan repeats, sarcastic "So do we tell her?"

Blair sighs "I'll do it. Later. Right now, let's just forget about it and go back to sleep"

"Fine"

Dan lies back under the covers, turning his back to her. Blair sighs, and hugs him from behind.

"Are you upset about what I said? About being stuck in Brooklyn?" she asks in a whisper.

Dan shrugs. Blair forces him to turn and brings him to rest on her chest. He lets her.

"I can't compete with Monaco, you know" he mutters in her pajamas.

"Brooklyn has you. Game over" she says.

Dan buries his face in her chest to hide his smile, but Blair sees it anyway. They fall back asleep this way. When Blair wakes up a few hours later, Dan is gone and Léon took his place on the bed next to her. On her nightstand, there is a note on which lays a key.

_Gone to my 9:00 am class. You can bring Léon back to the loft. Keep the key_.

X

"What do you mean, Nate is dating Raina Thorpe?"

Serena takes a step back under Blair's murderous glare.

"Don't kill the messenger" she says "It's all over Gossip Girl, anyway"

Blair takes a deep breath, trying to lower her annoyance. What is Raina Thorpe still even doing in New York, anyway? First Chuck, now Nate who clearly belongs with Vanessa. Blair wonders if she even knows.

Since everything is going well with Dan and in college, Blair finds that she has way enough time to think about her friends' love lives. She likes to think that she selflessly wants them to be as happy as she is, but Dan tells her that she just needs to be in control of something.

It's not like they don't need her help, anyway. When she told Serena about Louis, it forced him to come forward and reveal his identity to everyone. Of course, Blair had her doubts, not even royalty makes up for lying. But he gave them the excuse that he simply wanted to be someone free of all royal things before having to endorse his title, and the way he looked at Serena when he apologized made Blair melt a little.

So she put him on probation, and he managed quite well. Louis speaks five languages, has impeccable manners and is always so interested by anything American. Blair put her metaphorical approval stamp the day he offered Léon a toy. Then there was the arrival of Cousin Charlie. Blair has no right to say anything about her, because she is family. But it doesn't mean she has to like her. One night, as they were trying out a new wine bar, Dan managed to make Blair admit that she might be a bit jealous; now Serena has Charlie, and Louis, and they barely even spend time together.

So it's only natural that she decides to focus on Nate and Vanessa, who still play this game of 'let's be friends and pretend we're not still in love with each other' and which Blair finds maddening. She keeps setting up meetings with the three of them, and cancels at the last minute. They are onto her, of course, but they never do anything to stop her. But now, Raina Thorpe comes along, and ruins everything. Blair briefly wonders how Chuck feels about that too.

The urge of a takedown boils in her veins. Blair feels like Incredible Hulk of scheming. If she doesn't distract herself, she might do something she'll regret. She leaves Serena in the kitchen and calls out Léon from downstairs. If there is someone that will tell her whether she is being rational or not, it's Dan.

When she gets out of the cab in Brooklyn, she is not ready to see Georgina Sparks leaving Dan's building. Georgina sees her, glances quickly at Léon, and then smiles at her.

"Blair" she says.

"What are you doing here?"

"Catching up with an old friend" she shrugs.

She puts her sunglasses on, and gets into her waiting town car. Blair slams the car door and goes up the stairs, her heels stomping hard on the ground. When she opens the door to the loft, it's to find Dan sitting on the couch, and Milo on his lap.

He looks up at her, looking tetanized and Blair takes a sharp breath.

"You have got to be kidding"

"Wait, Blair" Dan puts Milo in the baby walker on the ground and stands up "Don't be mad"

"I am furious" Blair says, dodging his touch "What is Georgina's spawn doing here?"

Dan crosses his arms "His name is Milo. Georgina's husband is out of town, and she had an impromptu meeting at the bank. She doesn't have a nanny yet, so she asked if I could watch him for a couple of hours"

"And you said yes, of course"

Dan gives a sharp nod, defiant. Blair lets go of Léon's leash.

"She is trying to make her way back into your life" Blair says

"It's not like that"

"She is a crazy person, Dan"

"She's changed"

"Has she? Was it before or after she had you raise her son as your own? You told me it was in the past"

Dan sighs, turning to glance at Milo. When he turns back to Blair, he looks to the floor.

"Perhaps it's not completely" he whispers.

Blair bites the inside of her cheek "Okay. What happened to not hiding things from me then?"

"I was going to tell you" Dan looks up at her and adds "After"

"Okay" Blair fidgets, trying to remember why she came over in the first place. She can't. Everything is blank. She looks at Milo behind Dan "I don't hate him, or anything. But she will use him to hurt you. And I don't want that"

"She won't. She was protecting him, the first time. She didn't mean to hurt me"

Blair shakes her head "Dan, you don't know her like I do. Tell me this is the first, and last time that you agree to this"

"I can't tell you that. If she needs me, for him, I won't turn her down, you know who I am" Dan hesitates before stepping forward and taking softly her arms "Blair, don't be mad"

She pushes his arms away, refusing to look at him.

"I have to go" she whispers, walking to the door.

"Really?" Dan asks before she goes "We survived Chuck, we survived Serena, we even got through my sister, but you're going to let Georgina Sparks be our weak link?"

"Don't you get it, Dan?" Blair opens the door and turns to look at him "This isn't some disagreement about Degas or Damien Hirst. This is life and something that we will never agree on"

They stare at each other for a moment. She doesn't want to go, really and he doesn't want her to. But the point she rose floats heavily in the air; this is something they probably won't ever agree on. Dan goes to sit back on the couch, and starts to play with Milo, leaving her the choice.

From the corner of his eyes, he sees her disappear behind the door.

X

Dan waits until the week end to go see Blair, hoping she would have cooled off by now.

When he gets inside the penthouse, he goes directly up to Blair's room. He stops in the hallway. There is music coming out of her room, guitar and battery sounds; not the kind Blair usually listens to. And Dan can smell something, something like weed.

He pushes Blair's door open without knocking, afraid of what he is going to find. What he finds is Blair laying on her stomach on the bed, laughing at Vanessa who is lying on the carpet, a lit joint in her hand. They are both laughing and Dan doesn't know if he is dreaming or not. It takes them a few seconds to notice him, and when they do, they laugh even more.

"Uh oh" Vanessa says, sitting up "We're busted"

She stands up to pass the joint to Blair who takes a final drag before going to throw it out the open window.

"What…are you…what…" Dan doesn't know what to ask, doesn't know what to think. He can only stare at them, who stare back at him, both with a little smile on their faces.

"Abrams and I seem to have moments of mutual understanding" Blair says, getting off the bed.

Dan cannot focus on anything else than her when she comes to greet him with a kiss. Vanessa is already not paying attention anymore, so Dan takes Blair softly by the arms, and leans down to her.

"Are we good?" he whispers

Blair opens her mouth to say nothing, then shrugs nonchalantly, turning away to go back on the bed. This isn't an answer. Dan wonders just how high she is. He is about to ask Vanessa to give them a moment when they hear someone call from downstairs. Blair and Vanessa immediately run down the stairs, giggling like two little girls. Dan follows.

Louis is in Blair's foyer, dressed in his usual matching trousers and blazer, flowers in hand.

"I was supposed to meet Serena" he tells Blair nervously, like he is talking to Serena's mother.

"She went to poker with Chuck, she'll be back shortly" Blair takes the flowers away before he has the time to say anything "Why don't you wait with us?"

Louis accepts, and goes to sit nervously on the couch. Dan doesn't know if he should stay or not, but decides to, in the end. Perhaps Blair's behavior toward him will give him an indication on where they stand.

The only problem is, her behavior sends mixed signals. She doesn't ignore him, but she doesn't pay much attention either. He figures that perhaps she is just high; he ought to have a conversation with Vanessa about that. The girls go up to Blair's room and come back down with the weed. It just seems out of character to Dan. He watches her, dressed in her classy dress and pearl necklace, looking so very Upper East Side precious and yet, a joint that she is about to light up between her lips.

"We should let His Highness go first" Vanessa points a Louis "In gage of a proper welcoming"

"I've never tried before" Louis says, looking at Blair with interest.

And it's like time stops. The joint falls from Blair's mouth.

"Never?" Dan asks Louis, forgetting about all of his worries. When Louis shakes his head with a shrug, Dan frowns so much that his eyes squint "Never ever?"

"It's not really appreciated, back home. You know, in the castle"

Blair picks up the joint, and hands it to him, along with a lighter.

"Well, there is a first time for everything"

Louis loses his blazer. He takes the joint cautiously and lights it. When he takes the first drag, and coughs a little, Blair and Vanessa cheer happily. Dan can't help joining them, because he is witnessing a prince smoking weed for the first time in Blair Waldorf's foyer, and yes, this is his life, now.

By the time Louis passes the joint to Vanessa, the elevator announces an arrival. Serena stumbles out of it, leaning against Chuck supporting her. She claps happily when she sees Louis, and goes to sit on his lap, hugging him tight. Chuck sees the joint in Vanessa's hands and steps in too. Dan tries not to look at him.

"Are you drunk?" Louis asks Serena with a smile "It's seven in the evening"

"We were at poker, and a glass of scotch is mandatory" Chuck explains, taking the joint that Vanessa is passing him "But Serena and I might have had a fewer more than mandatory"

"You don't look drunk" Louis tells him.

"He's Chuck Bass" Dan is not only surprised to hear himself say that, but even more that Vanessa, Serena and Blair said it along with him.

The girls giggle, and Louis seems impressed by their symbiosis when it comes to claiming Chuck's identity. Chuck smokes, shrugging. He stays there, to the point of taking a seat, and Blair never tells him that he is not welcome anyway. It only feels weird to Dan until he gets the joint. Blair takes her cellphone, and calls Nate over, telling him to leave his Midwest girlfriend behind if she doesn't want a hairtini.

When Nate arrives, Dan can't help notice he stands as far from Chuck as possible. They break into Cyrus and Eleanor's wine cave, and start drinking. Dan laughs along with the others, trying get into the lightened mood. But it's only when Blair comes to sit next to him, putting her head on his shoulder and giggling at something Serena said that he really starts to relax, and enjoy the night. He sits back, an arm around her shoulder. It feels good to be a college student.

They've been drinking, and smoking and laughing for a few hours, and Serena frowns slightly after finishing her glass.

"Do we have a drinking problem?" she wonders out loud.

They all think about it for a moment. Then they all shake their heads. Louis nods vigorously, though.

The next morning, Dan wakes up in Blair's bed when the sun hits his face. His head is heavy, which not surprising at all, and his body feels a bit sore. He reaches out sleepily to touch Blair, but just finds the soft sheet under his hand. Sitting up, he gathers all of his courage to open his eyes.

Blair is sitting at her dressing table, all dressed for the day, and brushing her hair. She looks at his reflection in the glass. Dan drags himself out of the bed to go to her. He leans down, and presses a kiss on her cheek.

"Good morning" he whispers with another kiss on the top of her head.

"Good morning" she answers softly.

Dan takes in the way her eyes seem to fly anywhere but on his face, like she is avoiding watching him.

"What's up?" he asks, wondering if he really should.

Blair puts down the brush slowly, and takes a pearl earring. She fiddles with it, looking down, a slight crease between her eyebrows.

"My mother is landing this afternoon" she says "I'm going to spend some time with her. Just wanted to let you know that you might not see a lot of me in the next few days"

Dan looks at her through the mirror, but her head is still bent down. She only lifts it up when she hears him move away from her. She watches as he starts dressing himself, worn out jeans and shirt. He doesn't even put his shoes on before going to the door. He doesn't even look at her either.

He stops, his hand on the handle, and Blair catches her breath, waits for the accusations. But he ends up sighing, and makes his wait out. The slam of the door closing rings loudly in her ears, channels in her heart.

X

Since he didn't blame her out loud, she does it herself, silently. Yes, she shouldn't have made believe that everything was okay, when it really wasn't. In her defense, she was drunk and high, and she just wanted to feel him close to her. Once she woke up, completely sober, she remembered how he made it seem like she was heartless and like she couldn't understand, when all she actually wanted to do was to protect him.

Blair distracts herself with the visit of her mother, but it doesn't last very long –as usual, she has something more important to do somewhere else in the world than in New York with her daughter. Since Nate is in honeymoon phase, and she won't even consider talking to Chuck about the weather, Blair only has Louis to give her advice, from a man's perspective.

For a prince who hasn't led the same kind of life, he turns out to be very insightful. He tells her it's because he used to watch _Dallas_ when he was little. In the end, his advice is to reach out to Dan, and simply explain. In fact, he has the perfect opportunity for her to do so.

Louis explains to Blair how is family is getting tired of him expending his stay in New York every week, and is coming to see him. They are setting up a ball, which is really a reason for him to meet eligible New York girls. He got Serena into the list, even though she didn't want to. Louis confesses to Blair that he was hoping his family would meet Serena, and fall for her the way he did, and it takes Blair's breath away. A prince is in love with her best friend, and is making sure the protocol allows him to be with her.

Blair receives an invitation two days later, along with a Dior vintage ball gown. She takes her time to call Dan, and asks if he got the invitation too. Dan confirms, but tells her he doesn't plan on going, using classes as an excuse. Blair doesn't have time to say much else before he hangs up. She considers calling him back to yell away her frustrations in his ears. Luckily, Vanessa comes in at that moment, asking explanations as to why she was just delivered a three thousand dollars dress.

Blair decides that she is going to go, support Serena and have fun. She is not going to let Dan Humphrey and his brooklynness stop the fact that she is friends with a real life prince. The only thing that could ruin her night is that Serena got her cousin Charlie invited too.

The ball takes place in a gigantic old mansion, a bit out of the city. A valet brings them to their table. Blair walks around it, looking at the little name cards on the plates. _Charles Bass, Charlotte Rhodes, Nathaniel Archibald, Vanessa Abrams, Serena Van der Woodsen, Blair Waldorf, Daniel Humphrey. _She takes the last card between her fingers, and stops the bittersweet feeling in her guts before flipping in upside down, so she won't have to look at it.

Except when they are all sitting, she cannot ignore the empty chair next to her. She focuses on making fun of any girl that isn't Serena with Vanessa and Nate. She notices the way Nate leans slightly toward Vanessa, the way Charlie blushes every time Chuck talks to her, the way Louis who is standing next to his mother looks only at Serena, a smile on his face.

After the entrées, the conductor of the orchestra playing announces that the prince shall open the dance, and Louis crosses the room and holds out his hand to Serena. She takes it with a smile, and all the eyes in the room are upon them. People start joining in, Blair watches in awe. Everything is just so mesmerizing; she can't believe she is actually there. Chuck invites Charlie to dance. Nate smiles at Vanessa, stands up and invites her as well, with a little reverence. Vanessa glances quickly at Blair, who smiles too, showing her she'll be alright.

She watches all of them, she watches different kinds of love dance around in front of her. There is the open, obvious one; Louis and Serena. They are both smiling, eyes closed, cheek to cheek, mouths separated by only a little space, like they barely refrain to kiss. There is the denied one; Nate and Vanessa, who talk and grin stupidly, but avoid each other's eyes. There is the perhaps blooming feeling, the first stage of attraction of the red on Charlie's cheek and the way she giggles at whatever Chuck is telling her.

Then she stops watching them, because the more she does, the more she misses Dan, and his brooklynness.

"You look stunning"

Blair's heart misses a beat, and she looks up to see Dan standing next to her. He is wearing a suit, while every other man is in tuxedo and it seems to be the perfect metaphor for everything he is. Blair doesn't know what she feels, but it's still too much for her to handle, so she looks back to the dance floor, not really seeing anything.

She feels Dan sit next to her. Her body freezes when she feels his hand cover hers on the table. Then she relaxes, and she turns her hand so their palms touch, and their fingers link. She hears him sigh of relief. He leans forward to rest his forehead against her shoulder.

"I thought you were mad at me for telling you the truth about Georgina" she says.

"I was mad at you for making me believe that everything was alright between us, when it really wasn't"

Their tone sounds rather harsh, but he gets reassured by the soft hold of their hands. He pulls on it, making her stand with him and bringing her to the dance floor with him. They start moving slowly around, and after a few steps, Blair puts her head against his chest. She missed him, she realizes again. More than she ever thought possible.

"I realized that I expected you to understand something that I never explained" Dan whispers in her hair "And that's because I perhaps don't understand it myself"

Blair's hand tightens on his shoulder, and she remains silent.

"I know Milo isn't mine. I'm just the guy who looked after him for the first month of his life. But there was a time when I thought he was my son, and you know, I really did love him. I don't think I could ever really explain the feeling, because it's impossible to explain what it feels like to be a parent. But I shouldn't blame you for not knowing what it is"

He presses Blair closer, and she lets him, to the point where they're barely moving. When she doesn't hear him talk again, she looks up. Their eyes lock like the way they always seem to whenever they're close to each other, now.

"I think that if I could have any impact on his life, I'd want to take the chance. Can you imagine what having Georgina Sparks as a mother is going to be like?"

It's not a joke, but Blair still wants to laugh at the thought. She doesn't.

"I know it's pretentious, but what if I can bring him something good?" Dan swallows hard "And perhaps you're right, perhaps it'll backfire. And I also know it might be a lot to ask but…can I ask you to be in this with me? Because I really don't know what to do, when you're not around"

By now, they have stopped moving completely. Blair's glare loses focus on him. He sees her look down, before she goes back to rest her head on his chest.

"Okay" she says. Her hand leaves his shoulder to go up and curl around his neck "Okay" she repeats.

Dan feels instantly lighter with relief, and heavy with gratitude. He feels in Blair's hold how much she cares, and he doesn't think anyone has ever been this good to him. He leans down to kiss her, and she kisses back. It feels so good to have her back, this way.

"Come with me" he whispers against her lips.

He pulls Blair by the end, delighted by the simple sound of her heels clicking with a quick pace on the floor behind him, like a proof that she would follow him anywhere.

X

He finds an empty dark bedroom, the kind that is probably just there for decoration. Inside, he pushes Blair against the closed door. She laughs against his lips, whispers about how they shouldn't, but starts undoing his tie.

He tells her against her neck that he missed her, more than he ever thought he could, and it makes Blair smile. She urges him to hurry up, before someone finds them and makes a mental note to stop making love to him in public places. Dan obliges, his hands pushing up her long dress around her hips and rolling her lace underwear down her thighs.

Something shifts in her brain when he presses two fingers inside of her and starts working them in and out. She kisses him, getting oblivious of anything that isn't him. Then he stops moving. Blair opens her eyes, and sees him focus on something else. She falls back on earth, and hears it too. Footsteps, coming their way.

"Oh my God" she pushes him away, and puts her panties back on.

"Relax, we'll find a way out of here" Dan starts to turn around on his spot, looking for a possible exit.

"Humphrey, if we get kicked out of a royal ball for inappropriate behavior, I swear I will kill you, and then I will kill your penis!"

"Well that's something I'll never let you near again" Dan says as he spots another door in the darkness. He takes her hand "Come on"

Just right when the door opens, they get into the adjacent room and find it to be a bathroom. Dan almost exclaims in happiness when he sees that there is a door leading to a balcony. It's not locked, but tricky enough to open that he has to let go of Blair's hand. When he turns around to warn her to be quiet, he finds Blair with her ear pressed on the door.

"What are you doing?" he whispers.

Blair shows him to shut up, and listens closely. Then she doesn't have to, because they can hear a man's voice coming through the door.

"I missed you so much"

Dan and Blair both stretch their eyes, recognizing Nate's voice. Then a woman's gasp and a moan.

"Nate, we can't"

And it's Blair's turn to restrain a cry of joy, while Dan puts his hands over his ears in disgust as they recognize Vanessa's voice. Dan turns back and starts pulling on the balcony door, frenetic, all decisions to be discreet forgotten. He turns to ask Blair's help, and sees her peeking through the keyhole.

"What. Are you. Doing?" he whispers furiously.

"Relax, I can't see much anyway, just that they settled for the desk. Oh, pants are coming off"

"Blair, step away from this door, right now!"

"Shut up, Humphrey! They're going to hear!" Blair giggles a bit, squeezing her eyes "I think it's starting"

"Oh, Lord"

His prayer gets heard, because the door flies open under his pull with a little crack.

"Did you hear something?" Vanessa's voice asks between breaths.

There is only a grunt from Nate as an answer, and Dan leans down to pull Blair. She resists.

"You should really see this, Humphrey" she whispers "Go, Archibald!"

"There is something wrong with you"

Blair freezes, then steps away from the door like she got burnt.

"Okay, I've seen too much, let's go"

She leads the way to the balcony. There is no way down, and Dan leans over the edge to see if they can jump; it's only the first floor. He carefully makes his way over it, Blair keeps a hand on his shoulder, worried. Dan lets himself hang before letting go, bracing himself for the fall. He lands on his feet, loses balance just a bit. Then he holds his arms up.

"Come on, I'll catch you"

"_Oh Romeo, Romeo_!" Blair gasps, a hand over the heart "_Wherefore art thou Romeo_?"

"Blair, come down this instant"

"Buzz kill"

Blair takes off her shoes and throws them over, almost blinding Dan with one of her heels. She hesitates before passing her leg over the edge, then another one. Dan steps closer, to be right under her and tells her to let go. Blair presses her eyes shut, and does so. She is in the air for only a second before she feels Dan's strong hold around her. He puts her down on the ground, the grass tickles her bare feet, and she kisses him.

They walk swiftly through the garden, around the mansion.

"Look" Dan whispers to Blair.

She turns to what he is pointing discreetly at her. Under the moonlight, half hidden by the leaves of a willow against which they lean, Louis and Serena are kissing. Blair sighs.

"Love is all around" she says dreamily, and Dan makes fun of her for that.

She hits him and takes his phone out of his pocket. He watches her snap a picture of Louis and Serena before sending it to her phone.

"I really never realized how much of into voyeurism you are" he says, shaking his head.

"Shut up, Mr. _Rear Window. _I took it to show it to her later, it's too beautiful for her not to know what it looks like."

They go back in to grab her purse. Their table is the only empty one, Chuck and Charlie are still dancing. Blair leads Dan to the car waiting for her return. She gives the driver her address before kissing Dan.

"I don't know if I should leave Léon alone all night" he whispers against her lips.

"Brooklyn is too far away, and it's only one night, Humphrey" She rolls her eyes when she sees him hesitate "You don't know what to do when I'm not around, remember?"

Dan smiles, and kisses her.

"_For where thou art, there is the world itself; and where thou art not, desolation_"

X

When they get home, they open a bottle of white wine in her room. Blair puts _For me, Formidable _on, and Dan makes her twirl around her bed. She takes _Much Ado About Nothing_ off her shelf, and starts reading her favorite passages. Dan listens, then falls asleep with a smile on his face.

Blair undresses him, because she doesn't want his suit to wrinkle, then lies next to him.

She watches him sleep, thinking back about the last few days, and the night they just spent. She thinks of the way she so easily accepted when he asked her on an adventure with him, of the way it only made sense to her to follow him. She believes him, when he says that he just would like to have some sort of good impact on Milo's life, and she admires him like she hasn't admire anyone her own age, ever.

Dan is good, she realizes. He doesn't expect anything in return, he is just simply good. She spent so much time in the Upper East Side, where people don't do things for others if they don't have an agenda that she couldn't even see at first what this story with Milo was all about. But she gets it, now. Dan is good. And she decides he is never going to get hurt because of it, because she'll be there to protect him.

It's too hot for the season, even in the middle of the night, and it prevents her to sleep. She doesn't even know how to turn on the air conditional –Dorota is the one who does it –so Blair drags her princess self to the windows, and opens them, letting the cool air in.

When she goes back to her bed, she hears noises in Serena's room. Apparently, she came home with Louis.

Blair closes her eyes, and starts willing herself to sleep. Then there is no point, because Louis and Serena start getting really loud. Blair opens her eyes, wonders if she was cursed to hear her friends having sex when she hasn't in a while. The incident with Nate and Vanessa was comical, but now Blair is tired, and she doesn't want to listen for an hour to Louis doing not so royal things to Serena.

Which is exactly what happens.

When it stops, Blair is still fully awake, and a bit worked up. She looks over at Dan who is still blissfully asleep, and she thinks, what the hell. She shifts to nestle against his side, and starts kissing his neck, laying a hand flat on his stomach. Dan stirs a bit in his sleep, and when he pulls her closer, Blair just wants him. Bad.

She trails kisses on his skin until her mouth lands on his, and her hands makes its way down, diving under his briefs.

"Blair" he groans sleepily "I'm tired"

"No man has ever complained while having a woman's hand on their ding dong, Humphrey" she wraps her hand around him "Don't be the first one"

Dan laughs, and opens his eyes to look down at her. She can see that he is getting turned on.

"Please say 'ding dong' again" he chuckles, before kissing her.

Blair doesn't, but starts stroking him with intent, and Dan hisses.

"If we do it, it's going to be fast, because I'm really tired" he whispers.

"God, Humphrey! Don't make me beg, just give it to me!"

It makes Dan laugh again. Then he rolls her on her back before getting rid of her silk nightdress. Blair settles her head back against the pillow, satisfied when she feels his mouth close on one of her breasts. His tongue swirls around the peak, making her grab the sheets.

"We'll have to be quiet" he says, and his breath cools the humid trail he left on her skin, making her bristle "Because I don't think Serena will appreciate hearing us"

"She didn't seem to mind us hearing her with Louis, up until fifteen minutes ago"

Dan starts working his mouth on the other breast.

"Mmh, so that's what this is about. You really have a kink"

"It's not about them, or about anyone" Blair whispers. She takes his hand, and brings it down, making it dip pass the lace of her panties so he can feel how wet she already is "It's about you doing this to me"

Dan grunts against her skin, it vibrates in her entire body. He gets rid of her underwear before pulling her legs up. Blair bites her lip, holding back a moan as his tongue laps slowly over her folds. She grabs the sheets again, harder this time. Dan continues to lick slowly, not missing any of what's going on over her face. He sees her mouth part slowly, and the tip of her tongue peaks out to slightly lick her upper lip.

It makes him moan against her, and Blair cries out. Dan hears her whisper something between gasps, but cannot quite perceive. When he can, it makes him so incredibly hard, he doesn't think he can last much longer without being inside of her. But he fights for control, and brings a hand where his mouth is already driving her crazy. He slowly slides his middle finger in her slick warmth, and Blair is back to biting her lip.

"Is it what you wanted?" he asks, even though he already knows the answer.

Blair nods, gasping even more. Dan brings his head down, and devotes his mouth to the little bud peaking up between her folds. When he feels her close, her thighs closing around him, he grabs her with both hands by the waist to keep her still. He closes his eyes too, wanting to focus only on the sounds she makes for him as she comes apart under him.

Blair's body relaxes on the mattress while Dan makes his way back up with kisses on her skin. He gets rid of his underwear, impatient before grabbing a condom and rolling it onto him. Then he lays between her still open thighs.

"Now, miss Waldorf" he whispers "I seem to recall you asking me to 'give it to you'"

Blair looks him in the eyes, and swallows with anticipation.

"It was much more of an order"

"Then you shall be obeyed"

Before he has time to move, Blair pulls him down into a kiss. He kisses back, her passion channeling through him. When he pulls away, he starts kissing her neck, breathing heavily and Blair starts to let herself go again.

"Turn around"

Blair's eyes fly open. He said it with his head buried in the crook of her neck, but his voice sounded confident. Blair feels tingling in every nerve ending of her body. He hasn't looked up yet, and Blair realizes that he is probably waiting for a reaction. Her hand grazes the back of his neck, fingertips meeting the soft start of his curls.

"On my knees?" she asks in a faint whisper.

She feels his shaft twitch against her thigh. Dan looks up, swallows, then nods. He pulls slightly away to leave room when she starts moving, but never lets his hands off her waist while her body slides around. Blair rests on her knees, her hands holding the wooden headboard of the bed, and it's a good thing her back is turning to him, because Dan thinks he is actually blushing.

He feels her suck in a breath when he moves closer again, and starts kissing her neck. His arm snakes around her, hand dipping between her legs and find her even wetter than he left her earlier. It's what makes his brain shut down before he slides inside of her, sending both of their bodies canting up.

They moan in one voice. Dan starts moving, finding his hips cushioned by her curves every time he slides in. He lets his hands rest on her waist naturally, and is rewarded when he feels her hips moving as she starts meeting his thrusts.

The air around them becomes too thick, and they breathe heavily, a moan sliding in from time to time.

"Harder" she says.

And then Dan has to stop, for a few seconds if he doesn't want to go without her. When he moves again, it's in a strong thrust that makes the bed creak, their skins clap and Blair cry out.

"Again"

So Dan does again, and again, and again and each time she cries out. He sees her knuckles turning white curled around the headboard, and he brings his hands over her, weaving their fingers together and getting enough balance to dive in even harder.

Blair starts saying things that he doesn't really hear, things like _yes_ and _again_. The only thing he is sure of is when she cries his name. It channels through him, in the most delicious way and Dan wants to hear more. Just like he did before entering her, he brings one arm around her and starts stroking between her legs. He hears very clearly when she tells him she is close

"Wait, darling" he grunts in her ear. He kisses her neck "Wait for me"

Blair wants to, but she finds it difficult to when he whispers things like that to him. She takes deep breaths, struggling but managing.

"I love you so much" she says, not even expecting it.

Dan groans, forehead pressed against the back of her head as he starts thrusting even harder. His hand leaves between her legs to go back holding hers, and he twists his head to kiss her.

"Let's go" he whispers on her lips "Come with me, Blair"

And so she goes, shouting out her release and completely aware of his own body going rigid behind as he curses in his height. It lasts longer than Blair expected, and when it's over, they both fall back on the bed, spent, breathless, but their skin bursting.

Dan discards the condom, before pulling Blair's sweaty, panting body against his same own. Everything is still and silent, before Serena's voice rings aloud.

"That was just petty, you guys"

They laugh, and press each other even closer, welcoming with peaceful blissfulness the weave of air coming through the open window over their linked, naked bodies.

X

When Dan hears that the Met has borrowed _Le Déjeuner sur l'Herbe_ from the Musée d'Orsay, he takes Blair the following afternoon.

She gazes at it for a long time, finding that New York or Paris, the painting feels the same. The lightning is slightly different, but it's all the same to her. When she is done, and satisfied with the painting, she turns to gaze at Dan, this time. He sitting on a resting bench, reading the same Victor Hugo's poems collection he had with him the both times they were in France together.

He sits quietly there, patiently waiting for her. He is so good to her, and Blair just feels the need to give back. His birthday is coming up, and Blair knows he has something planned with his family in Hudson.

She goes to sit next to him. He barely looks up from his book, but passes an arm around her shoulders.

"I still don't know what to get you for your birthday" she whispers, looking at the words printed in his book but not reading them.

"I told you, come to Hudson" Dan whispers too.

Blair rolls her eyes "I don't want to meet your family, Humphrey. I'm not ready"

"When will you ever be ready? Come on, Blair. It's my birthday"

She shakes slightly her head, and looks up to him. He is looking back.

"What if they don't like me?" she asks, knowing that there is such a possibility.

Dan laughs, pressing her kiss on her temple "I love you enough for the whole world to hate you"

"Fine" Blair smiles "What if I don't like them?"

"It's okay, we're not that close anyway" he laughs along with her "Come on. If you come, I promise not to try to convince you for Jenny's graduation"

"When do we leave?"

The morning of his birthday, Blair wakes up at the loft to the sound of Rufus playing the guitar. She gets out of Dan's room, and finds him sitting at the table, eating breakfast. Eric is there too, and they listen to Rufus in silence. Blair joins them, stealing Dan's plate from him.

Right before they have to leave, Blair takes out the bottle of Merlot she has for him and which vintage is from the year he was born in. She figured that now he was legally allowed to drink, he should at least do it right.

Dan smiles, and kisses her, whispering a thank you against her lips. Rufus takes out the old car, the one Blair can't stand and they all hop in it, Eric in the front, Dan and Blair in the back, and Léon sitting in the trunk. They make a quick stop on the way to pick up Vanessa.

The ride is long and a bit tiring until Rufus and Eric decide to sing old fashioned songs. Dan joins them, and then Vanessa, even Léon starts whimpering happily and soon, Blair is surrounded. She doesn't mind it that much. It does make her feel like part of the family. When they are close to Dan's mother house, she takes his hand in hers.

He reassures her. His mother already knows her, and Jenny will be too busy with Eric to even notice her presence. Other than that, it's just a couple of distant cousins, and nothing more. When Rufus stops the car, and they all get out, Vanessa and Eric almost run to the house. Rufus follows them calmly, leaving to Dan and Blair the matter of getting Léon out of the trunk.

Blair smoothers out her skirt, makes sure none of her heels wobbles, and fingers tight around Léon's leash, she starts walking. Dan stops her.

"I lied" he says "Twenty-one is kind of a big deal, and there are going to be people from my father's side of the family too. Also, my Nana is there, and she's like an eighty year old racist version of Gossip Girl. And my parents actually connected in the first place because both of their families are made of really loud people. Some of them also have no sense of boundaries, and I'm pretty sure that my cousin Barry is looking at us through the window and already making up in his mind a very inappropriate joke about you"

Blair stops breathing. When she does again, she discreetly reaches out to pinch his thigh. Dan makes a small whimper behind his closed lips.

"Anything else I should know?" she asks

Dan thinks for a moment "Jerry, my father's cousin, lives in Kansas. By choice."

"Oh my God" Blair breathes out.

Dan laughs, and kisses her on the mouth. Someone in the house whistles at them.

"I love you" he whispers

"Yeah, right" Blair answers, bitterly.

He takes her by the hand and leads her toward the house. He feels her shake a little. When they get inside, a beer is put in Dan's free hand and about twenty people start singing _Happy Birthday_. Dan smiles, throughout all the song.

"Thank you" he says loudly when it's over. He puts his hand on Blair's back, gently urging her forward. "Everyone, this is Blair, and this is Léon"

And everyone lifts whatever they are drinking, cheering "Welcome Blair and Léon!"

* * *

_Sooo? How was it? I was so scared to disappoint in this one._

_Next chapter is a special one, and it'll come in the next few days, just enough time to get me to look over it. Confession, it's the first chapter I actually wrote for this fic, even before I finished La Bohème. I do those kind of things sometimes._

_Also, I will be shortly back with not one, but two new chapters of Square One! No I didn't forget about it haha, but I'll explain the delay when I publish the chapter._

_I love you all very much, and may Dair happiness be with you._

_XO_


	7. Chapter 7

_Hi lovelies!_

_It's late, and I'm tired so I won't be rambling much. As I told you at the end of last chapter, this is a special one. I just really wanted to do it, I'm not sure why. Anyway, tell me what you think._

_Enjoy :)_

* * *

Serena doesn't usually like rain. When the sky is grey, and the air is windy, she finds all she wants is to stay in her bed and read. She remembers how Dan used to tease her about it, about the fact that she only reads when there is actually nothing better to do. It seems like an eternity ago.

But today, Serena doesn't stay in her bed. She gets up, she showers, she dresses –it takes her almost an hour, she wants to look good –and with her trench coat on, she leaves, without an umbrella.

Blair is rubbing off on her, with her reenactments of romantic scenarios, because as she walks under the pouring rain, Serena thinks of Holly looking for her cat. It makes her smile, and it makes her sad. Her ending won't be as blissful as Holly's. It will never be.

When she gets to the Ritz, she greets the doorman, and asks him about his wife and kids. She doesn't even remember who she was visiting at the Ritz when she met him, but for some reason, she remembers he lives in New Jersey, and that his wife's name is Rosa.

A little shiver runs through her as she knocks softly on Louis's suite door. She doesn't know if it's from the cold, or from the apprehension. He smiles when he opens the door and sees her standing there. He makes her sit on a leather chair, and brings her a towel so she can dry herself, before preparing her a cup of hot tea. Serena watches him move, thinking in the back of her mind that he doesn't look like a prince.

Louis puts the cup of tea on the coffee table, and goes to squat in front of her. As he leans up, he smiles, even when their lips meet. Serena allows herself to get lost into the kiss, at least one last time.

When he pulls away, he gives her the cup and sits on the coffee table to face her.

"I was going to come by your place later" he says.

"I know. But I wanted to walk, so I figured I might as well come"

Louis nods. He has an easy smile on his face, one that indicates to Serena that he somehow knows what she is going to tell him.

"I suppose you're here to give me your answer" he says.

"I suppose you already know what it is going to be"

"I wish I didn't"

"I can't be a princess, Louis" Serena shakes her head slowly "I can't be the person you want me to be"

Before he can tell her he doesn't want to be anyone else other than her, Serena puts down her cup and takes his hands in hers.

"And I don't want you to lose focus of what you should be because of me. You deserve to be with someone who would be willing to let you be yourself without having to sacrifice themselves"

"Just meet with my family" Louis says, insistent "I'm sure they'll fall in love with you"

"Everybody falls in love with me" Serena smiles "But they fall out of love just as quickly"

"I won't"

"Yes, you will. I know it from experience, believe me"

She lets go of his hands to stand up. He follows her lead, and they stare at each other while she puts on her coat.

"I wish this was in another context" she whispers "I wish you had grown up here or that I had been more suitable"

"Suitable is only a matter of perspective" Louis says "Look at Dan and Blair"

Serena can't help but smile when she hears that.

"It's different" she says.

"How?"

"They are one of a kind. The kind that is written in classic novels and not in tabloids"

He walks her to the door, and kisses her on the threshold. He whispers against her lips that he loves her, and Serena believes him. Every fiber of her body feels it. She lets go of him, and walks back home under the rain. She knows she is crying because her eyes feel hot.

When she gets into the penthouse, she hears noise in the kitchen. Assuming it's Blair, she walks over there. Blair is sitting on the kitchen island, and Dan is standing in front of the counter, flour and apples next to him. Blair smiles when she sees her.

"We're baking a pie" she says.

"We?" Dan raises an eyebrow at her.

"I bought the ingredients"

He chuckles, and looks over at Serena to greet her. She sees him frown.

"Are you okay?" he asks

Serena figures her eyes might be red. She shrugs, deciding to be honest.

"Louis is going back to Monaco"

Both Dan and Blair offer her a sorry look, before Blair steps down from her seat and comes to hug her. Serena hugs back.

"It's okay" she sniffs "I knew how it would end"

"It doesn't mean that it's not sad" Dan says.

"Would you like to join us in pie baking?"

Serena looks at the two of them. She wants to, and she doesn't. She wants to be with her friends, but she doesn't want to bring them down with her mood –or she doesn't want to witness their happiness.

She shakes her head.

"I was heading to Columbia to work on my final project" she says with a smile "I just came back to fetch an umbrella"

Blair presses her shoulder in comfort, and lets her go. Serena goes up to get her umbrella, and when she gets back down, she stops by the kitchen to tell them she is going.

She sees Blair sitting on the counter, next to Dan, criticizing the way he cuts the apples. Dan responds by stuffing her mouth with several slices. She pinches him, and he throws a little bit of flour at her. Blair gasps, and starts ranting about how valuable her dress is; Dan shuts her up with a kiss. Blair eventually stops rambling against his lips and starts kissing back.

Serena looks at them for a while –until she realizes how creepy she is being.

One of a kind, she thinks.

Once she leaves the building, she wonders where to go. She isn't really going to study, and she can't believe Blair bought it. She decides on the New York Public Library. It's always a good place to hang out at, when it rains.

She walks over there, busy thinking about life, something she rarely does. But she thinks it's time for her to do so, time for her to be adult.

She regrets it as she crosses the street to get to the library. Because hadn't she been thinking, she might have noticed the car coming her way. The hit is sudden, she doesn't even realize it until she is on the ground, umbrella flown away, and she hears people scream.

She thinks it hurts, she is not sure. People start gathering around her, asking if she is okay, and she can't answer. All she can do is staring at the library.

Serena realizes then that she is lying in the middle of the street, stuck between the place she came from and the place she wanted to reach, and she barely has the time to think that it is the most ironic metaphor of her whole life there could be, before everything goes to black.

X

Chuck is the first one to get to the hospital, because he was the closest out of all of those Lily could have called. He handles most of the paper work, surprises himself about how much he actually knows of Serena's civil identity.

It's a broken rib, and a slight concussion, they tell him, and Chuck can breathe again. Barely, though. He has been in this hospital once a year, so far, and Serena was there each time. It's always the same scenario. A car and someone close to him hanging for their life.

For some reason, Serena is the one who always escapes and his father was the one to go down. It doesn't really surprise Chuck. Serena is a fighter, he knows it. As for his father, Chuck has never really known who he actually was.

He is waiting in the hallway for the nurse to tell him when he can go and see Serena when he sees Blair arrive. She is walking with a quick step, despite the height of her Manolos and Dan seems to have trouble keeping up with her.

Blair stops in front of him.

"Where is she?" she asks.

It's the first words she has said to him since the apology he gave her, months ago. Chuck tries to ignore the way the sound of her voice sends shivers through his body.

"The doctors are doing final check-ups" he says "A nurse is going to come and tell us when we can see her"

Blair puts a hand flat on her stomach, and she and Dan push out a relieved sigh, as in one person. It annoys Chuck more than he will ever admit.

"You can go if you have work to do" Blair tells him "I'm here, now"

Chuck's jaw clenches. He has always known Blair to be condescending, but it bothers him very much when she chooses to be with him.

"Lily can't leave the penthouse, and I am the only adult family member" he says

"Haven't you already done all the paper work?"

Chuck sees Dan put his hands on her shoulders, and lean down to talk in her ear.

"Blair, he wants to be here" he hears Dan say.

Blair purses her lips, and sits two chairs away from him. Chuck exchanges a look with Dan. He doesn't thank him, but Dan nods in response anyway. Dan says he is going to get some coffee, and asks them if they want anything. Chuck shakes his head, Blair asks for a tea and Dan goes.

Chuck and Blair don't talk, just sit there in silence. A nurse comes and tells them Serena can have visitors. They turn to each other.

"Go" Blair tells him, before looking down to her hands.

Chuck stands up and gets into Serena's room.

She is lying on the hospital bed, wearing a hospital gown. There is a small bruise on her cheek. She smiles at him.

"I should get a membership card" she says.

Chuck laughs with her, before taking a seat.

"Are you feeling okay?" he asks.

Serena nods vigorously "I'm fine. They say I should be out tomorrow morning"

"Good. Your mother is waiting for the judge to give her clearance"

Serena nods again. Chuck loosens his tie.

"Tell me the truth. It wasn't on purpose, was it?"

"It wasn't. I was lost in my thoughts, and I didn't see it coming, that's all"

"Okay" Chuck leans forward to cover her hand with his "How about the anxiety attacks. Had any more of those?"

Serena shakes her head "It stopped. I'm better now"

"Good, then"

A silence settles, before Serena sighs.

"Will you go get me some gelato?" she asks "Before I have to subir hospital food?"

Chuck smiles at her. If she wants gelato, she is okay.

"Sure"

He gets up, puts a kiss on her forehead, and heads out. Blair is standing next to the door, waiting. Chuck indicates her with a smile that she can go in. Blair takes two steps forward, and Chuck steps outside. She turns to him just as he goes.

"Are you okay?" she asks.

Their eyes lock. He knows she is talking about Bart. For a few seconds, Chuck sees himself sitting in the hospital hallway, a year before and Blair squatting down next to him, helping him get up. He can still feel her soft hold on his arm, and he can still smell the scent of her hair when he pressed her against him.

Chuck nods, and walks away.

When he gets back, both Dan and Blair are sitting next to Serena's bed. Dan rests his arm on the back of Blair's chair, and her fingers curl around his thigh. Chuck gives Serena her gelato, and tells her he has to go back to work. She nods, and thanks him for coming.

He tells Dan and Blair goodbye with a nod.

Getting out of the hospital is like leaving a bubble full of memories. As he gets into his limo, Chuck feels it, the part of him that hopes that he and Blair aren't done, and that she'll come back for him.

But the image of her and Dan flashes before his eyes, and a bigger part of him knows he is kidding himself.

X

Dan calls Vanessa to tell her about Serena, and reassures her right away that it isn't too serious. Vanessa thanks him for calling and goes back to cooking.

She doesn't go to the hospital, because she figures she'll have time to see Serena when she gets out, and also because she knows Nate will probably be there.

They are back to avoiding each other. The time during which they thought they could be friends after the breakup was brief, and tarnished by the moment they shared in that dark anonymous room about two weeks ago.

She expected Nate to go back to Raina, afterwards. She wouldn't have wanted it any other way. Going back with an ex is not something she usually does; she only did it for him, and it didn't work in the end. Ruby would tell her _third time is the charm_, but Vanessa isn't superstitious. She doesn't believe in luck, and she doesn't believe in destiny, when it comes to love. She doesn't believe that two people are meant to be, in such a way that they will always go back to each other.

She only believes that people try. Sometimes they succeed, sometimes they fail. She and Nate tried and failed twice, and it's only the amount of time her heart can withstand.

None of this matters anymore, anyway. She is going to get the scholarship and finish her studies in Barcelona. She is going to learn Spanish, how to dance salsa, how to make paella. She is going to meet guys who don't have shiny hair, and piercing blue eyes and who don't smile at her like she is the most precious thing they've ever seen.

After one busy day at NYU, Vanessa stops by Blair's penthouse. It's still weird and slightly unnatural to do so. She can hardly believe the doorman actually recognizes her, now.

She finds the girls in Serena's room, lying on her bed and reading magazines. They both greet her happily, and Vanessa hands Serena the flowers she picked up on the way.

"I can't stay long" she says

Blair rolls her eyes "Relax, Nate has classes all afternoon, and he is going to see a soccer game with Dan afterwards"

Vanessa considers pretending that her reticence has nothing to do with Nate, but she ends up dropping her bag and sitting on the bed with them.

"What are we reading?"

"We're looking for the clues that Brad Pitt is going to propose to Angelina Jolie" Serena says with a smile "Blair says it'll never happen, and I want to prove her wrong"

Vanessa can't help laughing "That's one productive afternoon"

"All Brooklyn judgment will be left at the entrance, thank you very much" Blair says.

Vanessa leans down to look at the magazine, while Blair asks her what she is doing tonight.

"I have a date with a sociology paper. Why?"

"I want to go out" Blair shrugs "It'll only be Serena and me, then"

"I can't" Serena shakes her head "I too have to study. I can't repeat my freshman year, I'm already one year behind"

Blair looks at the two of them, outraged.

"Are you telling me that the two of you are ditching me for school?"

"Sorry that we can't be there to entertain you right when Dan isn't available" Serena shrugs.

Blair's eyes narrow on her.

"I would have wanted to go out even if Dan was there" she says

"Yes, but you would have gone out with him" Vanessa tells her, and Serena nods "You two would have gone to a bar, and debated whether or not you wanted to go to a nightclub only to end up in his bed watching _Breakfast at Tiffany's_"

Blair seems vexed, but Vanessa laughs because she knows she is right.

"You're being too hard" Serena tells her "Who knows, perhaps they would have actually decided to have sex. You know, to spice up the routine a little"

Blair sits up "Dan and I have plenty of sex, and we _go_ to nightclubs"

"You're an old married couple" Serena tells her, flipping nonchalantly a page of her magazine.

"We are not!"

"You kinda are" Vanessa nods with a little grimace.

"You're just jealous because you two suck at relationships" Blair lifts her chin.

Serena puts a hand on her chest, in a very sarcastic sorrow.

"Oh yes, I am very jealous that I don't have to listen to him talk for hours about some Russian guy"

"Tolstoy isn't _some Russian guy_"

"Whatever, you and Dan are boring to anyone but yourself, just live with it"

"It'll be easier once you accept it, you know" Vanessa says.

She and Serena exchange an amused glare in front of Blair's visible indignation. It's always so easy to set her off, when it comes to Dan.

"Well, I'll have you know that I would take my and Dan's boringness over anything" she says "Because what you call boring is actually caring, romantic, safe and loving. He cooks me apple pies, and he reads me poetry. He teaches me words in Italian, and he corners the pages of the New Yorker he knows I'll be interested in. We walk, we laugh, we talk and he lets me dress him once a week. He is a wonderful partner, and a wonderful lover, and if that's boring, well I'll take it"

Vanessa bites her lip to stop herself from laughing, but Serena fails at it.

"We were just messing with you, Blair" she says "But good to know that Dan is a _wonderful lover_ to someone with basic Chuck Bass standards"

"You have no idea" Blair says, just to be petty.

Then there is a silence, because well, they do have an idea. Vanessa fidgets with the cover of the bed, wondering how long they'll let the awkwardness fill the room until they can find another subject.

"God, we need to meet new people" Blair sighs.

Vanessa and Serena laugh a little.

"We really do. Let's go out tonight" Vanessa says.

Blair shakes her head "Well, that won't be ideal for you. You'll always have a forty percent chance to meet someone Serena has already hooked up with before"

"Oh come on" Serena throws her magazine on Blair who laughs "You know it's bullshit. Now, thirty-five percent, I don't say…"

They all laugh until a knock on the door distracts them. Dan is standing there, taking in the general mood with a smile.

"You girls seem to be having fun" he says "What are we talking about?"

"Oh you know" Blair gets off the bed "Just the fact that we need to meet new people, because you've slept with all of my female friends"

Dan stops smiling instantly; looking so very uncomfortable that Vanessa can't help laughing again. Serena joins her, and she can see Blair trying not to. Dan points at all of them.

"I'm not sure I like this"

"Relax, Casanova" Blair walks up to him "What are you doing here?"

"I felt guilty for ditching you tonight, so I thought I'd stop by before having to head back to Brooklyn"

Blair stands on the tip of her toes to kiss him, and Dan responds, wrapping his arms around her.

"Awww" both Vanessa and Serena say.

Dan breaks the kiss, looking at them over Blair's head.

"Okay, I really do not like this" he says, before looking back at Blair "I'll see you tomorrow, then"

Blair nods "And we'll have plenty of sex"

Dan blinks, shocked, and Serena and Vanessa laugh again. Vanessa doesn't remember the last time she actually saw Dan blush.

"You can go now" Blair waves with a smile.

"I'll come with you"

Vanessa gets off the bed, and picks up her bag. Blair walks them downstairs. When the elevator is there, Vanessa gets inside and watches the ceiling while Dan and Blair kiss goodbye. When she can bring herself to look back down, they are nuzzling and she sees Dan whisper "I love you" to Blair more than she hears him.

She hates them for being so sweet.

Blair answers, then pushes him inside the elevator. Vanessa and Dan separate at the metro station in Brooklyn, and she goes home to get ready. When she arrives back at Blair's, the girls are dressed but it turns out that Serena feels too weak to go out. So they order in, and watch a movie without changing.

Serena falls asleep first, and Blair suggests that Vanessa takes the guest room, since it's already pretty late and that no one should trust Brooklyn streets alone at this hour. She gives her silk pajamas after having changed herself.

Vanessa blinks when she sees Blair is wearing NYU sweatpants that are two sizes too big for her. When she realizes that they probably belong to Dan, she shakes her head with a slight smile. Blair looks down to the pants, and back up to Vanessa.

"Shut up" she says before leaving the room.

X

They go to Dan's after the game. Beers, pizza and weed are quickly settled on the coffee table. Guys night is exactly what Nate needs to take the pressure off. Finals, and Raina and Vanessa, his father, everything feels suffocating. There is also the fact that he and Chuck still live under the same roof without actually living with each other. Nate is surprised he didn't kick him out when he started with Raina, but relieved, in some way.

The pizza is gone, and they are starting on another six-pack when Dan throws his head back on the chair he is sitting on.

"I love her, man"

Nate laughs. High Dan ramblings are just so much more entertaining than the regulars.

"I know" he says, taking a long drag to fully enjoy whatever Dan is going to come up with next.

"No" Dan shakes his head "You guys think you know, but you don't. It's…indescribable."

Nate nods, understanding. He feels the same way, sometimes.

"She is…" Dan starts, tilts his head to the side, looking for the right term "She is the beginning, and the end. She is everything"

His eyes are bulging and red that it looks more creepy than romantic to hear him say that. It throws Nate into a fit of laughter. It catches Dan, who starts laughing with him.

"Don't laugh" he says "I'm serious"

"I know you are, man. It's just…"

Nate doesn't know what it is, so he just keeps laughing. He takes a sip from his beer, hoping it would calm him down.

"I know you love her" he says, a smile still lingering on his face.

He knows Dan loves Blair, because every time they talk about her, every time she is even mentioned, he looks like a little boy on Christmas day. Nate remembers the day Dan told him about them. Nate remembers how Dan said everything was complicated, and that he didn't know how he truly felt about her. Nate remembers thinking that Dan was a moron for not realizing that he was in deep, already.

He is happy it stayed this way. Nate wouldn't admit it out loud, because he is a guy, and everybody sees him as a charmer that just enjoys life, but Dan and Blair give him hope. They give him hope that nothing is written in the universe, and that people do find an unlikely way to each other, when the time is right.

"Someday" Dan points at him "I am going to propose to her. I don't even care if she says no, I just wouldn't be able to live with myself, knowing that I never asked"

"Oh come on" Nate throws his arms in the air "We're way too young to think about that. You're not allowed to ditch me for happy married life until we're at least twenty five"

"I said _someday_" Dan shrugs.

"You're so high that someday could very well be in five minutes. Give me your phone"

Dan laughs, and throws his phone at him. Nate takes it, and puts it in his pocket.

"No proposal tonight. Just us guys"

"It'll happen, you know" Dan says "I'll do it"

Nate sighs "I know you will"

"Don't you ever just get the feeling? Don't you just look at her, and know that you're going to do it someday, no matter what?"

Nate is too preoccupied to wonder who Dan means by _her_, in his case, to answer the question.

"Vanessa doesn't believe in marriage" he whispers "She told me once"

"She might be right. Out of all of us, she's the only whose parents are still together, and they never got married"

They both sink into silence after that. Nate shakes vigorously his head.

"Should we braid our hair, and paint our toenails now?" he asks with a grunt.

Dan laughs again, so Nate laughs too. They down their beers and get others, hoping to hop back into manhood. They stop talking about marriage, and start talking about the game. Nate doesn't know when they fall asleep.

He wakes up to the sound of a ringtone. It's a song, he thinks he recognizes the old fashioned tune Dan and Blair like to listen to for some obscure reason. Nate is not fully aware of even being alive when he pulls out the ringing phone from his pocket.

"Hello"

"Nate?" Blair' voice comes on the other end "Why do you have Dan's phone?"

Nate understands then. He sits up on the couch, glances quickly at Dan still snoring on the chair.

"We were so high last night I was afraid he was going to call you and propose to you" he says with a little laugh, not really realizing.

Okay, perhaps he knows a little what he is saying, and he is just doing it to mess with Blair. She stays silent for a few seconds.

"What?" she asks then, sounding annoyed.

"Nothing" Nate laughs "Dan is asleep; do you want me to wake him up?"

"Yes, I need him to come over and look after Serena this afternoon. She doesn't feel well, and I have a French final and Abrams also has to leave in about forty minutes."

Nate is jarred awake at the mention of Vanessa's name.

"I'll do it" he says "I'll come look after Serena. Don't tell Vanessa, please"

He hears Blair take a sharp breath "Fine. But you better use it to fix the mess you created"

"Yeah" he says, his throat tight "I'll be right there"

"Wait!" Blair is quick to stop him, only to remain silent for a few seconds afterward "What were you talking about, earlier? About Dan… wanting to propose?"

Nate sighs, starting to regret "Forget about it. I told you, we were really high. He was just busy telling me about how much he loves you, and he got carried away, I guess"

"Okay. Fine. Now get here fast, you handsome moron"

"On my way, Brooklyn"

"Stop calling me Brook –"

He hangs up before she has time to yell more. Nate gathers his things, being careful not to wake up Dan and puts down his phone on the coffee table. He hopes Blair isn't going to confront Dan about high proposal talk, because then Dan would definitely, without any doubts kill him. Nate already escaped the consequences of his drunken kiss with Blair, all those months ago, he doesn't think he'll make it pass this blunder.

When he arrives at Blair's penthouse, he goes straight up to Serena's room. She is asleep on her bed, and Vanessa is reading, sitting in a chair. She jumps when she sees Nate, puts the book aside and stands up, taking her purse with her. When she starts making her way out of the room, Nate doesn't stop her because he doesn't want to wake up Serena, so he just follows her out in the hallway.

"Don't follow me" Vanessa says.

Nate takes her by the shoulder, forces her to turn around and presses her against the wall.

"Don't go to Spain" he tells her.

"Stop telling me what to do"

"If you go, I'll follow you, and I will come find you"

"No!" Vanessa pushes him off but he resists, so she starts punching his chest and he takes it in. She stops when she gets that there is no point "This isn't your life to screw up, Nate. It's mine and I can do bad all by myself, thank you very much"

"Vanessa, stop being such a fucking hypocritical feminist and listen to me" Nate leans closer, and looks her in the eyes "You are my everything"

"Bullshit. I'm just the girl you run to whenever your girlfriend dumps you."

"You're wrong" Nate says simply, and he doesn't think he has ever felt this confident in his life "I always come back to you, because you are the only constant thing in my life. I can see it now, and I'm not letting it go"

Vanessa swallows, and this time, when she pushes him away, he lets her. She starts going down the stairs and Nate stays there, watching her.

"Fine, go" he says "But before you leave, just know this: one day, I'll find you, and I'm going to propose to you. And we're going to be happy"

Vanessa looks up, frowning "Are you completely high, or simply mind-numbingly naïve?"

"Neither" Nate says while she pushes the elevator button "I'm in love. With you."

"Why don't you go tell that to Raina?"

"I did tell her. We broke up"

Vanessa is still looking up, and Nate examines her face, trying to look for some clue that what he just said had some sort of impact on her. He doesn't see as such. The elevator arrives, and Vanessa gets in. He hears her mutter "asshole" before it closes on her.

Nate goes back to Serena's room, where she is still sleeping. He sits on her chair Vanessa was in, and notices the book she left behind. He instantly recognizes it. First edition of _The Age of Innocence._ Nate opens the book on the first page, and sees his handwriting, remembers picking up the pen, two years ago.

_To you, and your inner passions. Love, Nate._

Nate sits back with a smile. He doesn't care Vanessa is still mad at him, because Dan was right. Sometimes, you look at her, and you just know.

X

Blair is sitting in her bed, reading, and her heart falls pleasantly in her stomach when she hears the dragged footsteps of Léon in the hallway. Sure enough, he appears through her open door and jumps directly on her bed, starts licking her face. Blair cringes, but laughs anyway.

"Hi, beautiful boy!" she says, petting him "I missed you so much"

She hugs him, barely aware of Dan coming into the room.

"The doctor said he'll be fine" Dan says, leaning down to greet her with a kiss.

He shakes off his shoes and lies with them on the bed. Blair sighs in content. Léon had gotten sick, right before Serena got into the accident, and they had to drop him off at the animal clinic. During the whole week, nothing had felt very right to Blair. Léon had become so quickly a part of her, a part of her and Dan that it left an empty spot in her heart every time they spent time together, without him.

But now he is back, and everything can go back to normal. She lies against Dan, and brings Léon onto her, delighted of his weight on her.

"Can you imagine what it would have been like, if he hadn't recovered?" she whispers.

"He's fine, Blair"

Dan picks up her book and starts reading. From time to time, his eyes leave the pages to fall on Blair, who looks just so pretty in the light of the sunset peeking through the window. Just as if to make the moment perfect, _For me, Formidable_ starts playing, unannounced. They share a laugh and both check their phones to see whose is ringing; it's Blair's. She goes to the bathroom not to disturb Dan and Léon.

"Blair Waldorf speaking"

"Blair, it's Louis"

"Oh! How are you? How is home?"

After they've asked each other questions that they both answer by "Fine, fine", Louis asks her what she is planning on doing for her summer. What Blair was planning on doing was go to the Hamptons, perhaps in Cece's house, drink ice tea and make wild love to Dan on the veranda at sunrise. Louis has another proposition. His sister just fired her personal shopper, and their mother is going crazy about setting up interviews for a new one; summer is a busy time, at the Principality of Monaco. Louis tells Blair the job is hers, if she wants it.

Blair's brain shuts down for about five seconds. She could live in a castle, with a real royal family and get paid to go shopping with a princess. It's only when she is told, that she realizes this is what her life should be. But in her life right now, there are other factors.

"I have to talk to Dan about it" she says

"I figured, but I only managed to get you two days before you have to give an answer

"As soon as I hang up, I'll tell him" Blair hesitates "I also have to ask Serena first, you know"

Louis is silent for a few seconds, then "How is she? I haven't talked to her at all since she left my room, last week. I think we are avoiding each other"

"She's better" Blair glances at Serena's door, wondering if it's even true "She was actually in a little accident, but she is doing fine"

"An accident?"

"She's fine" Blair assures one more time. Louis doesn't talk, but doesn't hang up, so Blair asks "Do you want to talk to her?"

"Yes" Louis says in a trapped breath.

Blair smiles, knocks on Serena's door before opening. Serena is studying, and without a word, Blair gives her the phone before going back to the bathroom, closing the door behind her. But as she hears Serena starting to talk, she can't move away. Dan would call her a voyeur, again, but Serena hasn't talked about Louis once, since he left and Blair just wants to know how her best friend is doing.

She starts speaking in French, and Blair has a bigger trouble understanding, with her terrible accent and the muffling of the door. What she hears though, is Serena sighing "_Je t'aime aussi" _in the phone. It breaks Blair's heart a little.

When she goes back to her own room, Dan and Léon haven't moved one hair. Blair folds on her knees next to him on the bed, and she just stares.

"_Je t'aime aussi_" she whispers.

"Bless you" Dan answer

"Why us?" she asks. Dan makes a little interrogative sound and Blair asks again "Why us? All of our friends are so miserable, in love, why are we the one making it, every time?"

"Don't you know how dangerous it is for women and their little brains to think that much?"

Blair takes the book from his hands and throws it across the room. Dan laughs because, well it's her book. Dan brings her on his chest.

"Why not?" he asks, serious "Don't you think we deserve it? I mean, if you had to fall in love with someone from Brooklyn, don't you think you deserve at least to be happy?"

Blair shrugs, trying not to smile "It's just so odd that _we_ are the one working, you know. I bet all the people around us are persuaded that we'll end, sooner or later"

"You think?" Dan asks, thoughtful "I don't know, everyone seems to be on board, now"

"Because they figure it'll end soon enough, and that everything will go back to the way it used to be"

"Or perhaps they just see us happy, and it makes them happy" Dan lifts her chin "You should give our friends more credit"

He might be right. Blair thinks back about the conversation she had with Serena and Vanessa, when they accused them of being an old married couple. She tells Dan about Louis's proposition, and he doesn't even hesitate before telling her to go.

"But don't you want us to spend our first summer together?" she asks, still pleased that he is not disappointed.

"We'll spend the next one together. We'll travel and go to…Rome or something" he kisses the tip of her nose "And then the one after that, we'll go to China, perhaps"

"And what about the one after that?" Blair looks up, smiling.

"We'll decide in China"

Dan leans down to kiss her, pressing her even closer to him. Léon is still next to them, and makes it difficult for them to move. They kiss for a while, brushing each other's hair and sighing in each other's mouths. When they separate, both a little short of breath, Blair stares at him, and Dan stares back. He smiles.

"What is it?" he asks.

Blair goes back to rest her head on his chest.

"We are young, you know" she says

"I don't know, my hip has been giving me trouble lately"

Blair doesn't laugh, and he can't blame her.

"I feel lucky" she shrugs absent-mindedly "Most people have to wait so long to find what we have. Love has always been complicated for me, and I'm glad it's not anymore. But it scares me"

"Okay, Blair" Dan pushes her away to look at her "What's going on in your head?"

He sees her look down, reaching out to pet Léon. She shrugs again.

"Nate told me what you said the other night, when you guys went to your place after the game"

She is clearly expecting some kind of reaction from him, but all Dan can do at the moment is shrug.

"What did I say?"

Blair frowns "You don't remember?"

Dan shakes his head with a smile.

"Did I insult Degas?"

Blair is still for an instant, then she laughs a little.

"No. You just said you love me"

"Oh. So we're good?"

Blair nods, and leans back on him. His hand goes to stroke her hair.

"I do, you know. I love you" he says.

Her hands clench in a fist on his shirt.

"I love you too"

A light, peaceful silence settles. Dan sees her close her eyes, as if getting ready to fall asleep even though the sun out the window has barely been gone, and the stars aren't even up yet. He leaves the bed to put music on, searches in his mind for the melody that would suit best the moment. Blair shivers on the bed when she hears the first notes of _Moon River. _Dan comes back to join her, settling in their previous position. He leans down to press a kiss on the top of her head.

"We have all life, Blair" he says "Don't be scared, I'll take my time. But I'll do it, one day"

Blair doesn't open her eyes, but he sees her smile.

"You are such a liar" she whispers "I knew you would remember"

* * *

_So yes, Dan and Blair from everyone's perspective and how it affects their own lives. I just would have loved it if the show had the other characters say what they really thought about it, other than "what? it's crazy"_

_This fic has been moving incredibly fast, I can't quite believe it. See you next for the last chapter._

_Love, xo_


	8. Chapter 8

_Hi lovelies!_

_Here is the last chapter of For me, Formidable. The story will continue in a final fanfic, but I had to end this one there because I want to write the rest of the story a bit differently. I will tell you all about it in the next and final installment, called **Les Plaisirs Démodés**._

_Thanks for all those who followed, read and reviewed. I love writing about Dair, and you guys make it even more fun._

_Hope you enjoy this one._

* * *

If Dan wasn't so drunk, or high or whatever –he doesn't even remember what Nate gave him –he would find fascinating how everything can be so bright and dark all the same in the hot, crowded, loud confines of a nightclub. By now, how they ended there is a complete mystery. What he can clearly recall is the last day of finals and a boring gala that Lily and Anne Archibald insisted on making them all attend.

But somehow, Dan is there, in a suit, crowded by a thousand people, shouting out the lyrics of a song he didn't even know two minutes earlier with Serena who is moving her hips way too easily for someone who was in a car accident two weeks ago. Nate is with them, moving without lifting his feet from the floor –usual sign that it's time for him to go home.

Fluorescent lights keep hitting his eyes, and Dan starts feeling a bit hot and flushed. He looks around for a possible exit. He catches briefly the sight of Chuck and Charlie making out in a corner, for some reason, it makes him laugh.

His eyes get also caught by Vanessa's skirt patterns, and then his breath gets trapped. Blair is next to her, red dress, red heels, red lips and her long brown hair falling in her back. The dress is too short, Dan thinks, and people –men –are staring, waiting for an opening to approach her. He watches from afar Blair starting to move to the sound, fingers grazing softly up and down her sides. Her knees bend lightly, then she is back up, moving her hips around, throwing her head back. Her head turns, gaze going hazily over the crowd until it meets his. Then he sees the smallest of smirk on her lips, and a glimpse of malice in her eyes.

Dan curses under his breath.

He knows that whatever is feeling is emphasized by the euphoria of finally being in summer, and the reticence of her leaving for Monaco in two weeks, but Dan simply cannot help it. She is, at that moment, the most beautiful thing he's ever had the dreadful chance to see in his life.

He crosses the crowd, assured and confident until he reaches her. His arms slide easily around her waist, his lips find hers with a natural motion and he backs her up against the wall. They have gotten pretty good at shameless public make out, especially when they're drunk. The music is still loud, pounding in their heads, but somehow Dan still hears Blair whisper.

"Bathroom"

He moves away from her, fingers sliding down her arms to take her hands and pull her with him. Once they're inside the bathroom -men's, women's, who cares –Dan turns around to lock the door. They are deep inside Gossip Girl territory, the last thing he needs is a sex tape of him and Blair on the internet.

When he turns back to Blair, she is leaning forward above the sinks, canting out her hips and shimmying out of her panties which are red too and which Dan finds marvelous. His eyes follow as they fall down her thighs and pool around her ankles. She steps out of them.

"Pick them up" he hears her say "They are worth more than the suit you're wearing"

Dan steps forward and crouches down behind her, one hand around her thigh to pick up the lace fabric. He doesn't know what to do with them, so he ends up stuffing them in his pocket. He sees in the mirror Blair smile at that.

Dan figures that people are going to want using the bathroom soon, so he locks an arm around Blair from behind, and undoes his pants with the other hand. Blair holds on with both hands onto his arm, moaning the second he slides inside of her. While he moves, Dan watches her reflection in the mirror. She is looking back, eyes focused on his face and her cheeks are getting a pink shade that goes with her lipstick.

"Don't look at me like that" Dan whispers, because he can't handle the intensity in her eyes; he never could.

"Okay" Blair smirks as she closes her eyes.

She starts getting louder and one of her hands leave his arm to rest against the mirror, all five fingers spread apart. Dan sees the crease between her brows, the one's meaning he knows so well, and he picks up the pace. Blair comes loudly, short breaths between high pitched gasps and just as Dan follows her, someone knocks on the bathroom door.

As soon as they unlock the door, they get thrown out by security. They are barely outside, being stared at by everyone when the inside security guy comes back, throwing a wasted Nate at them. Charlie, Chuck, Serena and Vanessa drunkenly follow. Dan helps Chuck get Nate to his limo. The girls walk ahead of them, arms locked and giggling. Blair turns around twice to give Dan a smile that makes his heart skip a beat.

It's the last thing he remembers.

When Dan wakes up, it's because Aznavour's voice is ringing out in his room. He fumbles sleepily, feeling Blair stir next to him, until he finds his phone.

"Hello, Daniel. It is your father. A car is waiting for you downstairs and you have exactly twenty minutes to make it to Grand Station, unless you want to hear for the rest of your life your sister ranting about how you missed her high school graduation because of your girlfriend, even if you're not with Blair right now"

Dan's body shoots up. Fuck.

He hangs up without saying anything, and takes out a travelling bag, starts throwing clothes into it. Blair moves around in his bed; one of her arms reaches on the floor to take a shoe and throw at him. She misses, it breaks his desk lamp.

"Let me sleep" she mutters

"Sorry, I forgot I was taking the train this morning"

Dan considers changing, then figures he is already wearing a suit, so why bother? He takes a pair of sunglasses and puts them on, not wanting to show his father his hungover face. He sits next to Blair on the bed.

"Hey, I'm going. See you tomorrow"

Blair grunts, and rolls to face him. It seems to take her a lot of effort for her to open her eyes.

"I love you" she says "For not forcing me to come"

Dan chuckles "I love you too. Don't forget to feed Léon"

He kisses her, takes his bag, and gets out. Dan sees Vanessa, Charlie and Serena asleep in Vanessa's old bed; when he turns back he sees Chuck asleep on his couch and Nate passed out on the floor, unaware of Léon licking his face.

It's the way Dan leaves his loft that morning, and nothing has ever more felt like the start of summer to him.

Rufus and Eric give him a look when he arrives at Grand Station, and Dan gives back a single shrug. He doesn't have the time to change either when they get to Hudson, because Jenny's graduation starts half an hour later. Jenny turns up her nose at his crumpled suit, and Alison gives him the same look as Rufus and Eric did.

As they sit, waiting for Jenny to be called, Dan's head starts getting heavy. Jenny herself, sitting amongst her classmates doesn't even seem to be that interested in the matter. Eric is already flirting with someone, Nana is criticizing every single student who is handed a diploma, and Dan would rather be in his bed, or walking in Central Park with Blair.

But then, when Jennifer Humphrey gets called, he sees the look on his parents' faces, and he hears Eric cheer, doesn't hear Nana criticize anything and it gets to him that this is the moment when his baby sister is becoming just his sister. It sucks.

When Jenny joins them, she is smiling, holding proudly her diploma. Dan is the last one to give her a congratulations hug. The intention is aborted when, as he takes his hands out of his pockets to pull her into his arms, Blair's red underwear fall on the ground. Eric laughs, Rufus turns his head around, Alison blushes, Nana cringes and Jenny asks a higher power to kill her on the spot.

X

The heat is perfect. Not too heavy, not too dry, just the right amount to allow Blair to spend several hours on the roof of a Brooklyn building in her bikini, eating a frozen yogurt and reading the last issue of Vogue.

She sinks into her sun chair more comfortably, starting on a very promising article. Of course, Dan chooses this moment to notify his existence.

"Bair, a little help here?" he asks, sounding annoyed.

Blair lifts up her sunglasses, and looks over at him in his bathing short trying to maintain Léon into the soapy water of the giant bathing basin.

"I'm busy" Blair says "You seem to be doing fine on your own"

"Do I really? I have dog shampoo in my hair"

"Good. I actually bought it for you to use too. I figured since regular shampoo doesn't seem to work…"

She goes back to her article, while Dan gets a nervous, annoyed laugh.

"And here I was, thinking I would actually miss you once you're gone to Monaco" he says, stroking foam out of Léon's hair.

"And here you are, pretending that you won't"

He grunts, and she smiles. They hear someone call from the inside of the loft, and Dan gets up.

"Make sure he doesn't move, at least?"

Blair hums, and nods, so Dan makes his way to the window. He's reached it when he hears a giant splash. Taking a deep breath, he turns around to see Léon running happily around Blair, and the basin knocked over, leaking on the roof.

"Oops" Blair says, flipping nonchalantly a page of her magazine.

Dan shakes his head and makes his way inside the loft. Vanessa is standing in the kitchen, drinking from a bottle of water. She laughs when she sees him.

"Bathing the dog?"

"Attempting to" Dan hugs her hello, finds her a little stiff "How is the packing for Barcelona going?"

"Great" Vanessa nods, and drinks again from the bottle "Actually, I wanted to come and talk to you about something, since I leave for Vermont in three days and won't be coming back to the city before going to Spain"

"Uh oh" Dan smiles "Is this the part when we cry?"

Vanessa doesn't smile back, so Dan stops. She clears her throat.

"I read _Inside_. I think it's great, and that you should publish it"

"What?"

Dan asks that, because he really can't ask anything else. He is not even sure that what Vanessa said is what he actually heard. He wasn't prepared, so it must not be real. He swallows, hard, as he starts to take in the extent of the situation. Fuck.

"How did you even find it?" he asks, his throat tight.

Dan needs to know, because he printed it a little less than two weeks ago. And he doesn't have the memory of Vanessa being in his loft ever since, or at least not alone.

"I came by to borrow your DVD of _Strangers on a Train_, you weren't there and the window was open so…listen, the point is…it's amazing work, Dan. It doesn't deserve to stay hidden in your desk drawer like a stupid teenage diary"

"You crossed a line, Vanessa"

The sentiment of exposure and betrayal crawls onto his skin, and creeps up in his stomach. Dan barely restrains to put his arms around him in protection.

"I know" she puts her hands up to appease him "But that's what I do. I cross the line to tell you when your work is shit, and I cross the line to tell you when it's good and that…that was mind-blowing, Dan"

The compliments, for some reason, don't land in his mind. It is still too sudden for him to really process anything.

"I can't publish it" he says "I'm not ready, and it's not ready, and I can't do that to everyone"

"It doesn't have anything to do with anyone" Vanessa sighs

"Have you not read it?" Dan asks with a bitter laugh "Those are my friends, Vanessa"

"They're my friends too. And they'll understand, they won't stand in the way of your success" Vanessa steps closer to look him in the eyes "This is it, Dan. This is your moment"

Dan has a bit of trouble breathing. He thinks Vanessa might be right, but if she were, would his heart pound so loudly in his chest, as if to warn him?

"You need to go" he finally says, wanting to end with the pressure.

Vanessa frowns "You can't let them stop you from getting this, Dan. When are you going to realize that you won't get anywhere unless you take some risks?"

"Says the girl who is moving to Europe to run away from her problems" Dan snaps back "But you won't see me stop you, because my life was actually much better until you climbed back up that fire escape, four years ago"

It takes him a few seconds to actually regret saying that. But it's already too late anyway. Vanessa's face closes, and she stands there looking at him. Dan doesn't say anything because he is certain that she can see on his face how sorry he is. It doesn't really make anything better.

"Fine" she finally says "You won't see me climb it up again. In fact, you won't even see me step into this loft again"

"Don't say that" Dan sighs, feeling suddenly tired.

Vanessa shakes her head, and makes her way to the front door.

"I can't be the person you treat like crap because you know they'll always be around. Not anymore. So have a nice life with Blair, and Serena, and Nate and even Chuck. You finally got what you always wanted, but were too full of shit to admit"

Dan stands there even after the door closes on her. He hears her praises about his story in his mind, and he just wants it to stop.

"What was that about?" Blair's voice asks behind him "Was it Vanessa?"

Dan clears his throat, and turns around. Blair is walking toward him, soaked Léon trotting behind her.

"Yeah. She came by to give me back a DVD"

"Was that why you two were shouting?" Blair asks

"I told her _Strangers on a Train_ was the lowest point of Hitchcock" Dan shrugs

Blair laughs "So, you wanted to kill her"

She goes back to his room to put clothes on. Dan takes several breaths, registering that he just lied to her, way more easily than he would have thought possible, and she believed him. Because she trusts him. Because she believed him when he said after the story with Georgina and Milo that he would never hide anything from her, ever again.

Dan regrets what happened with Vanessa, but he doesn't regret the reason why it happened. There was a time when perhaps he would have listened to her. But now everything's changed. Now Blair looks at him, she smiles at him, she kisses him and she loves him. And this is the one thing he'll never gamble.

X

Blair knows Dan is avoiding her and she knows it has everything to do with the Constance-St Jude alumni reunion invitations they both received in the mail. He doesn't answer his phone for three days and spends most of his time at The Empire with Nate.

What he seems to forget, is that he gave Blair a key to the loft. So she makes her way in one afternoon, and waits until he gets home with Léon, late at night. She secretly likes the way his body freezes in horror when he sees her sitting in his chair, waiting for him.

"Shit. The key" he says, unleashing Léon.

"Yes. The key" Blair closes her book, and stands up "So, have you decided what suit you're going to wear?"

Dan whines, and lets himself fall on the couch.

"Do we absolutely have to go? Is it really necessary for us to walk over there and hear everyone whisper about how unnatural it is that we're together?"

"What we're going to do, actually, is shamelessly show off our happiness" Blair sits on his lap "Besides, it's me we're talking about, everything I do is considered avant-garde. I'll bet you anything that Hazel and Katie stop drooling over Nate and find themselves a proper hipster within the week"

"So you just want to show your latest trendy accessory: me" Dan raises an eyebrow.

Blair thinks about it.

"If you say '_yes_', you're in trouble" Dan warns her.

Blair laughs and kisses him, long, slow and hot. Then she pulls away, biting her lips and fluttering her eyelids.

"Please?" she asks softly, before pressing a light kiss behind his ear "For me?"

Dan shakes firmly his head. Of course, two days later, he is standing in the halls of St Jude School for boys, wearing a suit that Blair chose for him. He briefly wonders in which one of her designer handbags she keeps his balls. Nate bets him it's the orange Versace.

Everybody keeps looking at them with narrowed eyes, but Blair is unshaken. She smiles, and greets her old teacher so pleasantly, it's disconcerting. Dan decides to do the same, because he doesn't want to be the stuck-up boyfriend next to the sparkling girl. So he takes Blair with him to the dance floor, and makes her twirl as steadily as he can. Blair laughs, until something catches her eyes, and she gasps bringing Dan against her.

"What the hell?" she asks "Look at what Charlie is wearing!"

Dan turns around with a sigh, then back to Blair.

"Yes, it's hideous" he says, trying to keep dancing. Then he sees the way Blair looks at him, and he tries "I mean it's beautiful. But it would look better on you?"

Blair hits him on the shoulder "It's Serena's dress to Cotillion! You should know, you were her date"

"It was four years ago" Dan defends, makes her twirl one more time.

Blair lets him do, but keeps an evil glare upon Charlie from afar.

"That bitch is a psycho"

He kisses her cheek to distract her from the matter, and he overhears Katie Farkas say something about being about to throw up. Then Blair's evil glare is transferred directly from Charlie to her. After the dance, they join Nate at the bar. They drink champagne and try not to make fun of Georgina's husband who looks so very uncomfortable.

Blair's phone rings. She excuses herself to take the call, and when she comes back, she gives them a stiff smile.

"Have any of you seen Chuck?" she asks "I just ran into Queller, she was looking for him"

Dan and Nate both shake their heads, clueless. Blair finishes her glass of champagne, distracted, then she goes and says she'll be right back.

"Is she okay?" Nate asks Dan.

Dan shrugs, wondering the same. A few minutes later, Chuck joins them and asks for a glass of scotch, neat, that he downs in two seconds. Nate and Dan exchange a worried glare.

"What's going on man?" Nate asks "Is it because Queller is looking for you? You know you don't have to fear her anymore, right? High school is over"

Chuck asks for another glass, drinks it the same way he did with the first. Then he sighs.

"I've got to get my shit together" he says.

Dan debates internally whether or not he wants to listen to Chuck's man pain tales. He decides to stay, because it's not like he has anything better to do, until Blair comes back. Nate asks Chuck what's going on, and not very surprisingly, he stays quiet. Nate insists, until Chuck gives in.

"Something…strange just happened. With Charlie"

Dan sees Nate trying to repress a smirk, and he knows the same thing is going on over his own face.

"We were in Queller's office, and she suggested to give life to an old fantasy, one that would take place on a desk" Chuck says, looking down to his empty glass. "Everything was going rather well, but then she said something"

"What did she say?" Nate is really smiling this time.

Chuck hesitates, glances at the both of them.

"She asked me to call her Serena."

Nate and Dan's smirks fall off from their faces. Dan shakes ever so slightly his head, wondering if he heard right. Before he and Nate can request a confirmation, Chuck nods.

"And then, what happened?" Nate asks.

Chuck frowns slightly "I called her Serena"

"Dude!" Nate exclaims.

"I'm gonna throw up" Dan puts a fist over his mouth.

"Relax, I stopped two seconds later, it was too weird"

"You think! She's like your sister, man!" Nate shakes his head.

"Well, it seemed to be working for some" Chuck glances at Dan, who narrows his eyes on him.

He orders another drink with Nate, while Chuck reads a text he just received. He looks at them.

"Where is Blair?" he asks.

"I think she went to the bathroom or see Serena" Dan answers, not particularly liking that both Chuck and Blair asked each other's whereabouts within the last fifteen minutes.

"Hey guys" Serena arrives next to them "I think there might be something wrong with Charlie"

"You have no idea" Nate tells her.

Serena starts telling them about Charlie's medicines that she apparently stopped taking and how it could be dangerous for her to be alone. The plan is to separate and find her, before she does something.

Dan cracks his neck, and sighs before finishing his glass. Drama doesn't go on summer vacation, in the Upper East Side.

X

Blair is still shaking when Chuck unties her. He takes her softly by the arms to stand her up, but she dismisses him. She tries to get up, on her own, with the firm intention of walking away and never turning back, but her knees fail her. So when Chuck reaches to her again, she lets him and he helps her stand.

They both talk to the police, it's quick. Because he is Chuck Bass, he manages to convince them to book an appointment with Blair the following morning for her deposition, to let her go home and rest. Then he holds up a hand, hailing a cab, but Blair stops him.

"I want to walk" she whispers.

She starts walking, getting rid of her trench coat because the heat is suddenly excruciating, suffocating. Blair walks, counts in her head, steadies her breathing. She can hear Chuck's footsteps following her. A part of her wants to tell him to stop; the other one wins, and allows him to walk behind her.

She stops when she sees something that looks like a party. There is music, and bright lights, people smoking cigars outside. Blair realizes then that perhaps she needs a drink, so she walks toward the party, gets greeted by the security as if she belongs there, faintly hearing Chuck calling her outside. Turns out the party is a Bar Mitzvah, so Blair gathers all the Judaic knowledge she got from Cyrus and melts into the crowd while making her way to the bar.

"A bottle of champagne, please"

The bartender blinks at her, then gives her a bottle after having opened it.

Chuck finds her "Blair, I think you're in a trauma, let's go"

Blair shrugs, drinks from the bottle.

"I want to dance" she says.

And so she does. Blair dances with the anonymous at the party, and she dances alone, turning around on her spot and she never stops drinking. Chuck stands on the side, looks at her warily, like he is witnessing her having some kind of a mental breakdown. And perhaps she is, a little.

Blair has emptied three quarters of the bottle on an empty stomach, and suddenly, she doesn't feel so good. A woman notices her, and holds her when her knees go weak again. Chuck arrives and the woman shows them to a room where he can lie Blair down.

Blair doesn't want to lie down, though. Because then the world will start to turn.

"If I lie down, I will have no restrains nor regrets on vomiting on you"

Chuck lets her go, and Blair goes to sit on the floor, back against the wall and legs brought up against her body. Chuck sits on a couch nearby. Blair rests her head against the wall, fighting the unexplainable tears, and the pent up anger.

"I went over there to help you" she says.

Chuck doesn't answer.

"I received a call from Russell Thorpe that you were in danger, and then I debated in my head whether I should go or not" Blair knows at that instant that she is crying. It makes her even angrier "But then I asked myself, what Dan would do, so I came to your rescue"

"I'm sorry, Blair. I really am"

Blair shrugs, because it doesn't matter that he is sorry. What matters is that she was scared and alone because she wanted to help him. Every time she tries to help him, she ends up getting hurt. She sees Chuck put a hand over his face.

"He used you because he knows how much I care about you. I'm sorry I make it too obvious how much I still love you" he says.

"Of course you still love me!" Blair shouts "We've known each other our whole lives and we even dated, of course you would still love me. It doesn't mean that you're in love with me. There is not one only way to love people, Chuck, when are you going to realize? You selfish motherfucker"

She doesn't even know what she is saying, really, but it makes Chuck laugh.

"How do you love me?" he asks.

Blair grunts, thinking he has a lot of nerve to ask such a question. Then again, he is Chuck Bass.

"Like that porcelain doll I've had on my shelf since I was little. It used to be my favorite, then I turned nine and barely looked at her. But I never give it up to charity or throw it away, because my room wouldn't look the same without it"

"I'm going to try and take that as a compliment"

"As you wish"

"How do you love Dan?"

"No comparison necessary. I just love him"

Blair wipes away the humidity on her cheek. She is starting to feel better, and now she wants to see Dan. She closes her eyes, trying to picture his face, using her memory to hear is voice.

"He wrote a book about me" she says, eyes still closed.

"Of course he did" Chuck sighs, voice pierced by a slight annoyance.

"I knew he loved me, but I didn't know how much until I read some parts. He says I'm a Queen. He says I am _'inevitably and dreadfully lovable, like a time bomb that had been hidden under Dylan's skin from the moment he met her. He always knew, somehow, that it was there. The ticking was faint, but still audible. He always assumed that the day it would go off would be the day of her cold-blooded murder by him. Then she scolded him about mistaking her coffee order, something that she did every single time, just as a way to greet him and _boom_; he was in love. He had been for a while. The ticking was the process, and the explosion left only her in his sight to look at"_

Sometime, Blair recites it in her head at night the same way she just recited it to Chuck. She opens her eyes to see him nod slowly.

"It is amazingly accurate" he says.

Blair cannot be the judge of that, so she doesn't say anything. They stay in silence for a while.

"Do you want to hear what happened between me and Charlie, earlier tonight?" Chuck asks.

"Do I?" Blair eyes him, skeptical.

Chuck nods with a faint smile, and tells her the story. And Blair laughs so hard that the euphoria mixed with the descent of adrenaline in her blood and the rise of alcohol makes her pass out. She hears Chuck call her name, feels him lift her from the floor.

Blair feels she is being put in the back of a car, and then taken out. When she feels familiar arms around her, with the familiar cheap cologne that comes with, she sighs in content. Then she is being stripped down in her underwear, laid out on cotton sheets. Her toes meet Léon's hair somewhere on the bed. She hears the humming of a fan, feels the artificial wind blow on her skin; then Dan's arm around her waist and his lips whispering "_I love you_" on the skin of her shoulder.

X

Blair lies back onto Dan, putting their sweaty, hot flesh together. The air conditioning onto her moist skin makes her shudder, and Dan wraps his arms around her. They both try to catch their breath, until Blair rolls off him and sits on the bed, reaching out for her robe. Dan's hands coming to rest on her stomach prevents her from tying it. She bats them away when she feels them inch up toward her breasts.

"Enough" she says "I have to pack"

Dan pulls her back on him.

"Don't go" he whispers in the crook of her neck.

"Come with me" Blair answers, only half-joking.

"So I can pass up the chance to get sand out of Léon's hair, be Eric's wingman and coach mini Nate Archibald into making an acceptable home run?"

Blair laughs, and gets swiftly off him before he can maintain her there. Dan grunts and starts dressing himself back up. Blair goes to stand in front of her closet, takes out several items that she puts carefully into an open suitcase on the floor. Léon lies next to her feet on the carpet.

Serena comes into the room through the bathroom door. She has a hand on her eyes.

"Everybody decent?"

Blair laughs "Yes"

Serena looks at her in her robe, and Dan in only his shorts, and she raises a dubious eyebrow.

"Barely" she mutters, then to Dan "I need to talk to you. What are you going to do during which the two weeks Eric is with Jenny in London before joining you to the Hamptons? Nate and Chuck are already spinning their little globe, deciding where they're leaving tomorrow"

"I don't know" Dan shrugs "Write, probably"

Serena half rolls her eyes "Of course. Well I have a suggestion. I decided that it was time I really discovered myself"

"You decide that every year" Blair says, putting a dress in her suitcase.

"_Well_, I'm deciding it again this year" Serena says pointedly "Because I screwed up four relationship this year. I broke my record of three"

"Come on, you didn't screw anything up with Louis" Dan attempts to reassure her "You know it"

"It doesn't matter" Serena says "The thing is, I thought that perhaps I feel like I'm missing something about myself because there is a part of my life I never got the chance to know. That's why I called Scott."

Dan blinks. Blair turns away from her closet and toward Serena.

"Scott…Rosson?" Dan asks.

"Our brother, yes" Serena says, impatient "He's just moved in with his girlfriend, and he said they would be thrilled to have us over for a couple of weeks at the beginning of the summer. They have a guest room, and a pull out couch in his office. They even said Léon could come"

Dan sees Blair looking at Serena like she has just lost her mind, and he can't really blame her. Although, the idea isn't as weird to him as it should feel.

"Do Rufus and Lily know about this?" he asks.

Serena shakes her head "And I'm not planning on telling them. We'll say we're in the Hamptons, and take a commercial flight to Boston not to raise suspicions. I think it would be good for us three to get to know each other better"

Dan glances over at Blair, then back at Serena who seems to be nervously waiting for his answer. Dan sighs.

"Okay" he says

Serena instantly smiles "Thank you. I wouldn't have been able to go alone. We can leave the same day as Blair, it'll be great, you'll see"

She hugs him quickly before going back to her room through the bathroom. Blair walks toward Dan, runs absent-mindedly her fingers in his curls.

"Are you sure about that?" she asks.

Dan shrugs awkwardly "Sure. It might take my mind off you leaving me here to die alone"

Blair laughs "You are so needy"

Dan takes her by the waist, and pushes her onto the bed. Blair protest briefly as his mouth starts to kiss her exposed collarbone, and his hands untie her robe.

"Only when it comes to you"

X

The morning on the day they are both supposed to leave New York, Dan is at the penthouse with Léon, and following Blair everywhere she goes. It makes Blair laugh, to see his pouting lips and his dreadful face. She hopes to cheer him up by watching one of his favorite James Stewart movies, but as soon as they're done, Dan is back to sulking like he's just learned the real date of the impending apocalypse.

She tries to distract him by ordering brunch, but he only eats three waffles, instead of the customary five. At one point, Blair pops open several buttons on the front of her dress. Then Dan is distracted for a good while, pleasantly so, but when they start dressing back up, she sees his shoulder fall again.

So she hits him.

"Stop acting like you're going to miss me more than I'm going to miss you!"

Dan sits on the bed, back turned to her and shrugs. Blair sighs, annoyed and kneels behind him.

"You are infuriating, you know" she whispers as she wraps her arms around him.

Dan kisses both of her wrists, then bends his head down, nose against her skin, breathing her in. Blair tightens her hold, and closes her eyes. She knows that her leaving is not the only thing that's wearing him down. She knows Vanessa left without telling him goodbye after their fight, but she is not supposed to know they fought, even less what they fought about.

Blair feels a bit guilty for showing the manuscript to Vanessa. She didn't mean for them to fight. She didn't mean for anything to go down the way it did. But Blair has faith in their friendship, she knows –or she hopes really hard –that everything will get better, in the end. If it doesn't, she'll come forward and patch things up. She just doesn't want Dan to feel pressured.

"August 4th?" he asks, bringing her out of her reverie.

Blair smiles "August 4th"

Dan adds up everything in his head.

"That's fifty-nine days, from today" he says.

"I know. I already counted"

Dan turns around and pushes her against the mattress, presses his body onto hers. He kisses her for a long time, and Blair kisses back, becoming aware that this is the last time in fifty-nine days she'll be able to have him this way in her arms.

"Call me every day" Dan says on her lips

"I probably won't" Blair answers. She rolls them around so she is on top of him, and weaves their fingers together "I will be too busy living in a castle. You'll have to call me"

"I will be too busy rejecting Hamptons cougars" he sits up to bring her closer to him.

Blair smiles and gives him a light kiss.

"Then I guess no one is calling"

"I guess so"

She kisses him again, mouth open, determined to take his breath away. Dan responds, threads his fingers in her hair and curls his hand around her thigh. The kiss softens, until they pull apart, breathless. Blair rests her forehead against his.

"Dan. If you don't call me, it's not going to end very well for you"

He smirks and presses his lips on her neck.

"I could say the same for you"

Blair bites the inside of her cheek.

"Fine. Then we shall see who breaks first" she says, looking at him defiantly.

Dan sighs "We both know it'll be me"

Blair laughs, kisses him again. Someone knocks on the door. It's Dorota, telling her that the car supposed to take her to the Grimaldi plane has arrived.

Blair gets half-heartedly off Dan, and puts her Vivier heels on. The doorman comes to take her luggage, and Dan leashes the Léon. Serena is waiting for them in the foyer; she and Blair hug for about five minutes. Then Blair takes Dan's hand in hers, and never lets go, not in the elevator, not in the car.

It's only when they're standing next to the plane that their fingers separate, and Blair feels an uncomfortable tingling.

"Don't use that time to make Léon love you more than he loves me" Blair warns, eyes narrowed and smile trapped into her pursed lips.

"I promise" Dan says. He pulls her in his arms, and even Léon gets closer to them. Dan kisses her one more time "You know, I do feel like I'm going to miss you more than you're going to miss me"

"That's because I made sure to take something with me that would always remind me of you" Blair says, and she kisses him again "I hope it won't be too hard for you to live without it"

Dan is only suspicious for a few seconds before he laughs, understanding.

"I'm sure Cedric will love Monaco"

Blair nods with a smile, and Dan can't help it, he kisses her again.

"Should I steal something from you, then? So I won't miss you too much. Should I take one of your Hermès scarves that you left behind?"

"I never leave any Hermès scarves behind"

A plane attendant approaches shyly to tell her it's time to go.

"August 4th" Dan says.

"August 4th" Blair repeats with a nod.

Then she bites her lip, thoughtful. Dan watches her lean down to take off one shoe that she hands him.

"To remind you of me" she says.

Dan laughs and takes it. Since she has one bare foot hanging in the hair, and probably cringes internally at the idea of putting it on the ground, Dan lifts her in his arms and walks with her to the plane scale. Then he puts her down.

They kiss one last time, before she disappears into the plane. Blair sits and watches through the window Dan and Léon get into the waiting car, which eventually drives away just as the plane gets ready to take off.

X

When Dan walks into the loft, the first thing he sees is an old record on the kitchen bar. He lets go of Léon's leash and puts Blair's shoe down to properly look at it. He is not really surprised to see that it's an Aznavour song. It's called _Les Plaisirs Démodés, _and a note is sticking on it.

_It's only fifty-nine days until we get to rediscover the old fashion pleasures, together_. _Love, B._

Dan smiles. He puts the record on, letting the sound fill completely the loft while he packs. Then Serena calls him, says she is waiting downstairs and Dan leaves his loft, for a whole summer.

Serena watches a romantic comedy on the plane, and Dan writes. When they land in Boston, his hands start getting sweaty. He laughs a little at his obvious nervousness. They get Léon out of his travel crate, and leave the luggage delivery room.

Scott spots them first, and walks toward them with a little smile, holding the hand of a girl with long blond hair. Dan doesn't know if he should hug, or shake hands. Then he figures that Scott is after all a Humphrey, so he opens his arms. Scott and Karen give them a little tour of Boston before taking them home. Dan can see how excited Serena is, and he can't help feeling the same, a little.

They all cook dinner together, eat in a light chipper mood. It's easy, and it's fun. They never mention their parents, though. After dinner, Serena and Karen settle on the couch with a glass of wine to watch a _Sex and The City _marathon, so Dan and Scott go on the balcony with a beer to talk about life, and what they've been missing on. Dan doesn't tell him about Lily getting arrested, spends most of his breath on stories about Jenny and Eric.

He tells Scott about Blair, too. Scott laughs most of the time, opens his eyes in awe when Dan tells him about something Blair did, or said. Then Scott tells him about how he met Karen; she was a regular costumer in the music shop he is working at. She came in one day asking if they had anymore Lincoln Hawk records.

They talk until Dan feels tired. Karen and Serena are still laughing in front of the TV. Dan bids them goodnight, and goes to Scott's office with Léon. The pull out couch is already open, so he just has to put himself into his pajamas and lay under the cover, spent.

It's around three in the morning when his phone buzzes on the desk. Dan knows only one person would have the indecency to call at such an hour.

He picks up "Well, well. Look who broke first"

Blair's chuckle rings out deliciously in his ear.

"I've just arrived. I had breakfast with Louis, and now I'm in my room. And I miss you"

Léon whimpers in his sleep.

"I miss you too. Thank God, I have your shoe. So? How is the castle?"

Blair sighs dreamily "You see how my room in New York is the size of your living room? Well, my room in Monaco is the size of my living room in New York"

"Don't get used to it. Don't forget that you lowered your standards to the point of being perfectly satisfied with Brooklyn"

"I'll try. What time is it over there?"

"Three in the morning"

"I should let you sleep"

"You don't have to"

"I want you to sleep, so you can have a great day with your extended family tomorrow"

Dan smiles; he really does miss her.

"Alright. Talk to you soon?"

"Yes" Blair takes a deep breath, not really wanting to end the call "August 4th, though?"

"August 4th" Dan repeats with a smile "I love you, Blair Waldorf"

"I love you too, Dan Humphrey"

They hang up. Dan doesn't go back to sleep right away. He gets up, and fiddles in his bag until he finds Blair's shoe, that he puts next to the window, and his agenda. With a marker, he circles the date of August 4th, and crosses June 6th. Then he goes back to bed, hand resting on Léon's head, trying to temper down the impatience.

Fifty-eight days to go.

* * *

_Again, Thanks guys and I love you all very much!_

_xo_


End file.
